Anandi's lame excuse

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tinoo

@tinoo

Rocker

Posted: 13 years ago

I have no issues with anandi staying in the haveli if she wants to, that is between her and bhairon...

But seriously, to say that she has responsibilities towards the singhs and blah blah blah blah... that is a little too much. She lives there because she likes it, and she should be honest.

She is not fulfilling any great responsibilities there -- neither the business interests nor the kitchen interests. They keep her there because they have that responsibility towards her, and she stays there because it gives her a platform to do uninterrupted social service.

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Missesha

@Missesha

Dazzler

+ 2

Posted: 13 years ago

Yes even I don't understand why A keeps saying that she will only leave the house when she dies. It is a bit too much to digest. She lives there because she likes there.

Also A is not very clear on what she wants to do with her life.

On one hand she is ok with J-G relationship, and helps J in all possible ways, but on other hand she doesn't give J a divorce so that both J-A can come out of the burden of this relationship .

Similarly she lives in haveli as a bahu but she is not waiting for J to return to her. So why is living as bahu there?

And knowing Anandi, she is definately not a sadist, who wants to see G suffering, so in my POV either A should legally get J back and stay as his wife/ bahu in haveli or walk out of haveli and make her life.

She can't be serving as a bahu for all her life aimlessly.

Edited by Missesha - 13 years ago

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Asha

@Chytra

Voyager

Posted: 13 years ago

I am sorry but I disagree with you tinoo.

It is brainwashed to every girl that she has to live in in laws house or die but never return to parents. The society I live in will never let such a girl live. Every man would try to take advantage of her. Every small thing will build into a rumor. Their is no need to add ghee as her husband already left!. going to her parents house would only worsen things,make them die of shame in front of all village. Everyone will look down at her as if they own her. I have seen hell lot of such situations with my own eyes. Believe me life is not easy for women in villages.

The relation she shared with her inlaws is far more strong and deep than with her parents. As a parent, everyone will love their children but to gain everyone' heart in the family you never knew was not easy. I worked 8 good years for where I stand now and trust me it wasn't easy at all. and if my husband jumps in to someone else bandwagon. I will sue him for sure but I will never leave this house because I earned it. Built every part of it with hell lot patience, sacrifice and love.

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tinoo

@tinoo

Rocker

Posted: 13 years ago

@ashahai --

I want to clarify that I have no issues with the fact that she stays there...but i think she should be honest about it, and say that she stays there because she likes it and she likes them...not because of the storyline that she stays there because she has to pick up the responsibilities towards the family that Jagya washed his hands off. i.e. she has to step into the role of the son.

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Chee_Chee

@Chee_Chee

Beginner

Posted: 13 years ago

Jagat to Anadi: Tum kabhi bhi Gauri ko us ghar ki bahu nahin banne dogi 😆😆😆

As if she deserves it or she wants to be. Is gadhe ko ye nahin maloom ki yeh bahoo sirf ek challenge (with her saas) ke liye use pyar karti hai.

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tinoo

@tinoo

Rocker

Posted: 13 years ago

Originally posted by: Missesha
Yes even I don't understand why A keeps saying that she will only leave the house when she dies. It is a bit too much to digest. She lives there because she likes there.

Also A is not very clear on what she wants to do with her life.

On one hand she is ok with J-G relationship, and helps J in all possible ways, but on other hand she doesn't give J a divorce so that both J-A can come out of the burden of this relationship .

Similarly she lives in haveli as a bahu but she is not waiting for J to return to her. So why is living as bahu there?

And knowing Anandi, she is definately not a sadist, who wants to see G suffering, so in my POV either A should legally get J back and stay as his wife/ bahu in haveli or walk out of haveli and make her life.

She can't be serving as a bahu for all her life aimlessly.

Yes.

Either she should take the stand that she still cares for Jagya and wants him back (and be open about it)... or if that is not the case,

then she should take the stand that she wants gauri to have the position of bahu (which she already has taken) , as Jagya would like... and leave the haveli. Whether the haveli folks accept gauri or not is not the issue really... but it would certainly be impossible to do it while she continues to stay there.

