Previous Part: Page 135
Part 34: Guilt
After Kripa had calmed down and finished her ice cream, Angad and she had walked back into the dining room for dinner. Riddhima and Khushi immediately ran to her side and flanked her to the dining table.
Khushi started chatting away about nothing in particular and Arnav shook his head at her. Kripa had an unwavering small smile on her face while Khushi chatted. Riddhima and Armaan exchanged a glance. Everyone was looking at Kripa, while she smiled looking like she was in her own world.
Khushi shut up suddenly and a moment later, Kripa frowned. 'No! Don't stop talking!"
Khushi's eyes widened and she looked at Kripa. "What?"
Kripa sighed, a slight tinkle in her eyes. "Don't stop talking..." She cradled her tummy in her hands. "I think he likes the sound of your voice. He wiggles a lot when you're talking." Kripa smiled at Khushi.
Khushi squealed and hurried to Kripa's side along with Riddhima. Armaan, Arnav, and Angad watched—amused—as the girls ooh'd and aah'd as they kept their hands against Kripa's bulging tummy. Naina shook her head at them and made them go back to their seats and finish their dinner.
Later, the girls sat in Kripa's room, continuing the conversation about the baby. Somewhere in the middle of the conversation, Riddhima had drifted into thoughts of her own where she imagined her first pregnancy, how she would tell Armaan, how he would react...
Kripa caught her best friend blushing a crimson red. She felt a pang of guilt hit her as she realized how much time Riddhima and Khushi were spending with her. Armaan and Arnav had just gotten back from their eight weeks trip and instead of spending precious moments with them, they were wasting them here with her so that she wouldn't feel sad.
"Alright you two...get out of here." Kripa said sternly.
"w-what?" Riddhima said, snapping out of her thoughts.
"I said get out of here...both of you." Kripa put up her hand when she saw that they were going to argue. "Save it. Guys...go and spend some time with your significant others...stop wasting time here with me. I'm fine, really. Riddhima...Armaan just got back and things between you just got sorted out...spend more time with him...cherish these moments. Trust me...you won't regret it. And you." Kripa turned to Khushi. "Leave me and your jalebi batter alone for a few days. You and Arnav are soon to be married and you're missing out on the special journey from engagement to marriage."
Kripa frowned stubbornly and Riddhima and Khushi exchanged glances. They both knew that they were neglecting their significant others but as far as they felt, Kripa needed them more right now. Both looked back at Kripa.
Kripa groaned. "Just go! I want to sleep anyway."
Riddhima and Khushi knew that Kripa won't change her decision. They gave her a hug and stepped out of the room. Khushi found Arnav in the living room, lounging on a couch, looking through some file. Riddhima smiled and gestured Khushi to go ahead. As Khushi walked to Arnav, Riddhima's eyes scanned around for Armaan.
"He's upstairs." Angad said, walking up to her.
She forced a smile and turned to go up the stairs when she felt Angad's hand clamp around her wrist. She turned to face him.
"Is Kripa okay?" Angad asked.
Riddhima frowned. "Why do you worry about her now? She has people to take care of her and she's strong. She'll make it through this...with you or without you."
"I know you're angry with me, Riddhima...but do you want me to be a bad father to the child she loves so much? I know she's strong and I know she'll get by just fine without me...I'm the weak one..." Angad said honestly.
Riddhima sighed. "I'm still going to try and stay angry with you." She said, her tone slightly light-hearted.
Angad smiled. "That's one more person to the list of people who are angry with me."
"You're ASKING for it, Angad! Why don't you see that everyone is mad at you and not her because you're the one shying away from the responsibility which you're supposed to take! It boggles my mind that she's not mad at you at all." Riddhima frowned.
"Because she understands me. No one else does." Angad gave her a small smile, looked over Riddhima's shoulder and smiled wider and walked away.
Riddhima blinked. Had she seen tears in his eyes? What was he looking at over her shoulder? Riddhima turned to check and found Kripa standing there, looking at Angad's retreating back.
