Who is the better singer? It all depends

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Who is the better singer? It all depends on where you come from

Vinit and Debojit, Lucknow and the entire Northeast, not to mention viewers, will be happy when Final Friday (24 February) comes and goes. Preferably goes. That's the day Sa Re Ga Ma Pa goes Dha Ni Sa and it's alvida to the talent contest that has taught us one salutary lesson: it's not about how you sing, it's about getting others to sing for you.

That the show has taken so long to reach the last stage is truly astonishing when it was fairly clear (at least four months ago) that Debo, as he is fondly called, was going to be in the reckoning and that Vinit would be throwing his baseball hat into the ring, too. Debo and Vinit possess the widespread appeal of your average boy next door who, in addition, can sing outside the bathroom.

The cardinal rule in these contests is to ensure that the most talented performers do not win. No offence, Debo and Vinit, but Himani and Nihira were nightingales to your larks (feminists please note, girls are losing to the boys). When, last, did you watch a talent contest in which the best man — or woman — won? Never, right? Unless it was American Idol's Kelly CLARKSON who, by the way, won a Grammy Award the other day. Girl, oh girl, can she sing. Sorry, Debo and Vini, you sound good but you're no Kelly CLARKSON .

So you thought talent contests were about talent. Sure are but it's not good enough to have noodles of talent, you must have oodles of audience appeal. Don't confuse that with sex or star appeal. And, don't make the mistake of thinking you need to be top of the pops with the judges, either, just with those Tom-thumbs on the SMS alphabet. Essentially, talent contests are SMS contests.

And, rather like elections. Only, here, each contestant campaigns for him or herself more brazenly than any politician ever did: politicians promise you roti, kapda and makaan, these contestants plead, beg, implore: ''Vote for me. Please, if you like Debojit's blond-streaked hair, vote for Debojit at 3333.'' And what do you get? What you voted for: Debojit's blond-streaked hair.

Like the blond-streaked hair, there is something so false about Sa Re Ga Ma Pa and shows like it. Last week, we were being asked to vote for Vinit, not because we liked his voice, his baseball cap or any other personal characteristic. His 'guru' Himesh Reshmaiyya did a Rang De Basanti on us: ''Vote as an Indian for an Indian.'' He didn't say Debojit was not an Indian, or mention the well-publicised fact that he is from the Northeast but we got his drift. Meanwhile, young Vinit is from the Hindi heartland of Lucknow and deserves your ''aashirwad''.

Lovely. First, the best singers are voted out, then the finalists demand and receive votes on the basis of caste, creed or region. Next stop religion? Thus, what ought to have been a search for the best singer has been transformed into an "honour killing" regional conflict. If you're from anywhere east of Kolkata or the Northeast, vote for Debojit; if you're from anywhere else north of the Vindhyas, vote for Vinit. And what about south?

Does this say something about the nature of India and Indians or more about the show? Probably, both. The show has, throughout, encouraged conflict — particularly between its illustrious gurus who have distinguished themselves by their bad manners, temper tantrums and partisan politics. There have been times when the show has been reduced to a street fight and barring the fisticuffs we've seen it all — walk-outs, shout-outs and just downright loutish behaviour.

Sa Re Ga Ma Pa used to be one of the most enjoyable singing shows on television. Now, it's dividing a nation on the basis of mobile phones (to say nothing about regionalism).

The SMS revolution has consumed news channels too. So, what we have here is a neat little alliance between the mobile companies and the TV channels who betwen them carve out a pretty little commercial profit from the thousands of messages we SMS the channels. Didn't you just know it: Sa Re Ga Ma Pa isn't about great singing, it's about the cash registers ringing.