To continue to stay there and to keep getting involved in J-G's life during her stay there is slightly ridiculous.

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Asha

@Chytra

Voyager

Posted: 13 years ago

Originally posted by: tinoo
@ashahai --

I want to clarify that I have no issues with the fact that she stays there...but i think she should be honest about it, and say that she stays there because she likes it and she likes them...not because of the storyline that she stays there because she has to pick up the responsibilities towards the family that Jagya washed his hands off. i.e. she has to step into the role of the son.

@tinoo,

Loving your family and wanting to live with them is not lame. I felt bad when I saw the title. She honors them. She will look after his family. At least the responsibilities are not inescapable. there are several real life instances where the bahu becomes beta of the house.

I have no idea where you live but I am from a village. Once a girl gets married, she is one of the pillars. She will have her share of duties. Even a small sparrow which will have a seasonal mate will defend its house.

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Manasi

@Manasi_16

Stunner

+ 9

Posted: 13 years ago

Tinoo, I tend to differ here a bit. As a DIL, she does have responsibilities towards the Singhs...moreover, now she fulfills a son's responsibility more than DIL. She may not be contributing significantly to any tangible task related responsibility. But emotionally she is fulfilling a lot more.

The Singhs have already lost a son. If she also leaves, the sense of failure and loss will increase greatly. Anandi's presence in the haveli is kinda soothing to the Singhs coz at least they feel they have not ruined her life completely...by looking after her...by taking on her responsibility even after Jagya, they are protecting her from the social stigma which was otherwise inevitable. They are giving her the social standing & secuirty which she lost after her marriage broke. This was from the Singhs' perspective.

Coming to Anandi...If you talk of the emotional & social aspect, Anandi shields the Singh family from the whole world!

Theirs is the most respected family in the nearby areas. Everyone know what Jagya meant to them, and how imp was the dream of the hospital. When Jagya broke all social rules & dreams, Anandi put them back together. If Anandi leaves & goes back to her parents, the Singhs will be the laughing stock of the whole village.

Dadisa always used to take pride in her family values & her fairness. And now her own grandson displays utter lack of value system as well as a disregard for the family's dreams...not only did he remarry but he also refused to fulfill DS's longstanding dream. It is Anandi who does that. So she takes on a son's role.

When the world sees that the family is supporting their DIL against their only son...the family takes on a godlike place in the eyes of the villagers. By staying back, Anandi is keeping intact the self-respect of the Singhs and the respect of the family in eyes of the people. And as you must be knowing, in the India social system, the son is supposed to uphold family values & honour. So in absence of Jagya...Anandi is fulfilling all social & emotional duties of a son

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Manasi

@Manasi_16

Stunner

+ 9

Posted: 13 years ago

Originally posted by: ashahai_aamanke
[
@tinoo,

Loving your family and wanting to live with them is not lame. I felt bad when I saw the title. She honors them. She will look after his family. At least the responsibilities are not inescapable. there are several real life instances where the bahu becomes beta of the house.

I have no idea where you live but I am from a village. Once a girl gets married, she is one of the pillars. She will have her share of duties. Even a small sparrow which will have a seasonal mate will defend its house.

@bold: I agree...once you get married, you are part of the family. Just bcoz the husband walked out on you, doesn't mean you also should do the same & increase their guilt &grief!

If the in-laws are bad & unsupportive, then its a different case...but not here!

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tinoo

@tinoo

Rocker

Posted: 13 years ago

#10

Originally posted by: ashahai_aamanke

@tinoo,

Loving your family and wanting to live with them is not lame. I felt bad when I saw the title. She honors them. She will look after his family. At least the responsibilities are not inescapable. there are several real life instances where the bahu becomes beta of the house.

I have no idea where you live but I am from a village. Once a girl gets married, she is one of the pillars. She will have her share of duties. Even a small sparrow which will have a seasonal mate will defend its house.

ashahai -- I am very sorry that I hurt you/offended you. That was not my intention. Please accept my apologies.

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