Pete Doherty's (Real) Prison Diary

Oh boy, this puts Michael Lohan's prison confessions to shame!

Taking drug addiction to a whole new level, Pete Doherty is a mess beyond compare.

Before beginning a 12-month stint in rehab with lots of community service, Kate Moss' former boyfriend served a court-appointed 13 nights in jail, and now he's got a tale to tell.

Yup, the Guardian has just published Doherty's prison diary (and are quick to note, "Peter Doherty did not receive money for this article. The Guardian is making a donation to the Prison Reform Trust.")

Here are a few of our highlights from Pete's "confessions"

January 28
The story starts here with a slap in the mush from some unsympathetic magistrate

January 29
I see paint-cracked walls stained with shite
Long long lock-up days
Cold lonely nights
And I think to myself ... what a wonderful world
I see men touching fists
Saying "watcha bruv"
Screams from below
**** parcels from above
And I think to myself ...
I see my true love

January 30
I think I only needed something to hold on to. It has never been about depravity. It's always been about melody. But melody and I met in many depraved situations.

February 1
Another unthrilling day and my tooth aches like *******. Caught by my own stupidity I'd wager.

Court on the 8th and hoping for bail. Even life without drugs has gotta be betta than this malarkey. Babyshambles all set to take over as well. Won't do it again honest guv ... Oh yes you will Doherty and you know it. Still, if I'm on a DRR [drug rehabilitation requirement] and being tested there ain't no way round it I suppose. Get to grips with the idea that it is eating away at your money, your love and your life.

February 2
They could so easy take the time and space here and now to make a fine example of me. Many are in the same position I'm sure and worse.

I'll do my hair a-while, and even make my bed. Top bunk, yellow fire blankets aplenty coz I've been on the lookout see. Even nabbed a rare old prison shirt off a passing trolley, a boiled egg and a nice blue prison vest.

February 3
Things that break up the day in fits and starts: food, medication, showers, a game of pool if you're lucky, walking in circles round the yard. A legal visit, or any visit. I'm doing 10 press-ups at a time, not with great ease at the moment ... I'll come out of here fitter and stronger than in a longer time. Later that morning ... Shot a few rounds of pool including a thrashing by one of the nurses.

This is the largest prison in the country and in some ways one of the most modern. I've certainly never come across anywhere as clean or spacious as this.

February 5
For my own sake - because it feels like they have the power to cut off my head - I must become a hero, organise my life and obtain from it what they deny me. If I live, in order to continue to live with myself, I must have more talent than the most exquisite poet.