"Kripa I—" Riddhima started but Kripa cut her off.
"Don't worry about it Riddhima. Armaan is upstairs." Kripa winked, turned on her heels and walked back into her room.
Feeling like crap, Riddhima walked up the stairs to look for Armaan. She stopped at a door which was ajar when she heard voices from behind it.
"Are you sure Armaan?" Angad's father was talking.
"Yes Uncle. Thank you for the offer, though. I just got back and I want to spend some time with my wife before I start working. I feel like because of school and coop...I haven't been able to give her much time...I don't want to start work right now. Once she starts working, I'll start working but until then I'd like to spend some quality time with her."
Guilt started to seep into Riddhima's heart. Here he was, neglecting an offer of work for her and she'd been neglecting him.
"Spoken like a great husband. I completely understand Armaan. You should spend time with Riddhima...these are the memories you look back upon when you're older...so make sure they're great memories."
"I will uncle. I promise." Armaan said as they started walking towards the door.
Riddhima hurried away from there so that her eavesdropping wasn't busted. She was particularly quiet on their drive home. Armaan drove with one hand, his other hand gripping hers gently. She absent mindedly walked into the bathroom as soon as they got home. Armaan let her be, thinking that she must be worried about Kripa.
When Riddhima stepped out of the washroom and walked into the living room, she found Armaan staring out into the night from the window. The guilt came rushing back to her. She had left him alone again. She kicked herself mentally, walked up to him and quietly wrapped her arms around him, resting her head on his back.
Armaan smiled but didn't say anything. He put his hands on hers and just cherished her presence.
"I'm sorry Armaan." Riddhima whispered after a couple of minutes of comfortable silence.
Armaan turned around to face her and pulled her closer, wrapping his arms around her waist. "What are you apologizing for?"
"For not being able to give you enough time." Riddhima frowned. "I've been just so caught up with thoughts of Kripa and how to help her and everything that I haven't been able to give you enough time..."
Armaan gave her a small smile. "Kripa needs you right now Riddhima and she's your best friend. I can understand that you want to help her and I don't mind. After seeing the way you're caring for her, the way you're by her side all the time...I respect you even more. I love you even more."
Armaan cupped her face and kissed her forehead. "And I'll be next to you throughout this. Kripa and Angad played a huge role in bringing us together and now we'll return the favour." Armaan paused because Riddhima still didn't look convinced.
"You don't have to turn down the job offer for me..." Riddhima said quietly.
"I'm not...I'm doing it for me...because I don't want to stay away from you just yet. If I resume work, we won't even get what time we get together now."
Riddhima's eyes scanned his face while he smiled at her gently. "I hate myself for ever thinking that you would betray me..."
Her eyes suddenly filled with tears and Armaan embraced her in a tight hug. "Shh Riddhima...let's leave all that behind...we should focus on our today...on our tomorrow..."
"And what do you see in that tomorrow?" Riddhima blushed.
"You, me, and enough children to make a cricket team."
Riddhima giggled as she pulled apart. She sniffed while Armaan wiped her cheeks. When she looked back at him, her expression was serious.
"An entire cricket team? You're sure you're ready for that?" she asked.
He smiled gently. He had registered the underlying, real question she wanted to ask. "Riddhima...Angad and I are best friends, no doubt but it's not necessary that I'm not ready for fatherhood just because he isn't."
Riddhima looked at her toes, embarrassed at her insecurity. "I know but it's just that...if we ever get into that situation...I'm nothing like Kripa...she will make it through this on her own...I won't..."
Armaan cupped her face again and made her look at him. "You won't have to be alone. I would never leave you in a situation like that. Our situation would be different...you're not my girlfriend...you're my wife. And I don't plan my life...my plans are never set in stone like Angad's. I take it as it comes. If my life was planned like Angad's...if my priorities were as rigid as his...we wouldn't be married right now..."
"I'm glad that your priorities aren't set in stone." Riddhima whispered and smiled at him.
