Newly Married, Arranged Marriage, Need ur Opinion

ok, I am from US and recently got married to a girl in Punjab. I have been living in US for 10 years. I went to Indian and stayed with her for 2 weeks after marriage. When I was there, I told her few good things I liked about here but she kept focusing on what she does not like in me. I asked why are you criticizing so much, she said critics are your best friends. But I would rather focus on good things then to tell the other person that these are the things I do not like in you and u need to change.

I am a little romantic, and I found out after marriage that she is not at all, she does not even like to talk about things that are emotional.

She does not even like to be touched. I want to be able to hold hands and wanted to hug and kiss my wife on times but she said she does not like this kind of stuff. She likes it occasionally but not everyday. I said it is important to me, she said she will try but most likely this is not gonna happen.

She cares about me though, i got an upset stomach when i was there and she checked on me in the middle of the night. But she never expresses herself. I told her that I like her, she did not say any such things to me.

Is this how girls are like in the beginning of an arranged marriage. Need someone's opinion who has been through an arranged marriage.

Also, I have come back to US and I asked her if she can video chat with me, she has a computer and webcam at home but she said she does not like to video chat, I asked we can just chat on google then, no video, she said she does not like to chat either. She talks very less, that's her nature, so our conversations on the phone are just 10 to 20 min long. I asked, we can play some game online with each other, she said no. I asked her why, she said she does not want to, I asked her is this how you are going to be "just saying no all the time" she said yes that's how i am.

She is very looks cautious, usually girls say they want a guy who is caring, romantic, sweet etc. but she always says she wanted a guy who looks like this, with this hair style etc.

Is she going to be emotionally devoid, unromantic, and inexpressive for the rest of our life? We are only married for a month and I already feel like my life is going to be boring. Her nature seems like more that of a guy who does not want to chat or communicate, usually girls are the ones that want to talk more than guys.

i m not married but i think she is kind of nervouse but try to talk to her

Give her time to open up.

Iam not married but i think you have to give her sometime.

maybe she i just nervous talking to boys....
remeber she also adjusting to a new wrld....a new life...new realtionships......she had to leave her hme nd step into a new househld...it can be difficult

I am surprized you didn't ask or talk to her about her likes/dislikes about these issues and her personality before marriage, especially when these are important to you!!

@persistence

I talked to her before marriage. She talked less to begin with, i talked to my family, they said do not worry about the way she talks as girls do not talk much before marriage especially in arranged marriage.

Whenever I would mention anything like it is common for girls and guys these days to be friends in India. She would not say anything. She would not say anything when I asked her any questions that were intimate. I asked her to why she does not respond much when these topics come up, she said her parents are nearby and she is hesitant to talk about it. What was i suppose to do?

I am 100% sure that she was not involved with someone else. There has been only 2 times she actually hugged me and pulled me towards her over the period of 2 weeks. I usually hug her or kiss her during the day which she does not like and she doe not like to have any contact when going to sleep, not even holding hands. Not sure if she is just shy or if she will change.

well, what is done is done! I guess you can wait now and see what happens. Perhaps, she is not in love with you yet. Maybe you two will be able to be more intimate when you actually fall in love with each other (deeply) and form a deep emotional bond.

Plus she told me few things on the first night that I need to change about myself. Basically hairstyle, workout, wear fancy clothes etc. She says that's what she likes on a guy. I told her love is about getting to know someone and liking them for who they are. She keeps quite but bring it up again that that's what she likes. I told her that I like her for who she is, she says, i just told you what i like and it is upto me whether i do it or not. She says, 'I want my husband to be life this and this'. Basically, she not spending time to get to know me or who I am but wants to change me off the bat.

She said I can also tell her what I like and what she needs to change and she will happily change it.