Maa ki mamta - Page 6

Originally posted by: yellomellow

Some people completely missed the point.

It doesn't matter what Abhi did or didn't do. Nor is it about her moving on. Instead of fighting her own battles or actually moving on she used a child to settle scores. Whatever happened between them was between adults, but she willingly and gleefully brought an child into. Just like how Manjiri used Abhi against his father she is doing the same.

Abhi didn't make the decision for them. It was all their choice, but Abhi and Abhir have to face the consequences for a decision made without their knowledge or consent. It's about her and Abhinav's complete disregard for Abhir's feelings. Even now Abhi senses that something is off with Abhir. Whereas, the mother that almost died giving birth to him is more concerned about her husband's feelings. Abhir was close to telling Abhi that he is still looking for his real father, but he ran off to find Ruhi. That seems like a child that is struggling with his emotions. He wants to know and talk about it, but he is suppressing his feelings because his mother told him to. That's gaslighting lol.

Also, not everything is about Abhi, but some people are obsessed with his character.

It's a very common problem in this forum, don't worry😆

Your points are all bang on about Abhi and Abhir suffering consequences of decisions that were made without their knowledge or consent. Akshara did get to have both knowledge and consent when she was given the divorce....so she was able to make decisions for herself based on that. Abhi's right to make decisions regarding his son was snatched away from him and it's beyond hilarious to see people still trying to defend that here😆

Originally posted by: Krinya

I was about to write thr same thing.. what's the ideal age to tell the child ?

Suppose abhir knows abhim is his father and he asks Dr "why aren't you and mummy together ?" , what will his reply be ?

*drumroll * a truckload of lies.

But akshu didnt lie to abhir , she promised him to tell the truth when it's appropriate. We all know abhir will soon know it all. But can a child of 6 yr old understand the reasons ? Abhim must dread that day , he should be thankful abhir knows this much.

Exactly, all of the Goenka kids and Abhinav have been shown to be very good parents. It is Abhimanyu who is entirely unbalanced in his approach to the children because it his emotional volatility that creates constant upsets in all their lives. It is good writing. You see his redemption but also the massive ways he screws up lol

One day he spoils Ruhi because she is his proxy for therapy. Next day, he goes MIA of her presence because spending time with Abhir is more important.

One day he keeps his cool and appropriately accepts Akshara's love for Abhinav, and Abhir's love for his parents. But a couple of days later, Abhir hugs him so he wants him to know the truth despite how disruptive it'd to the kids' lives and psyche.

All parents should remove their kids from toxic households. Kids internalise the gaslighting and toxicity and grow up to be sad or angry adults otherwise.

So +1 to Akshara

I think I’m qualified to answer this question. And I will try to answer it without going into much details.
My now preteen daughter has recently been interested in knowing why her parents are divorced. It’s been seven years since the divorce. She started asking me about it around the age of 10ish. I have tried to answer her questions to the best of my abilities and honesty. I gave her answers that she could understand at her age, without placing blames on either one of us. Of course when she is a little older and mature, I will open up more to her and will be able to tell her the exact reason! I Hope that she will be able to understand why her parents weren’t good for each other.

It’s really important to watch how you talk to kids and what you say to them. Their minds are still developing and they may not be able to understand complex situations. ✌🏼❤️

Originally posted by: Krinya

I was about to write thr same thing.. what's the ideal age to tell the child ?

Suppose abhir knows abhim is his father and he asks Dr "why aren't you and mummy together ?" , what will his reply be ?

*drumroll * a truckload of lies.

But akshu didnt lie to abhir , she promised him to tell the truth when it's appropriate. We all know abhir will soon know it all. But can a child of 6 yr old understand the reasons ? Abhim must dread that day , he should be thankful abhir knows this much.

Originally posted by: OnTheBlock

This is picked up from google since that's difficult to do that on one's own nowadays. But it's comprehensive and I love that.

"Spousal abuse, also referred to as domestic violence or intimate partner violence, is a behavioral cycle that involves emotional, physical, or sexual violence inflicted on an individual in a domestic context, such as cohabitation or marriage. Anyone can be a victim, regardless of race, gender, age, sexual orientation, or economic background.

The consequences of spousal abuse extend beyond perpetrators and victims, affecting their immediate family, friends, and communities. Children witness spousal abuse, neighbors may be pulled into the violence, the abused may withdraw from family and friends, and so on. Spousal abuse goes beyond the walls of any one person’s home.

WHAT IS SPOUSAL ABUSE?

