~~~~Chapter 15~~~~
I had to try once more to be with you, gv a chance to my dreams of being happy, in that moment I understaood what meant being in peace with one self. next morning I replied Anirudh, I would accept Walmart's offer. he was elated & then we worked on gathering the information, drawing models, but each night I had to dug in my strength to be able to face you, jus your name increased my pulse, my heart rate went overboard, but each moment I reminded to breath back, for still had those words with me " Main tumhe kha thode jaunga" which u had said long back, jiji's sangeet, my heart had tangoed, with those words then & until now.
Thinking abt you, your eyes the dark angry ones, which were like molten lava, the naughty ones which were like honey orbs, the concentrated ones which are like smooth whisky , all come back to haunt me, for almost 3 years I had shut myself to these sensations, each color I looked had intially bought memories of you green got me teri meri, pink bought the kiss by the poolside & red oh my red it bought diwali & its memories back, the beating heart, the hot small breathes, the tingling all yet I hadnt thought abt those, just colors most of the days intially I had avoided all those colors yet with passing years I had accepted them back as colors, avoiding the memories they evoke but now all had returned back & just bz your name. the hissed sound of "Khushi" when you said kepting tinkling my subconsious, I was losing myself again. yet I knew I would never ove on in life, if I didnt give us that one chance in life, I accepted it as DM blessings, & finally after 3 months of working & being in touch with Amanji, I got that meeting you, The day had arrived to face you, the one who was a mirage to me yet looked a part of me. That day since morning, I was excited apprehensive nervous, I could feel you breath on my nape & your touch on my cheeks, I had felt like this except that diwali night between us, yes I hvnt forgotten that, the golden memory of U & me. but I knew I couldnt move back or step aside there was only way for us ws to move forward to see you.
In your office though I appeared cheeerful & happy when I opened your cabin's door, but I couldnt hv my spirit fall there, when I came forward to meet u & and said the greeting words, my stomach was tying & untying a 1000 knots each second, I had crossed my fingers behind my back & inside in my heart I was chanting, Hey DM please please dunt let Arnav ji throw me out, remember when ever I did anything against ur wishes, u threw me out, sometimes from the roo, the car & ur cabin too. But thank DM u dint do & the whole meeting u kept staring me as if you had seen a glass mirage, which could break if you touched it. during the meeting you eyes didnt leave me for a minute, they felt like they were eating drinking me in a hunger which could never be quenched, I felt so nervous that I almost decide to run away, my arnav ji, yet I couldnt touch him, feel him, why did i decide to torcher myself but I knew the only way was to reach to you, & than the meeting got over, a thousand elephants couldnt tear me away was my feeling yet I knew like I had my choice of coming back, you also should hv that choice of being with me or no. I just couldnt not inflict the pain on you agn so I left you the option.
Those two days were like the Kala pani saaza one gvs to the qaidis, I felt like walking on the burning coal pieces, niether could I sleep & not could I focus on work, nothing was working only Arnav & Arnavji came to mind. Life had come on a standstill & finally when I recvd your msg abt meeting back, I actually danced, my jhinga lala after 3 years, you wouldnt believe I hadnt danced in all the time away from you, nothing had bought me the amount of happiness which ur sms had got me, that night I knew I had reached the place I always wanted to be, I had found my peace, the peace which Aditi & Anirudh had talked abt.
He got up, took her hand & pulled her up. he hugged her with all his might, she could hear his beating heart, the small hot breathes & he rested his face on top of her head, she felt some electricity, how well she fitted to his body, as if crafted from the same block into fitting pcs, then she felt his tears in her hair, hot wet tears, she hugged him as if tonite she didnt want any air between them. his hands roamed on her body, hands arms waist evrywhere yet his tears wouldnt stop. he cupped his face & kissed tenderly on his eyes first on left & then on right & than on forehead, she jus kept holding him, showering him with his love. it seemed eternity till they moved again, she shivered & instantly he realised that she was feeling cold, he picked her up & carried her to bedroom. he told her, you sleep in bed tonite, you are feeling cold I will sleep on the couch tonite, even though she dint want him go she would hv to until the past stood between them. she told him, please hold me n be my side for some moments, Arnav didnt hv in him to deny her simple request, he held her in his arms & kept stroking herm until he saw her eyelids growing heavy & finally sleep laden, he tucked her in the blanket & was turning to turn of the light when he heard the tinkling of her payals.
Again a smile travled to his lips. only she could dare to hv tinkling payals with her complete Jeans & top outfits, yet look cute,
that night when went to lie down on his couch, he felt at peace, a peace which had been missing him, eluding him since that fateful night of hid Di's broken marriage at sheesh mahal, thinking he had to thank may be khushi's DM or his own personal angel his Ma for her return, whoevr it was he thanked them from bottom of his heart. his eyes closed. when he woke somewhere arnd 5 am that night he found khushi sleeping by the side of his couch, her head on his cheast & hand holding his hand, she was sitting in a very unconfortable position yet a rare precious smile on her face. he realised it had abt 2-3 am when he had put her to sleep yet when she hadd come near him, he didnt know. he slowly eased himself from hold stood up & carried her back to the bed, this time when he was leaving, she had again caught his shirt though stilll in deep sleep, he tried to remove her hand, she mumbled in her sleep, dunt leave Arnav ji, how could he deny anything to this angel, he thought so he decided to sleep by her side, he eased her hand, & went to lie on the other side of the bed, quietly he put his hand on her like a long time back he had. n peacefully they slept in silence in compassion in peace.
Next morning when Khushi slowly opened her eyes, she found him by her side, holding her hand. A happy smiled travelled to her eyes, this is peace she thought. slowly she eased back from his freshened up, then when he was ready she woke him, she ordered bf and tea for them & waited, he joined her for tea, his eyes held the most tender emotion & he looked towards, he told her Khushi I dunt know how to thank you for what you did for us, I can never equate it with anything, she smiled to him, es but I this can not be completed until I know abt you. he gulped his tea sudeendly and said what do you mean by that Khushi, she told him I told u my story, u need to tell me urs, how & why u believe in the us between us. its a mutual us so we both need to get back, I need to know Arnavji, I love you a lot, may be more than life itself, but I need to understand you in order to trust u, please explain, tell me abt urself, kill the dragons of insecurities shrouding me. Arnav said, I dunt think Khushi i can do that, I dunt hv the abt to talk like you, Khushi said But I believe u do hv it in you, please unlock urself let me in please. Arnav gv her a thoughtful look, he said to her right now I need to reach office, but please gv me some time to think abt it, I know you would be in the suite as u r on leave, I will come back as soon as possible. but do take care & do not go anywhere, I cant bear to loose you again.
Edited by Jhalak29 - 13 years ago
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
Cricket
CID
35