Chapter 36
[YOUTUBE]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Siv2i4hdtAM[/YOUTUBE]
Arnav couldn't help but sigh. Could she get any more perfect he wondered? He knew it would have taken a major leap of faith on her part to even bring this up with him, let alone express herself so eloquently and honestly. It must have been really important for her if she had brought it up with him. He pulled her close and kissed her lips softly. 'Khushi, I won't lie to you but as you've probably guessed... this won't.. it isn't the first time for me. What is a first time for me, just like you, is being in a committed relationship. Khushi, I promise you that we won't do anything you aren't ready for or you don't want to do. Khushi, I would never even dream of pushing you into this. I respect you too much to do that and while I respect where you are coming from and you are right in your views; I am going to be very honest with you and tell you this now Khushi... I'm not religious. I don't follow rituals... And I don't think.. I don't believe in marriage either...' he said quietly knowing this would very well be the statement that was the ultimate deal breaker that spelt the end of this relationship.
Khushi looked into his eyes in. She was stunned. Did he really mean what he said? How could he not believe...? She couldn't understand and she needed to know. 'Why Arnav' she asked simply. She felt him closing down on her; she could see his ASR persona taking over... his guarded expression instantly shielding his thoughts. She cupped his face in her hands 'Arnav... please talk to me, this is important to me... I need to know...' she urged quietly.
On some level Arnav had always known that this discussion was bound to come up between them, particularly as he knew full well just how devoted she was to her Devi Maiya. He knew there was no way to avoid it as she held his face captive, locking her intense gaze with his; she wasn't going to let this conversation drop and Arnav knew full well that there was no way out. Could he do it?
Arnav slowly lifted his eyes looking into hers as he exhaled and sighed deeply 'I stopped being religious when my mother and father died. I just didn't see any point in paying respect to...to some sort of power... the same power that... stole them... so I just stopped believing' he said quietly, his head bowed...a single tear slowly rolling down his cheek.
In that instant Khushi saw the scared, heartbroken, lonely fourteen year old Arnav standing in front of her and not the powerful, rich, business tycoon Arnav Singh Raizada. He looked broken. So vulnerable. Her heart bled for him, for his pain...for his loss and she leaned forward and enveloped him into her arms, hugging him as tight as she could, hot tears falling from her eyes as she cried with him and also for him. Arnav sank into her embrace, his head sinking into the crook of her neck, his own tears slowly beginning to flow in a steady stream. He hadn't cried when it happened because he had, in a blink of an eye become the man of the house, and it felt like he was dishonouring his parents by crying. But now, he felt safe...unjudged in her arms as she held him tight giving him the safe haven that he craved for almost fifteen years but had never found. Her words from their first date in Bangalore resounded in his ears... 'In order to heal, you have to acknowledge the pain.' For the first time in his life, Arnav Singh Raizada let go and cried deeply for his dead parents.
Khushi couldn't help it as she cried with him. His pain was ripping her apart, but she knew without a shadow of a doubt, Arnav needed to do this and if all she could do was hold him; then that's exactly what she would do as she tightened her grip around his shaking shoulders, her right hand sinking into his hair as she soothed him. Khushi felt like she was struggling for breath as his grip tightened as he completely let go and wept. Khushi sent up a silent prayer to all the powers she knew...pleading for them to give Arnav strength and heal his broken heart as she tightened her arms around him even more.
Arnav had no idea of how long they had been standing there in each other's arms when he finally raised his tear stained face from where she held him, his eyes bloodshot and swollen. He inhaled and exhaled deeply. There was no sense of embarrassment for breaking down in front of her. He felt strange... relieved... like a burden he had been carrying for almost fifteen years had been somewhat lightened. He finally felt to some extent, at peace. And it was all thanks to her.
Khushi wiped his tears with her hand and cupped his face 'Are you ok Arnav?' she asked, her voice laden with concern. He nodded. He wanted to thank her, but words seemed so inadequate for the extent of his gratitude, so he simply placed the gentlest of kisses on her lips, his heart beating against hers, the remaining tears on his face blending with the tears rolling down her face unifying them as one in sorrow, his silence conveying what his words couldn't; his utter and most profound gratitude.
Khushi pulled back and led him to the couch and made him sit down. She walked to the kitchen and quickly made a cup of tea for herself and a hot steaming cup of black coffee for him and walked back to where he sat. Arnav grateful accepted the hot drink. How did she instantly know what he needed and when, wondered Arnav as he leaned back into the couch and took a sip of the much needed hot liquid. Khushi sat down next to him; her feet curled under her as she lifted his arm and snuggled into his chest and he curled his arm around her drawing her into him. The storm raging outside was finally beginning to subside and now there was a gentle flow of steady rain. Looked like the weather gods were lending support to his cathartic journey, thought Arnav as he tried to settle his scattered emotions.
'Khushi...' he murmured into her hair 'about what you said earlier... about marriage and all that...' Khushi placed a finger on his lips 'Shhh... Arnav, we don't need to talk about it now. I'm not going anywhere and neither are you... we can talk about it some other time' she said quietly. Arnav was grateful for her reassurance; she was right. They didn't have to work it all out tonight.
'Khushi...'
'Hmmm...'
'Will you stay with me tonight?' he asked, knowing that the answer would most likely be no.
Khushi pulled back and looked at Arnav. She knew he wouldn't have asked unless he really meant it. She thought about it briefly and then nodded. Arnav knew he was being selfish by putting her in a difficult spot with her parents, but he still asked because he really didn't want to be alone tonight. 'But what about Uncle and Aunty...?' he questioned. It was the last thing he needed to worry about she thought, as she laid a finger on his lips, 'let me handle it Arnav' she said simply but authoritatively. Arnav just had to smile; she sounded exactly like him... maybe spending time with him was making his qualities rub off on her. 'I'll be right back' she said rummaged through her bag and pulled out her phone.
