Swamini's marriage-- listen up all - Page 2

You are right...We are not denying her right to speak to her father or show her concern just because she is single...

your post comes as a breath of fresh air..and I really liked the views of lilmizsnshine..very pragmatic.. I know what topics you are talking about.. and in fact I even commented against the general theme of the topic.. it was downright disturbing for me to see ppl comment 'like who is going to marry her.. obv thts y she is single and grumpy..' am in fact copy pasting my comment to give light of my view on the whole domestic bias that Swamini carries in this forum..

I was really happy upon seeing this post.
My only problem with Swamini is that she says that J shouldn't talk to her sister soo much, there was no need to bring Manvi for the birthday. And for this I do blame her unmarried status, I'm assuming she never got married cause they haven't revealed her past, for such presumptions on her part. Since she never had to leave her family she doesn't understand J's pain. Her maayka is her family first and she 'll always love them and give them alot of importance. So yeah, please don't make a face when she wants to open her maayka presents first cause those ppl have brought her up and it's been 3 days to her wedding and she misses them. Also, please don't make faces when she is talking to them on the phone, cause that's the best contact she's going to have with them as they live in a different city.

As far as her being the decision maker is concerned, I don't question her authority but I do at times question her decisions. And I think that's what most ppl on this forum do when they criticise her.

I definitely do not think that she is evil, I don't think anyone on this show is. That's what's great about this show. That everyone has a well defined character and flaws, no Tulsis. Except maybe Jeevika 😆
But I guess her sin (acc to swam and dadaji) would be her love for mannu.

Also, I would like to appreciate the efforts of bua and dadaji for unstilling discipline into their grandsons cause that's very important in today's day and age as boys get spoilt very easily especially if you have soo much money.

Originally posted by: sonali.19281

you mean to suggest that an old unmarried woman has no right to pride.. pride of her convictions.. of her psyche.. interesting tangent you present.. on the contrary her history for me is rather intriguing.. and respect again is also earned not commanded.. V bros till now havent suggested that she commands that respect from them but rather earns it.. so give her some benefit will ya..😃 and secondly.. she is very in line in her behaviour.. doesnt hound one like a dog.. she knows where she can and should call shots.. she mostly does so in Viren's matter as she feels that right by his own compliance.. i for one havent seen her presume the same right over virat.. she keeps her opinion to herself about both inder and virat in spite of dadaji's irk..

my point again being.. if she has the persona and better judgement to take care of some aspects in the family its rather unfair to suggest she has no right by virtue of the fact that she aint married.. or in her mayka.. seriously now.. we dont know what happened.. maybe after her bros death she did get everything together.. even gave up her own life / desire for Viren ... as an outsider its natural for Manvi to find it odd or Jeevika to.. but have we seen any of the waderas taking offense.. heck even Virat being the free spirit has this inherent respect for bua more than dadaji.. never seen him make a dig on her.. in fact respects her .. there must be some reason right..

i dont mind being called a swamini lover.. coz I DO LIKE HER.. and before m branded hiter, mocambo etc.. feel free to read the post yet again with an open mind..

odd for her.. 😆 I dont mind Swamini.. in fact like some of her traits.. in fact she may be the only woman in the whole show with a strong persona..

she is still better than the bua in navya :)

OH THIS IS TURNING OUT TO BE A REALLY WONDERFUL DISCUSSION.

@ lilmzsunshine- thanks for your input. I have seen both type of families- one where daughters do so much for their parents and the other where daughters only rule the house with no responsibilities. I wouldn't mind any daughter making a decision for their parents as long as they understand their own responsibilities too.
What I am trying to say is that I hate the double standard when it comes to the daughter and DIL's. It is not fair of expecting a girl to forget everything about their mayaka house after marriage. The bonding a girl has with her parents or siblings can't be replaced. But here Swamini is doing exactly the same thing with Jeevika. That is not fair I think. I do understand that the living situation, rules and regulations in each house differ and that's when you need lot of your mayaka support so that you can settle in this new house. But try's to break these strings will cause bigger void in Jeevika's life.

Coming to my own situation, I live with my inlaws. My MIL is an awesome person, I don't have an issue with here. But still I will always remain an outsider in their family unit. I help her in everyway I can- taking her around to docs, family functions, cook etc despite her unmarried daughter at home. My MIL does a lot for me by keeping kids at home when I am at work.
But the double standard hits when- my SIL ( my hubby's sister) has an issue with me helping my brothers by taking my dad to a doc's appointment. Emmm I take care of you parents all the time. Doesn't make sense to me. Coz my philosophy is that if someone needs help and I am capable of it, no matter what relation they have with me but they will be helped.
It's these double standards are that bother me. The daughter or the son- both have equal responsibilities towards their parents. When our parents did not raise us differently, no one else will tell us to forget them, not help them coz they are not here forever. I will give my life to bring them back for one day.

I relate to Jeevika and her love towards her sister coz my brothers mean everything to me now. :)

Originally posted by: raji_b

@ lilmzsunshine- thanks for your input. I have seen both type of families- one where daughters do so much for their parents and the other where daughters only rule the house with no responsibilities. I wouldn't mind any daughter making a decision for their parents as long as they understand their own responsibilities too.
What I am trying to say is that I hate the double standard when it comes to the daughter and DIL's. It is not fair of expecting a girl to forget everything about their mayaka house after marriage. The bonding a girl has with her parents or siblings can't be replaced. But here Swamini is doing exactly the same thing with Jeevika. That is not fair I think. I do understand that the living situation, rules and regulations in each house differ and that's when you need lot of your mayaka support so that you can settle in this new house. But try's to break these strings will cause bigger void in Jeevika's life.

Coming to my own situation, I live with my inlaws. My MIL is an awesome person, I don't have an issue with here. But still I will always remain an outsider in their family unit. I help her in everyway I can- taking her around to docs, family functions, cook etc despite her unmarried daughter at home. My MIL does a lot for me by keeping kids at home when I am at work.
But the double standard hits when- my SIL ( my hubby's sister) has an issue with me helping my brothers by taking my dad to a doc's appointment. Emmm I take care of you parents all the time. Doesn't make sense to me. Coz my philosophy is that if someone needs help and I am capable of it, no matter what relation they have with me but they will be helped.
It's these double standards are that bother me. The daughter or the son- both have equal responsibilities towards their parents. When our parents did not raise us differently, no one else will tell us to forget them, not help them coz they are not here forever. I will give my life to bring them back for one day.

I relate to Jeevika and her love towards her sister coz my brothers mean everything to me now. :)