Khushi muttered something inaudible, hitched eight months Adi further up her hips, and rushed towards the door. God, you are a mess! Half of her jet-black hair was now shine less damp curls around her neck while the rest were tied untidily in a bun. Her sun-kissed skin was lacking glow, her red shirt with bear print darkened in patches after looking after her two small children. She thought about her poor appearance as she opened the door to a post-man. Smiling courteously, she took the envelope and signed for the delivery. As she closed the door, she looked at the package in her hand addressed in her name, the ugly brown cover weighed almost nothing and before her curiosity could take over her, Adi leaped at it, putting it on the table she took Adi for his bath without giving a second thought to the envelope.
Looking at Adi playing with his favourite duck she realised how perfect her life was. She had two perfect kids she would sacrifice her life for and a husband who could still give her shivers with one look. She looked at Adi and found genes of his father's handsome look. She bit her lip feeling guilty for not giving her husband, Arnav his share of time. Since Adi was teething it was very hard for her to leave him alone, much less do anything else. Picking up Adi from bathtub and wrapping a towel around him she took him to her bedroom. The greedy child was drooping on her shoulder but was still determined to throw tantrum by tugging at her shirt button in an effort to expose her breast.
'My baby is hungry, like father like son,' she muttered to herself as she settled Adi on her lap to offer him her ripe fruit and looked at her two year old daughter, Aasmi sleeping on the other side of her bed enjoying her nap. Her heart filled with love and pride looking at her kids. She loved them so much, oh how she loved them! As Adi pulled away from her closing his eyes, Khushi patted his back and made him sleep next to Aasmi keeping pillows on the either side of her children.
He was late again, she thought as she looked at the clock striking eight with a sigh. He was late almost every day because of his new project. Keeping her feet on the table with head thrown backward on the couch, she finally relaxed. At twenty-three she sometimes felt like a fifty year old, though she wouldn't trade her life for anything, she still wondered how her life would have been had she not met Arnav, dull maybe she mused. Her eyes suddenly caught the sight of envelop and with aching limbs she picked it up. Opening the seal, she peeped inside to find some overturned photographs.
Curiosity got better of her and she spread the contents on the table and picked up the photographs with what seemed like an effort. If someone could have said to her before two minutes that you could freeze in literal sense she would have probably laughed but that was what she experienced at the moment. With her face pale white, eyes frozen like saucers she looked at the man in the picture. It was her husband who was interlocked in an intimate embrace with his secretary.
The first thought was she was hallucinating, that maybe lack of sleep has started messing around with her mind but as the clock continued ticking the reality started seeping in. Oh! How could he betray her like this? How could he forget all the promises made to her? How could he forget their kids? How could her husband cheat on her with his secretary? With numb fingers she put the pictures back in the envelope and looked around her. Married to a millionaire business tycoon, there was nothing she couldn't have but suddenly she felt as if the life has been punched out of her and she has nothing. Nothing! She thought in anguish. She remembered her wedding, her first kiss, her transformation from a girl to a woman, her journey to motherhood, and all those small incidents which makes life worth living and it left a bitter taste in her mouth. She felt sick, making her sway, she closed her eyes, remembered other times when he had tried to make love with her only to find her too tired. But she'd thought they had sorted out that problem! Was it only four nights ago when Adi was sleeping through the night, she had initiated their passionate and volatile love-making feeling more rested. Was it only her imagination that Arnav was trembling in her arms afterwards? How could their love mean so little to him when it was her very existence for living!
The sound of the key turning brought her to her senses, and almost too calmly she looked at the painting above the mantle gifted by her mother on her birthday. It was only eight-thirty and she felt bitter realising that out of every day he was early today as if her fate was mocking her. Sitting with her back towards him she refused to acknowledge his presence. After a moment's pause he pressed a chaste kiss to her cheek from behind the couch and went towards the alcohol cabinet to pour a stiff drink. Not responding to his kiss she sat uptight wondering how could he act so calm when her whole life was turning upside down. He sat on the couch, closing his eyes as his head the back of the couch giving Khushi a perfect opportunity to study him. At twenty-eight, five years older to her he was a perfect specimen of his gender. With thick hair, tanned skin and lips which could make an ice-cream melt he was sex on legs. Passion was as much a part of him as his name. He was such a hot-blooded male that sometimes she felt inadequate.
He looked at her with eyes half-closed but her emotions must have given something away because immediately his body and eyes were on alert. His posture did not change but he did open his eyes completely and narrowed in concentration.