Spousal abuse, a more narrowly defined version of domestic violence, entails a variety of mechanisms employed by one partner to control or manipulate the other partner. One partner may be the sole abuser, or in some cases both partners actively abuse each other in one or more ways. Spousal abuse can be physical, sexual, or psychological in nature.

PSYCHOLOGICAL EFFECTS OF SPOUSAL ABUSE

Violent relationships usually undergo a cycle that can be difficult to recognize, but has clear psychological effects on the abused partner. It often begins with tension, arguments, threats, and anger. These behaviors and emotions escalate in the relationship and are usually followed by a violent incident that can be physical, emotional, or sexual. Afterward, the abuser will often make attempts to apologize, make excuses, or try to reconcile the relationship. There may be a period of calm, and then the cycle repeats itself. This cycle of abuse often worsens over time and can lead the victim to experience:

Intense fear

Low self-worth

Anxiety

Depression

Withdrawal from family, friends, and relationships outside the home

Posttraumatic stress (PTSD)

Suicidal thoughts and tendencies

Emotional numbing or detachment

Inability to sleep well"

Basically it's WHITE DAY from a psychological point of view and what Akshara went through since then.

People don't throw the word 'abuse' just like that. Treating your miscarrying wife like dirt, with no dignity and letting your family throw her around like a ragdoll and spew absolute filth is ABUSE. On top of that, add more emotional upheaval to all her already scarred psyche by throwing divorce papers at her.

Hi Guys Mickey here relationship expert.

Quick Query does Akshara leaving Abhimanyu for a year without telling him why and how.

During which he clearly developed insomnia, anxiety disorders.

Falls under the spousal abuse?

Asking for a story 🤓📰

Originally posted by: yellomellow

Some people completely missed the point.

It doesn't matter what Abhi did or didn't do. Nor is it about her moving on. Instead of fighting her own battles or actually moving on she used a child to settle scores. Whatever happened between them was between adults, but she willingly and gleefully brought an child into. Just like how Manjiri used Abhi against his father she is doing the same.

Abhi didn't make the decision for them. It was all their choice, but Abhi and Abhir have to face the consequences for a decision made without their knowledge or consent. It's about her and Abhinav's complete disregard for Abhir's feelings. Even now Abhi senses that something is off with Abhir. Whereas, the mother that almost died giving birth to him is more concerned about her husband's feelings. Abhir was close to telling Abhi that he is still looking for his real father, but he ran off to find Ruhi. That seems like a child that is struggling with his emotions. He wants to know and talk about it, but he is suppressing his feelings because his mother told him to. That's gaslighting lol.

Also, not everything is about Abhi, but some people are obsessed with his character.

Am sorry, what?

The whole premise hinges on what Abhimanyu did on white day and everything that's happened post leap is the consequences of his own actions.

What Abhimanyu did IS THE NUMBER ONE thing that matters. His behavior made Akshara leave, stay far away and raise her kid away from him and ALSO HIDE THE TRUTH about his biological father.

What Abhimanyu is going through right now, him being deprived of his biological son's love and 6 years is the consequence of his own actions. Not anyone else's.

And Akshara is using a child to settle scores? Really? So she has no actual reason to keep her son away from Abhimanyu? Sure.

Guess everything was great between Abhira and one find day Akshara had a dream about Kasauli and just dumped Abhimanyu and left. Nothing happened to her.

If this was some petty marital squabble, it would make sense to say Akshara was wrong keeping Abhir away from Abhimanyu and trying to settle scores but white day is more than enough reason to protect her son from the Birlas for eternity esp Abhimanyu and Manjiri.

The sad part is the show will never really acknowledge what actually went down on that day and they wont make Akshara tell Abhir the whole truth either.

And someone said Akshara is punishing Abhimanyu for his husband mistakes and that shouldn't impinge on his dad rights.... oh one wishes Akshara would punish Abhimanyu for his husband mistakes by filing a domestic abuse complaint. Then the man would be in jail today and never be able to fight his custody battle. He can have his visitation rights.. in jail lmao.

Lastly, implying giving valid criticism of a character's somehow obsession with that character : a very kindergarten retort. If one wants logical answers to a problem then they should be ready to know or be reminded of the source of the problem.

Originally posted by: Sana_a

I think I’m qualified to answer this question. And I will try to answer it without going into much details.
My now preteen daughter has recently been interested in knowing why her parents are divorced. It’s been seven years since the divorce. She started asking me about it around the age of 10ish. I have tried to answer her questions to the best of my abilities and honesty. I gave her answers that she could understand at her age, without placing blames on either one of us. Of course when she is a little older and mature, I will open up more to her and will be able to tell her the exact reason! I Hope that she will be able to understand why her parents weren’t good for each other.

