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{{{Date extended}}}
This topic will close on the 10th of September 2008.
1)
Maine kaha ''DILRUBA'',
Usne kaha ''ICECREAM KHILA'',
Maine kaha ''PAISE NAHI'',
Usne kaha ''AISE NAHI'',
Maine kaha ''MEHANGAYI HAI'',
Usne kaha ''JA TU MERA BHAI HAI''.
2)
Teacher: Are you good at math?
Pupil: Yes and no
Teacher: What do you mean?
Pupil: Yes, I'm no good at math!
3)
Lady Doctor: Tum roz subah clinic ke bahar khade ho kar auraton ko kyon ghoorte ho?
Man: Ji, aap hi ne bahar likha Hai: Auraton ko dekhne ka samay 9am-11am.
4)
Do U know the full form of COLLEGE- C-Come,O-On, L-Lets, L-Love, E-Each,G-Girl, E-Equally. .....Thats why boys go to college regularly... .
5)
On walking into the factory, the MD noticed a young guy leaning against the wall, doing nothing.
He approached the young man and calmly said to him, "How much do you earn?"
The young man was quite amazed that he was asked such a personal question, he replied, none the less, "I earn $2000.00 a month, Sir. Why?"
Without answering, the MD took out his wallet and removed $6000.00 cash and gave it to the young man and said, "Around here I pay people for working, not for standing around looking pretty! Here is your 3 months salary, now GET OUT and don't come back".
The young man turned around and was quickly out of sight.
Noticing a few onlookers, the MD said in a very upset manner, "And that applies for everybody in this company".
He approached one of the onlookers and asked him, "Who's the young man that I just fired?" To which an amazing reply came of, "He was the pizza delivery man, Sir...!"
6)
Who is more satisfied, a man with a million dollars, or a man with six children?
The man with six children. The man with a million dollars wants more.
7)
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains,because the average man can see better than he can think
8)
A 50-ish man is driving on a slow highway in the middle of the night. He has a flat tire. He gets out of his car and is changing his tire, when out of the blue, another car pulls up behind him.
He thinks "That's nice. Someone is stopping to help me."
The guy gets out of his car, walks to the front of the other car and lifts the hood.
The owner says: "What the hell are you doing?"
The other guy replies: "Well, I see you're stealing the tires,. so I'm taking the battery!".
9)
Husband asks, Do you know the meaning of WIFE.
It means...Without Information Fighting Everytime!
WIFE satys No, it means -
With Idiot for Ever
10)
knock knock
huz there??
i love
i love who??
i dont know you tell me..
11)
Raj and Ravi were getting ready for the company awards dinner for the best salesman.
Raj was in the running to win an award that evening and wanted to make sure he looked his best when he claimed his prize.
He felt his luck was with him and was sure to win.
He stood in front of the mirror to fix his tie but the mirror was crooked, so he reached over to straighten it out and it came crashing down on the floor.
"Oh no," said Raj. "Now I am going to have seven years bad luck."
"Nonsense," said Ravi. My uncle once broke a mirror and he didn't have seven years bad luck."
"Really?" said Raj, feeling much better knowing that.
"Yeah really," said Ravi. "He died that day."
12)
A man went to a coffee shop with his wife to have some hot coffee.
He drank all his coffee very quickly eventhough his tongue felt being burnt; while the wife was drinking it slowly.
Man: Drink it fast.The coffee will become cold!
Wife: So what??
Man: STUPID!Look at the Menu Card. It says,
"Hot coffee - Rs 10,
Cold Coffee - Rs 30"
13)
Johnny Mera Naam
Piya Ka Ghar
Choukee No. 11
Teesri Manzil
China Town
Bombay
Date: Nav Do Gyarah
My Dear 'Anamica':
You must be surprised to receive this 'Prem Patra' from me. Let me make my 'Pahechan' to you as 'Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge'. Though I am an 'Awaara', I am also your 'Deewana'.
I am making you a 'Prarthna' to enter my 'Zindagi' as a 'Priyatama'. Even though I do not have any 'Sambandh' with you, I still consider you as my 'Dream Girl' with 'Lal Dupatta Malmal Ka'. There are only 'Do Raaste' left for me. One is to get your love by 'Tyag' or to go the 'Rangeela' way.
Wouldn't you like to be 'Mere Jeevan Saathi' as you are 'Lakhon Mein Ek'? I also hope that you will 'Guide' me in 'Bahar' as we are made for 'Ek Duje Ke Liye'.
We will live in 'Naya Zamana' where we will have a 'Suhana Safar'. In this 'Himalay Ki God Mein', our 'Bandhan' is going to be tied with 'Preet Ki Dor'. I hope that we will have nothing but 'Anand' in 'Ye Dillagi'.
Aren't you bored of 'Akele Hum Akele Tum' life? Let this 'Baazigar' be your 'Boy Friend' and we start 'Pehli Mohabbat'. This 'Chahat' is going to lead to a 'Milan' where you are going to call me everyday for 'Aao Pyar Karen'.
Now, 'Phir Kab Miloge' as 'Tumse Accha Kaun Hein'? As you know my love is 'Himalay Se Uncha' and hopefully our 'Mulakat' will be 'An Evening in Paris'. 'Aa Gale Lag Jaa'!
'Hum Aapke Hain Koun…?'
'Prem Pujari'
14)
Three guys are in a plane, lost in fog, and they don't know
where they are. The first guy says "I'll find out" and puts
his arm out the plane, then brings it back in and says
"We're just over Paris"
"How do you know" ask the others
"Well I've just felt the top of the Eiffel tower."
Later on the second guy tries and says "We just flew over London"
"How?" asks the others
"Well I've just felt the top of Big Ben"
Still later on the last guy tries it, puts his arm out the
plane, and says to the others "We have just flown over Glasgow."
"How do you know that?" comes the reply.
"Because some has just stolen my watch"
15)
Want to propose a girl
Just do it - Nike
Before going to propose to a girl
Believe in the best - BPL.
If you are hesitating before proposing to a girl
Vicks ki goli lo kich kich door karo - Vicks.
If you are going to propose to a girl
Chances are 50-50 - Britannia.
If a girl slapped you when you proposed to her
Take it easy - Limca.
Girl says NO !
Jor ka jhatka dhire se lage - Mirinda.
Those who succeed in love always say
We dream because we do - Daewoo.
If some one wants to write a love letter to his girlfriend
Likho script apna apna.- Rotomac.
If you love someone
Go get it - Visa power.
Boy riding a bike with neighbor's girl
Neighbors envy owner's pride - Onida.
Not satisfied with your date
Yeh dil mangey more - Pepsi.
A guy having a number of girl friends
The Complete Man - Raymonds.
A smart girl having a number of boyfriends
Yeh hai hamara suraksha chakra - Colgate.
For those lost in love
Har shaam ka sathi main aur mera - Bagpiper Whisky.
For a guy or A gal who hasn't yet found one
Dhoondte rehe jayo ge - Surf Exel
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Happy Voting 😉😆
-Jokes Section Development Team-
