Anupama putting her sins on others head - Page 4

Why should anupama set her priority who is anuj to ask anupama when to how to meet her children whether npt meet her children Why he is making decision

And anupama never ask anuj to involve in shah matter he himself involve I. Shah matter

Originally posted by: surabhi01

Of course anupama will go to shah house because it was samar wedding .

If u see when anuj went to Mumbai Anupama not a single day she went to shah house ..

.yes only she visit hospital to console her children and visit shah house only for few minutes the MN she come out.

Don’t you found it amusing that whenever Anupama is separated from Anuj she begins to maintain boundaries with shahs too.

First when Anuj left for Mumbai she also didn’t get involved in shah matters that much for whole month. She didn’t go there to for anything when it is not important and when Anuj came back she started her free services again.

Second when Anuj and she got divorced she didn’t even tried to meet her kids or Babuji. But now also when Anuj is back she got normal with all shahs as if Vanraj never banished her from shah house. She is back to catering them leaving everything behind. If in these five years she was ready to maintain boundaries with shah then she can very well stayed with Anuj and adhya without inference of shah. Anuj was not who banished her from kapadiya’s.

Originally posted by: surabhi01

Why should anupama set her priority who is anuj to ask anupama when to how to meet her children whether npt meet her children Why he is making decision

Did he mention not to meet her adult, married, kids? He asked Anupama to maintain healthy boundaries from toxic, abusive Shahs.

And if her skewed up "priorities" are coming at the cost of his family, of course he will ask her to set her priorities right.

Secondly, from when did Leela-Hansmukh, Vanraj, Kavya become her children?

And anupama never ask anuj to involve in shah matter he himself involve I. Shah matter

No she just made it inevitable for him not to be involved.

Only 2 things would happen:

1. She would get abused, he had to step in to bail her out inturn himself get insulted for trying stand up for her.

2. She wouldn't either be available for him and his daughter or if she was physically present, she would mentally most certainly be at Shah House.

Comments

Originally posted by: Snowdrrop

Don’t you found it amusing that whenever Anupama is separated from Anuj she begins to maintain boundaries with shahs too.

First when Anuj left for Mumbai she also didn’t get involved in shah matters that much for whole month. She didn’t go there to for anything when it is not important and when Anuj came back she started her free services again.

Second when Anuj and she got divorced she didn’t even tried to meet her kids or Babuji. But now also when Anuj is back she got normal with all shahs as if Vanraj never banished her from shah house. She is back to catering them leaving everything behind. If in these five years she was ready to maintain boundaries with shah then she can very well stayed with Anuj and adhya without inference of shah. Anuj was not who banished her from kapadiya’s.

Sahi pakde hain.

Even that is wrong telling how to maintain boundaries with children

If any spouse asks the other one ‘who are they’ to ask them to set priorities right, they should seriously rethink about the entire relationship.

If one is married, they would know how much having right priorities is a key to a happy healthy relationship.

Anupama did went to shah for once after vanraj discharge from hospital

And even went to shah house for samar wedding even before anuj arrive for samar wedding

Anupama already started ritual in Shah house when anuj was not there in Ahmedabad

Originally posted by: surabhi01

Even that is wrong telling how to maintain boundaries with children

Are Shahs abusive? Including her "kids".

Originally posted by: surabhi01

Anupama did went to shah for once after vanraj discharge from hospital

And even went to shah house for samar wedding even before anuj arrive for samar wedding

Anupama already started ritual in Shah house when anuj was not there in Ahmedabad

I never said anywhere that she should broke all tie with her kids.In Anuj absence in maaya track she gone to shah house for completing rituals of wedding. She didn’t gone there for taking care of baa or Babuji or Pari because they were not her responsibility. That is called healthy boundaries.

After Anuj came back and they united she gone there for cooking and working many times. She was there almost everyday. This is called not maintaining boundaries with them.

There are difference in between maintaining healthy boundaries or interfering in daily lives or completely broken relations.

What Anupama did before Samar wedding was maintaining healthy boundaries. What they done in 5 years leap is completely broken relationships ( because Vanraj didn’t allowed her to interfere and vanished her from Shah house).

And what she done and doing now in interfering in daily life even when she is not welcomed there.

Originally posted by: Dee-Dee

If any spouse asks the other one ‘who are they’ to ask them to set priorities right, they should seriously rethink about the entire relationship.

If one is married, they would know how much having right priorities is a key to a happy healthy relationship.

So true, If here Anuj was spending more time in office or on business trips than he will be the bad husband. People would had asked if he can’t spend time at home and not give time of his wife then why did he got married at the first place. Then anuj would be bad guy. Husband wife relationship made them a unit. If anyone gives more priority to others then this relationship would suffer. Be it wife giving more importance to her family or husband giving more importance to his family. For a successful relationship they have to made them each other priority.

In Anupama and Vanraj marriage Vanraj gave more importance to his family and work . There Anupama also gave more importance to vanraj family and kids that she ignored Vanraj too in the process. In namaste America it was shown that Vanraj used to asked her to come to parties but she were busy in baa Babuji and kids.

In Anupama and Anuj marriage Anupama gave more importance to her ex in laws or so called maika.Because of this both marriage were unsuccessful.