It’s really important to watch how you talk to kids and what you say to them. Their minds are still developing and they may not be able to understand complex situations. ✌🏼❤️

My point exactly. 👆

That akshara is trying to protect abhir ..if she wanted to manipulate him or gaslight him, she could have cried in front of him , narrated the whole story, play victim, just like mummy does to Dr.

Randomly speaking,

Ye jo sach sach sach ki been baj rahi hai, sach is so ugly & shameful that the dr cant confront it...he should dread that day ..like he was a shield to his mother, what if abhir does the same ? Like he started calling his father sir , why shouldn't abhir do it as he grows up and knows the complete truth ? He wouldn't like to show that face to his son..

Originally posted by: chaipaani

Hi Guys Mickey here relationship expert.

Quick Query does Akshara leaving Abhimanyu for a year without telling him why and how.

During which he clearly developed insomnia, anxiety disorders.

Falls under the spousal abuse?

Asking for a story 🤓📰

I have a different query.

When did Akshara ever say in the show that she is hiding the truth to spare Abhir from hating his real father? 😆 Yeh kaunse fantasy episode mein sun liya logon ne? I toh never saw this happening in any scene😆

Her every dialogue has been about hiding the truth cuz Nav will be hurt, he won't be able to live without Abhir etc. etc......where has she remotely said she is trying to save Abhimanyu's image in front of Abhir? 😆

Originally posted by: Deltablues

Exactly, all of the Goenka kids and Abhinav have been shown to be very good parents. It is Abhimanyu who is entirely unbalanced in his approach to the children because it his emotional volatility that creates constant upsets in all their lives. It is good writing. You see his redemption but also the massive ways he screws up lol

One day he spoils Ruhi because she is his proxy for therapy. Next day, he goes MIA of her presence because spending time with Abhir is more important.

One day he keeps his cool and appropriately accepts Akshara's love for Abhinav, and Abhir's love for his parents. But a couple of days later, Abhir hugs him so he wants him to know the truth despite how disruptive it'd to the kids' lives and psyche.

So before I say something let's deal that I am not making comments on any of the other thing you are saying who is right or who is wrong.

Just this part- Abhimanyu isn't a bad parent. He was the only one who realises when Abhir is feeling low. He is not MIA in Ruhi's life. He actually told her to behave nicely I am going out for sometime and he makes sure to video call her daily.

Contrary to popular belief both mothers were more like choose one ruhi or abhir. Ruhi won't adjust and all. We all saw how sweetly he made Ruhi understand and the bond Ruhi and Abhir have now is all abhimanyu.

So he clearly is a good parent. Alot of people when ruhi was showing tantrums judged a six year old girl too blaming it on Abhi but the results are something else.

Both kids are happy, both feels safe with Abhi and share their secrets. Abhir telling him he is not well whatever reason he didn't tell his parents, he did it again when he found about the father thing. He told Ruhi then who feels comfortable sharing it with Abhi not her mom, not her maasi, or anyone.

Abhir told her not to tell anyone yet she called poppy. Coz kids not only love abhimanyu coz he spoils them or anything they feel free and comfortable with him.

This is something even I was wrong initially. And i have no shame to admit that I made a quick judgement initially that he is not a good parent coz he clearly is

Originally posted by: chaipaani

Hi Guys Mickey here relationship expert.

Quick Query does Akshara leaving Abhimanyu for a year without telling him why and how.

During which he clearly developed insomnia, anxiety disorders.

Falls under the spousal abuse?

Asking for a story 🤓📰

I mean he literally divorced her and let his family throw her out. He lost his rights then and there as a spouse.

This is more on that lines of a guilty conscience. Abuse stemming from actions of your own, if you may.

I mean when you have abused your ex wife and then couldn't be bothered about her or her healthy and she doesn't ever want to deal with your abusive ways and family ever again..you are bound to develop a guilty conscience. Still didn't land on her feet and beg for forgiveness though..for being an absolute disappointment of an ex-husband. Should have atleast thanked her for not filing a domestic abuse complaint. Nope. That would've actually made him somehow redeemable. To ask for forgiveness without any motive.

But instead he did what most abusers do the moment he saw an opening.. Beg her to reconcile and to come back to him shamelessly (this is highlighted in the Spousal Abuse post as a trait of the abuser which Abhimanyu fulfills too) ,leaving her family,husband and son... without even fully realizing the depth of his abuse on that day.

Hope you got your answer. Happy to help you out whenever 😆