Originally posted by: sunshining
................ On a serious note, it is scary how many girls leave homes to get duped. Wish there was more focus on how Bhagya fought her way to where she is.
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(sorry for cutting -- just wanted to respond to that thought)
Bhagya is super lucky that she didn't get trafficked. Many young girls and women are often sold into prostitution by their partners (husbands, boyfriends). In a way, Bhagya is lucky that she got dumped at the bus stop.
In regards to how girls get duped -- there are several factors at play.
One is the home environment. If it is very unhappy or the girl has a difficult relationship with her folks or feels unwanted, she desperately looks for love. The girl does not realize that she is looking for validation, affection and not actually romantic love. However, because she is so unhappy, the first guy that shows some attention on her, she falls hard. She does not pay any attention to red flags and any potential issues are explained away. Only when she is stuck in a bad relationship/marriage for a long time does she realize that she made a mistake. There was perhaps never love even on her side. Just infatuation and misdirection. I remember reading a post in Reddit where a woman said the very type of atmosphere/home she wanted to avoid (her parents), she has ended up in a similar situation with her husband.
In Bhagya's case, she was loved because she calls her first love as appa. So she it wasn't a case where she was unhappy at home.
The second factor is the lack of development on emotional intelligence. Parents are so focused on studies but they don't teach the children about life, people and the world. This makes them easy pickings for criminal, bad folks because these young adults have never really experienced or even aware of the bad side. They don't have the kind of street knowledge or analytical skills to read people. Also, parents not being open to their children about attraction and infatuation means that many don't know the difference between attraction, infatuation and love. No one teaches them about how to handle rejection, how to handle relationships with the opposite gender -- all of these re immense life skills that needs to be taught by parents but instead the focus is solely on marks.
So this means book smart people can be shocked by the selfishness of humanity because they are not prepared. That is what we see with Bhagya. Why on earth is she shocked when these kind of stories you hear all the time? She obviously does not watch crime patrol. 
There is also the peer pressure. Every person is dating, flaunting their relationship and so you too want to experience romantic love. You want to be able to show off to your friends that you too are good looking enough to snag someone. There are plenty of folks who get into a relationship for that very reason. It is possible that Bhagya was a romantic and was influenced by peer pressure -- she really struggles with the idea of real vs reel romance and wondering what she can and cannot trust.
The third factor is that when parents have a more open relationship with their children, they can do a kind of love cum arranged marriage where they vet the boy and the family. There is room then for discussion and to discern if the guy is really good or bad.
I will give an example of someone I know. The girl was dating a moron and she introduced to her folks. They were not happy with the guy's character and told her that this is a bad idea but they cannot stop her if that is what she wants. The guy meanwhile showed his true colours and she broke it off.
So when there is space for discussion, the nature of the person is revealed. If Bhagya's parents had been open to meeting the guy, they would have automatically pointed it out that he is only after money and expects to use her as a meal ticket to get settled. So her parents also goofed up by not doing their work. Instead, they dismissed the guy without meeting him and wanted her to get married to someone of their choice -- this only led to her thinking filmi style and running off.
Edited by mango.falooda - 2 months ago
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