'Did something happen?' he asked in his patented husky tone. Tone which use to remind her of their long love-making sessions but not anymore.
'Khushi, I asked you something!' he asked again but this time this voice was hanging on a thin thread of patience. Meeting her cold eyes he must have realised that something was wrong because he, at once was sitting beside her on the couch.
With strangely controlled emotions, she picked up the envelope and pushed it towards him. Frowning he picked up the envelope, a gesture often used by their daughter when she concentrated too much. Opening it, his expression changed all of a sudden and only a twitch in his jaw was the indication that he was affected.
'Khus- ,' he was about to say something but she had, had enough of him for tonight. Sick at knowing all her life was a lie, she got up to go but immediately he stood up and blocked her way.
'Listen, Khushi…it was-,' he put hands on her shoulders and suddenly all hell broke loose. She jerked his hands away and slapped him so hard that her whole body vibrated with the effort.
'No, you don't…not this time! I have had enough of you for a lifetime.' She yelled at him and before he could reach for her she went back and tears of hurt and anger rolled down her cheeks.
'I gave you everything! Damn you, everything! I don't have a career, I don't have an ambition because I am busy being a wife and a mother, sometimes I am so tired that I can't even stand it and how do you repay me? By going to another woman? How can you face yourself in the mirror every day? How can you do this to me, to us, our children? Did you even think of them? How can you hug them, kiss them knowing you have jeopardized their future? And for what? A night? Two nights? A week? You make me sick. " Khushi gulped down her saliva and roughly rubbed her tears away.
"I need to make you understand, it wasn't like that." Arnav said in anguish with his hands in his hair.
"How was it then?" Khushi's voice quivered and she stood looking at him with hurtful eyes.
"Can you please answer me one question honestly?" Khushi asked him trembling violently.
Arnav nodded helplessly seeing her hurt herself and feeling ashamed all over again.
"Was she worth it? Was she that good in bed?" She left a shocked gasp as soon as words left her mouth. Was she really that shallow to need assurance that she was still a woman even after her husband was unfaithful? Where was her pride and self-respect? Choking on her sob she turned to fled but only Arnav was too quick for her. He caught her struggling arms bringing her back was to his chest.
Arnav muttered in her ears holding her in his arms, restricting her struggle "I swear, I didn't mean to do- you were so much into kids late-".
Khushi stood still, stopping her struggles and muttered emotionlessly, "They are your kids also. If you wife can't give it to you, you can take it from your secretary. You disgust me so much! If all you want to sate is your lust then you are no better than an animal."
Arnav released her and she looked at him with wounded eyes and said, "I wish I could divorce you, oh I hate you so much!"
The next moment she realised she was in his arms. His arms locked her into the intimate embrace while his lips worked his magic on her. She would not react, never! But after a moment she felt her body betraying herself and her pain got much worse knowing all he had to do was touch her and she was destroyed. Wanting to hurt him physically as he was hurting her emotionally she gave in to the passion, into that kiss her hands clawing at his back. She realised he was shocked at her behaviour when he hesitated for a second but she was beyond caring. They started removing each other's clothes in a frenzy of wild emotions; fell on the couch with their limbs tangled. What started out as a punishment turned into love, into something deeper than that. He touched her all over and drove her crazy with his hands and mouth. It was when he entered her swiftly she murmured ' I love you' and wept the tears of shame.
Later when he held her in his arms and cold air started touching her, she realised again she had succumbed to her emotions.
He caressed her cheeks but she turned head away in shame and muttered, "I can't do this, I can't live with you anymore. This does not solve anything her."
He forcibly held her chin with sudden anger and said, "Shut up, I have had enough of you. Now, you listen to me! I have been trying to tell you something, nothing happened with me and her. I swear on our children. I don't know who clicked the picture and how you got it but what you think is not true. I was trying to tell you, yes we kissed in a weak moment and then I realised it was not you, not your taste. How can I cheat on you when I love you so much that it hurts? I was little irritated with you for not putting my needs first but I understood that our baby should be your priority. I know you are a great wife and mother and am so proud of that fact. I bloody love you like you love me but I expect you to trust me. We made love and you make it sound so cheap. If you think I just love you for your body then think again."
She wept softly and he wiped her tears "There is only one woman for me and that's you…I love my family too much to risk any trouble. You, Aashmi and Adi are my whole world."
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