That is the depth of his love for me. But things weren't as smooth and rosy to begin with. After last week's argument with Ishaan and his apology for his outrage, Ishaan and I spent some time with each other. It felt like a date, you know, we ate ice cream, talked about the romance of rain and even danced in the rain!! It was awesome. It felt like old times. We were both very happy but the moment shattered soon enough as Ishaan once again told me to go to my husband, Shivram's house. My hopes to reunite with Ishaan were dashed. I was in shock and this emotional yo-yo was too much for me to handle so I didn't even pick calls from home. I knew everyone would be worried about me as they didn't know where I was but I couldn't get a hold on my emotions. I sat in the park, crying my heart out. Then suddenly, dad called. I asked him to come get me. I went to dad's house and told them the whole story. Needless to say, Sanjana and dad were upset and tensed to see me cry. They were angry that I hadn't told them about the problems I was going through. I gave them my reasons and though they weren't satisfied with it, they accepted the same.
The next day Badi ma, Dadaji and papa came to take me home. Dadaji was angry with me as I left home without telling anyone and later didn't take their call. It was sweet to see my family fighting over me and my well being. They said they loved me and that I belonged in their house and wanted me to return home. But Badi ma felt I should stay at dad's place and let Ishaan miss me. Later, I was thrilled to hear that BIL [brother –in-law] is back and happy for Panna didi. What Badi ma said was so true that when things happen suddenly you can't process happiness or sorrow.
Sanjana was really worried about me and I ended up crying about my life to her. I felt I was being punished for all the hatred I showed towards Ishaan initially. I realised that love is strange. It is powerful to get you flying high and it can also push you into depths of despair. Perhaps what is happening to me is karma. I made Ishaan wait for me for over a year so maybe that's why God is putting me through this. He suffered in love and now, so am I. Guess I took a long while to become Suhana Kashyap from Suhana Bajpai, so now I have to pay for it. Before I realised I love Ishaan, I didn't think of his happiness or suffering or longing for me. Ishaan too must have felt the pain of love like I am feeling now. But I wonder, do I deserve this pain?
Ishaan was worried for me and called to ask about my well-being but I was unable to talk to him. I broke down. I knew he would come to see me and he did. His love and concern for me couldn't keep him away. Ishaan was furious at dad as he thought he was my father in law. Ishaan felt my in-laws were torturing me. I was very happy and emotional to see him.
He told me I should not stay with an unloving husband. He finally spoke his heart out and said if I broke off with Shivram, he would marry me!! I was thrilled to hear him say that. I understood that even though he didn't remember me as Suhana but thought of me as Shashikala, he really cared for me. I realised how much he loved me. If we had a love marriage, perhaps this would be what the both of us would be feeling about each other. What Ishaan said was so beautiful that he felt a connect with me, a janamo ka naata and he said I was his Suhana, the girl he dreams about.
I finally feel like my wait is over and I will be with Ishaan forever. Dear readers, I cannot tell you how relieved I am with the turn of events. I know Ishaan hasn't recovered completely, but at least we are getting a fresh start together and I am really thankful for it.
If you have any suggestions for me or simply want to drop a line, do write in at suhana@starplus.in and don't forget to watch Sasural Genda Phool every Monday to Friday at 7.30 pm only on STAR Plus.