Originally posted by: Grumpydwarf24
Is it possible in real life? They say one side normally has romantic feelings without the other ever finding out.
I'm bisexual. My best friend is a lesbian. I'm her daughter's godparent. There are things we bond and connect over that she cannot with her wife, like our immigrant heritage, a shared love for funky fermented foods that have acquired tastes, being raised by strict parents, love for Taylor Swift, etc. We will do road trips or vacations together every few years. Her wife and I are on great terms. She treats me like part of the family. There is no jealousy or drama or that bullshit.
Two of my other closest friends are guys. One of them has a smoking room in his house. Sometimes we hang out there for hours together there, while his wife does things around the house. No big deal; we're talking mostly about Axis and Allies strategy, Dungeons and Dragons, scenic train routes, and that sort of thing.
I won't claim that we're hot or something, but we're average people with average attractiveness. And it is completely normal to have close platonic friendships. Just because you're attracted to a gender doesn't mean you will be attracted to every single member of that gender or that you cannot have meaningful platonic friendships.
I have also known gay men, some of who I've considered super hot, who have been roommates or best friends. Queer folks often have close-knit platonic friend groups as well. And some are ridiculously hot. Straight women also hang out with ridiculously hot gay men as friends. They may find them attractive or even have a crush. But the friendship stands out and lasts.
But for some reason, straight men and straight women struggle to have friendships in the real world. It is either marred by one person's unrequited attraction, or their significant others find it too weird and are exceptionally jealous. Society also assumes that straight men and women hanging out has to be more than friendship. Two lesbians or two gay dudes who are dog-tired will not think twice about crashing on the same twin bed. There is nothing to think twice over. But two straight men or a heterosexual pair will hem and haw about the sleeping arrangements.
This is why sometimes we say "are the straights ok?" Seems like straight people tend to be hung up on a lot of things.
It is rare that men and women are friends in real life. But it is not impossible. It can actually be a good and healthy thing to share friendship and get perspectives with people who are different from you. From my observation - the more conservative society and individuals - the rarer opposite gender friendship; consequently - the more liberal society and individuals - the more possible opposite gender friendships are.
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