Armaan smiled back and moved a strand away from her face. When his eyes moved back to her face, he caught her looking at his lips. Flustered at being caught, Riddhima tried to escape but he wrapped his arms around her waist.
"Where do you think you're going?"
Riddhima's cheeks burned red and she tried to avoid looking at his face. Then, before she knew it, he had picked her up and was making way up to the bedroom. She didn't protest as she walked into the room, kicked the door shut behind him and gently put her down on the bed.
"W—what...what're you doing?" Riddhima choked as he inched closer, the weight of his body leaning comfortably against hers.
Armaan smirked. "Well...I figured that if we were going to make that cricket team, we better get to work."
*
The next morning, everyone sat around at the dining table for breakfast in Khanna House. Everyone chatted excitedly. Angad stole glances at Kripa and Khushi looked at him, lost in thoughts. Armaan was falling asleep with his head resting on his hand. Arnav nudged Armaan for the tenth time.
"Wake up, man!" He said through clenched teeth.
"I'm trying! I had to wake up early to get here for breakfast!" Armaan hissed back.
"It was your wife's idea." Arnav shrugged.
"By the way Armaan...if you knew you had to wake up early, why didn't you just sleep earlier?" Khushi said, rolling her eyes.
Armaan and Riddhima looked at each other and Kripa giggled, earning a few confused looks from the rest. Naina came to the table, holding a tray full of eggs cooked in various ways. Kripa made a face.
"I'm full..."
"You've barely eaten, Kripa!" Dilip said in a fatherly tone.
Kripa smiled. "You sound like pappa..."
The table fell silent and everyone turned to look at her. Angad shifted in his seat awkwardly.
"Well that's because I am a pappa...I'm not a grandfather yet..." Dilip said, trying to lighten the mood.
Kripa forced a smile. "Excuse me."
No one stopped her as she pushed her seat back and walked towards her room. Khushi started to get up but Dilip gestured her to stop and stood up himself. After Dilip and Naina had followed Kripa into her room, Angad stared at his plate, his appetite suddenly absent and the heated glares of almost everyone at the table shooting through his heart.
He pushed his chair back and walked towards Kripa's room. He stopped just outside the door when he heard voices.
"I told you yesterday, didn't I? You can call me pappa from now on and Naina would be more than thrilled if you started calling her mom..."
"You know...if I start addressing you that way...Angad is technically my brother...that's just wrong." Kripa smiled.
"Not necessarily...his wife would address us the same way, wouldn't she?" Naina smiled affectionately.
Kripa looked at her hands. "I'm not his wife...I'm his ex-girlfriend."
"more importantly, you're the mother of his child...the mother of my grandchild...you have just as much right to consider me a father as much as he does." Dilip spoke seriously.
"I'm only here until the baby is born...if I start considering you as a father figure...let's just say I won't be able to be distanced from my father for a second time." Kripa swallowed a lump in her throat.
"You don't have to leave, Kripa..."
"I can't stay here forever. I won't. I'm honestly only here because this baby means so much to you and aunty..."
"the baby means something to Angad too...take it from another woman, Kripa...a woman becomes a mother as soon as she finds out she's pregnant...a man becomes a father when he first sees and holds his child." Naina kept a hand on Kripa's shoulders.
Angad turned on his heels and made his way towards his own room. He shut the door behind him and rested his back on it. He had never felt guiltier about this situation than now.
He had refused to take the responsibility of his own child and Kripa's life was falling apart. A single mother who didn't even have the support of her own parents...yet she was here because of his parents. Despite the fact that he was the reason for the troubles in her life, she was here for his parents.
And she would leave after the baby was born? Angad's heart froze inside out.
Hey guys! First of all, thank you very much to everyone for reading/liking/commenting on the previous part! I really appreciate all your dedication. Coming to the part now, I will be wrapping up this FF in a few more parts...My goal is to finish it after 40 chapters...so about 6 more to go. Hope you all liked this part, I tried to incorporate more of Armaan-Riddhima in this one...
Leave your wonderful comments, my lovelies!
Love,
Katie <3
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