She had made her decision and now it was time to act on it.
Khushi walked to the kitchen and as she waited for her Amma to pick up her phone. 'Amma... its me, can you put me on speaker phone so babu-ji can hear me' she asked as she waited. 'Khushi-bitiya, we can both hear you... are... is everything ok' her mother enquired in a worried tone. 'Yes, Amma...everything is fine. Amma, Bau-ji... I need to speak to you about something. I need to stay with Arnav-ji tonight. He... needs me' she said quietly before continuing 'Babu-ji, I know that this is an unusual request, but please trust me...I won't overstep any of my boundaries' she said, sending a silent prayer to Devi Maiya for their support as she waited for their response. Her mother spoke 'Bitiya.. What's happening, something must be wrong for you to ask us this... you know that it's not... appropriate...' said Garima, as her voice trailed off. 'Amma, I know it's not... but I have to do this... please trust me, I'll explain everything to you tomorrow' she said. On the other side of Delhi, Shashi looked at Garima. There was something in Khushi's voice that embodied the urgency and severity of her request. He knew without a doubt that Khushi wouldn't do anything that would cause any repercussions; he trusted her implicitly, and with that Shashi silently nodded indicating his permission. Garima nodded, she didn't agree with Shashi, but knew that she wouldn't be overriding his decision either. 'Bitiya... you have your babu-ji's permission,' Garima said quietly, but with a silent warning edging her voice. Khushi exhaled 'Thank you Amma, Babu-ji... I promise, I will explain everything to you tomorrow' she said as she bid her parents goodbye.
Arnav watched Khushi intently as she spoke to her parents presumably. He couldn't hear the conversation, but could see the frown lines on her face as she spoke. He was just about to get up and tell her not to worry her parents and that he would be taking her home when he saw her smile as finished her conversation. He waited, somewhat nervously, as she walked back to him.
He waited for her to say something but Khushi sat back down, picked up her cup of tea and resumed her earlier positionas she curled back into him. Arnav pulled back. 'Khushi...' he started, but didn't quite know what to ask her.
Khushi looked up into Arnav's eyes, if she was going to stay with him, then she was going to make sure that he relaxed and laughed a little tonight. He deserved to. She smiled as she spoke 'so Arnav... now that you have me for the night, I know exactly what we are doing to do to have some fun' she said with a naughty smile. Arnav looked at her with a mixture of astonishment and slight concern. 'And exactly what might we be doing Khushi' he asked hesitantly. 'Don't worry, Arnav... you're safe, I won't take advantage of you' she said cheekily, waiting for him to bite the bait; he didn't disappoint, 'oh, you don't worry about me... I can handle it... ' he said with a chuckle, 'so tell me, what we are really going to do Khushi?' Khushi stood up and picked up the TV remote control as she announced theatrically 'its late on a Friday night... pouring rain outside...hot tea inside... perfect weather for a movie!!' she announced to him as she switched it on and began to flick through the channels. Business news, CNN, CBN, IBN-7, Bloomberg, NDTV ... Khushi began to get concerned, surely he had entertainment channels. Arnav struggled not to smile; his entertainment bouquet only contained news and business channels. Khushi turned to Arnav 'you do have movie channels don't you?' she asked with great concern. Arnav shook his head 'nope' he said. Khushi looked at him feigning great shock 'Arnav, I might have to re-think this relationship... I mean who doesn't have movie channels!' she said as she pretended to be offended. 'Khushi if that's the best reason you can find to break up with me... you need to try harder' he said in a mock dare.
Even though she had started it, the thought of not being with him sent shivers down her spine and almost made her sick. She swatted his arm, 'don't say that again...ever!' she threatened him seriously.
Arnav pulled her into a hug. It wasn't going to happen. He was beginning to find it difficult to imagine life without Khushi Kumari Gupta with him. This thought made him smile. He yawned as the tiredness re-surfaced. It was a good tired though.
'Arnav...I think you better get some rest...you look really tired' she suggested gently as she cupped his face in one hand.
Arnav had to agree. The last week had been physically exhausting, but the conversation they had just had had wiped him out emotionally. He unwound his arm from her and stood up, stretching his weary muscles before he took her hand and pulled her to her feet.
'Khushi, I know I asked you to stay... but I don't want you to feel uncomfortable so you are welcome to sleep in the bedroom and I'll bunk out on the couch'... or'... he suggested.
'Or..?' she enquired?
'Or, we could share the bed' he said as he tucked a stray lock of hair behind her ear. Arnav was thrilled that she was staying but would she consent to this veiled request as well?
hi darlings... apologies for the delay in updating. Lots going on with me at the moment. A few things:
I'll say this as nicely and as firmly as I can - cliff hangers help do two things: they help me write and they bring you (yes you!) back to read the next chapter. I do not know how to write without cliffhangers (as is evident by the last 36 chapters)... therefore this is not likely to change. Therefore, cant we count this as poor naina's flaw/strength (which ever you please) and make peace with it please.
In response to the many PMs I've received - dont worry this is not turning into a love-story. I am doing my best to stay true to its original essence that two people can teach each other a lot. But I do think its important to establish a few things...given that these two have negotiated power, honesty, respect, integrity it is only natural that they are exploring romance and intimacy next...
Finally, as always I await your comments with baited breath... my sincere thanks in advance for staying with me...
naina😳
Edited by warriorprincess - 11 years ago
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