ArSh OS - So Close, So Far ( Part 2 - Page 3 )

A few months ago, there was this girl who would joke around freely and pull pranks on others, but if she had ever known that after coming to Sanjeevani her life would take such a turn, she probably would have never came here. Until now, she would believe in just about everything except love because everytime the word 'love' appeared in her life, it only seemed to create problems. She had always been deprived of love and she figured out that it was best for her to live without love. In fact, she was firm on her decision and she never let anyone near her nor did she let herself fall in love. Well, not until she met him ; the guy who she could be herself with. She did not have to pretend to be someone else with him and no matter how much she tried to hide herself from him, he would always guess everything just by looking into her gorgeous eyes.

However, just when she thought things were slowly falling into place and there was really a person she could trust and expose herself to without the fear of getting hurt, life played a cruel game with her again. It made her lose trust in everything once again. A person could be hurt once, twice or even three times, but there comes a point in life where you get tired of everything and everyone around you. The only thing you would want to do is run away, as far as you can ; from memories, from people, from feelings and even from yourself. That is exactly where she is right now, away from everyone, running towards her favourite spot with hope to hide herself from the world.

Walking slowly along the path, trying to get hold of herself, to try and not to break down and cry ; thinking to herself where she went wrong, what was her mistake? She fell onto her knees as she felt them being burried beneath the soft sand, she looked in front and it seemed to be describing her feelings ; the dark sky showed just how dark her life is at this point, the endless sea making her think about how her problems were never ending, the silence telling her to give up and end it all at this very moment.

" WHY?!" She screamed as she looked into the sky which was so empty, nothing was there ; no stars to wish upon, but just that moon.

" WHAT was my MISTAKE? TELL ME!" She used all the power she had to shout as loud as she could, while wiping her tears which rushed down her cheeks in no time as she felt her face burning ; with anger, hurt, pain and loneliness.

She closed her eyes as she wiped her tears which she believe was her last tear drop she wasted on him. She cannot be that weak can she? She always heard numerous quotes on love but right now none could describe her feelings perfectly.

No Shilpa. Just hang on... You have got to be strong and it's gonna be really hard but just try. Besides, pain doesn't hurt if it's all that you ever felt so it is pointless to cry...Who are you even crying for...Armaan? Is he worth it?... No one is worth your tears, and the one who is, won't ever make you cry' Forget about Armaan...He is not worth it, he doesn't deserve you.

Finally she managed to get enough strength to stand up on her feet as she headed closer to the sea ; completely lost in the flashback which destroyed her whole world.

***

He stood there in the basketball court trying to score a basket but all in vain. He had been trying for what felt like an eternity but could not even score once. He was constantly chanting to himself to go on and forget about her.

What is wrong with him? And who is he talking about ?... Why does he want to forget her? Shilpa thought to herself as she hid behind a tree watching his every move closely.

" Riddhima' Jitna pyar maine tumse kiya hai'Utna shayad he tumse koi kar paye' I know'You're happy with Sid now and he's everything for you, but what about me?! Ek bhi dafa, tumne mere baare mein kyun nahi socha Riddhima? Tumhara Armaan tumhare bina 'Uska kya astitva hai' Armaan bina Riddhima aur Riddhima bina Armaan' Yeh kyun hogaya'."

Listening to everything, tears quickly rolled down her eyes, she always knew that he was still not so over Riddhima, her twin-sister, but she never knew it was that serious. She could not believe her ears nor her eyes, everything seemed to fade to black and she felt her world shatter.

Even now he only loves her...What were you thinking? Just because he was hanging around with you or being with you all the time didn't mean he loved you Shilpa... Riddhima is still in his heart...It was all unreal' Everything that he did...You thought it was love, but no...There was never love.

Her cries suddenly became more obvious and Armaan's attention was caught by the noise. He turned around to see what that sound was, heading closer to that tree, but to his surprise no one was there.

" Relax Armaan...Koi nahi hain.... Lagta hain abhi tak tujhe sapne he aa rahe hain'"

He believed that there was no one there and turned around to leave when he stumbled onto something. He immediately looked down was awestruck. He quickly picked it up as he hit his head gently ; trying to convince himself that he is not dreaming. It was that same bracelet in his hand ; with the letter 'S' on it. He quickly looked left and right and saw her running away as he tried to follow, but he was too late. She had already disappeared in her car ; away from him.

Oh no. Shilpa was here and she listened to everything I said? But most of all, she ran away CRYING'Why? No no no. This is not right, I have to find her...I can't just let her cry when she needs me the most right now...In fact all this time, SHE was the one that was always by my side when I needed a friend...She always consoled me when Riddhima...Enough of Riddhima. Everytime I think about her it only hurts me and causes problems. Why am I even thinking about her right now? Why was I talking loudly about her... Shut up Armaan, this is not the time for you to think' Shilpa needs you and I just can't let her cry...But where could she be?

***

" He never cared about me... No matter how hard I tried to make him forget about Riddhima...Despite all my efforts...It was all uselss'" Shilpa was in shock and she did not realize that the water was up till her knees now. She was much too focused on what happened. It was completely justified for her to behave in this way after what happened.

***

Armaan quickly headed towards his car too and immediately started driving. He knew where she would be because she had shared almost everything with him. He probably knew her more than she knew herself. Armaan had never been so scared and impatient before except for Riddhima. But this time, the feeling was even more different, it was way deeper. Maybe because of the strong and deep friendship they shared. But if it was all just friendship, why did he care that much? Why could he not bear to see her cry and why was he still driving madly along the road just to find her.

Shilpa I swear agar tumhe juch hogaya to main apne aap ko kabhi maaf nahi kar paonga'Riddhima ko to main kho he chuka hoon par tumhe kho nahi sakta. Kabhi nahi.

A tear rolled down his eye, but he never bother to wipe it away because he knew he could not even waste one second as time was running short and he had to find her as soon as he could.

***

Shilpa on the other hand was almost completely drenched as the water had reached up to her stomach. She could feel the cool water along her skin making her tremble, but all that was nothing compared to the pain she felt.

It was all uselss...Nothing...There was never love...Love is not meant for you...Ever since the beginning your own mom left you in an orphanage...She never even told you that you had a sister until the day you suddenly saw her with Riddhima...The only reason you loved kids and helped them' Just so that they wouldn't have the same circumstances as you did in the orphanage...My whole life was wrong...It was never meant to be then why was I even brought to this world...If I was that unwanted mom should have killed me that instance' Why did she even bother to send me to an orphanage...

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Part 2 is on Page 3

Hina