papaG & yuvi: adult child-parent conflict; am my own person - Page 8

Originally posted by: Sudharies

Parents worrying over their kid's future, and scolding them for their failures or inabilities is so common. Especially if the parents have different types of kids, one a lot smarter and the other one not so smart, the comparison and Conflicts starts between parents and kids.

Generally parents never wish ill for their kids even if they have issues. But when the parent is like Mr.Garewal here, it's quite hard to understand them and get their approval or appreciation in anything. Since Mr.Garewal seems to be too adamant in his nature and it takes Mrs.Garewal's insistent words to bring some sense into his thick head.

I'm glad that she is still trying to put some sense into him. Fathers can be a bit one sided, like unintentionally that is. They can't be that perceptive as mothers are when it comes to their grown children. The gap especially between a son and father is always filled by the mother.

The kids can try to earn the love and approval, but eventually they lose the motivation due to various scenarios.

Fathers might realise pretty late, when the damage has been done. What the fathers can do is, instead of seeing them as a parent, they should put themselves in their shoes as a son and think.

I feel for Yuvraj. He is just lost, due to his father and wife, who never gave him his due respect and appreciation. He needs some love, appreciation and right guidance.

that is a great point -- characters like papaG are hard to understand. I remember in the beginning few episodes, most had such a negative view of him and I was like lone ranger. 😆 for me, he seemed such a clear character because I have seen such people in life. while we as the audience get the priviledge of seeing his private side where he shares his burden with mamaG, without those scenes, papaG is a very difficult person to read and understand. it is easy to think that such a person has only hate for us if they are constantly criticizing -- that is what is happening with yuvi.

like you said, we all have limits and at some points, kids stop trying to earn the love and approval and they lose motivation. when that happens, the family conflicts intensifies as neither side even attempts to understand each other. instead, we all curl into our own hurts. so it will be interesting to see where they go with this family....

Originally posted by: Lethamukund

Conflicts can not be resolved in a single lecture and there is no magic wand that you just make the conflicts vanish away in a moment.

PapaG has to accept that each individual is unique and no one is wrong or right. For that he has to accept that he can not set targets for Yuvi and Yuvi has to achieve those targets. Yuvi should be let loose to take his own decisions, work things on his own way and learn from his failures and success. Yuvi also should be ready to come out of PapaG's shadow and do things on his own and take responsibility of his failures and success.

having said, it is not very easy task.And MamaG and Reet has to play active role in this. Here we can not expect Reet to act wisely so soon.

So it is a two way process, involving the whole family. Hope the makers take it up and execute it right

fingers crossed! in many serials, they introduce interesting themes and conflicts and then totally drop the ball. instead they hurriedly wrap it up in the most stupidest of ways that makes zero sense even in a filmi dramatic way. so am keeping my expectations low and seing how it goes.

Originally posted by: mango.falooda

we continued to have some interesting scenes this week but I was sick with flu and so no energy to really post. but wanted to post some thoughts even if a bit late.

did anyone else wonder why the toy happened to be monkey?

right when we see it, along with papaG, we also assume that it belonged to aditya and now, it will go to aarav. instead, it turned out to be yuvi's old toy and somehow papaG had mixed up his memories. all his good memories he associates with aditya, his favoured son, and he has forgotten the fun he had with yuviraj.

at the same time, aarav's nickname is monkey -- was that something she gave or aditya? why monkey?

in friday's episode, we get mamaG trying yet again to gently tell papaG that he can't expect yuvi to behave a certain way. papaG and aditya were very alike and so they processed and executed things in a similar fashion. yuvi has his own way of doing things. as mamaG says, just different but not wrong. but then papaG reveals that he is very anxious about the future and what will happen to yuvi after his time -- mamaG is not able to say anything.

as I was thinking this weekend, I wondered how much of our conflicts in family arise out of anxiety and worry over the future. a friend is wading through the arranged marriage market for her daughter and she was laughing that it is chaos at home -- the parents (she and her husband are worried), the grandparents (in-laws) are worried and then you have the daughter who is also worried.

so how do we react when we are anxious about the future? do we get hyper critical and blame? do we find fault in everything? in our frustration, do we make things worse?

yuvi is voicing out his frustration more and more because it seems nothing he does meets his father's approval. is there anything he can do to lessen papaG's anxiety? or is anxiety something papaG has to figure out how to deal as a parent? what do folks think?

Originally posted by: Prateeksha19

mig8 not be 100% just my interpretation. yuvraj mi8 be like aadis best friend and almost like his child n all elder kids in family treat their younger siblings like their own property n as katha said aadi missed yuvraj a lot.now aadi mi8 be calling aarav monkey to fill the void he felt when he left garewals so that aarav when grows up becomes like a friend to him the way yuvraj was in his childhood . Here monkey aarav is a friend with papag as they share from cricket to movies everything. So aarav with be the common thread connecting papag n yuvraj whats say ?

we all have been getting annoyed by katha constantly calling him monkey but if that was adi's nickname for aarav because he missed yuvi -- ooh I like!

so far, we have seen papaG and aarav interacting but not really with yuvi. would love to see these also bond and interact. in many of our indian languages, the word/s for uncle (as well as aunt) means they are our second parent. since katha is very keen on aarav having good male presence in his life, it would be lovely for him to bond with yuvi as a second father/parent. that would be so cute to watch

Originally posted by: mango.falooda

we all have been getting annoyed by katha constantly calling him monkey but if that was adi's nickname for aarav because he missed yuvi -- ooh I like!

so far, we have seen papaG and aarav interacting but not really with yuvi. would love to see these also bond and interact. in many of our indian languages, the word/s for uncle (as well as aunt) means they are our second parent. since katha is very keen on aarav having good male presence in his life, it would be lovely for him to bond with yuvi as a second father/parent. that would be so cute to watch

Originally posted by: mango.falooda

we continued to have some interesting scenes this week but I was sick with flu and so no energy to really post. but wanted to post some thoughts even if a bit late.

did anyone else wonder why the toy happened to be monkey?

right when we see it, along with papaG, we also assume that it belonged to aditya and now, it will go to aarav. instead, it turned out to be yuvi's old toy and somehow papaG had mixed up his memories. all his good memories he associates with aditya, his favoured son, and he has forgotten the fun he had with yuviraj.

at the same time, aarav's nickname is monkey -- was that something she gave or aditya? why monkey?

in friday's episode, we get mamaG trying yet again to gently tell papaG that he can't expect yuvi to behave a certain way. papaG and aditya were very alike and so they processed and executed things in a similar fashion. yuvi has his own way of doing things. as mamaG says, just different but not wrong. but then papaG reveals that he is very anxious about the future and what will happen to yuvi after his time -- mamaG is not able to say anything.

as I was thinking this weekend, I wondered how much of our conflicts in family arise out of anxiety and worry over the future. a friend is wading through the arranged marriage market for her daughter and she was laughing that it is chaos at home -- the parents (she and her husband are worried), the grandparents (in-laws) are worried and then you have the daughter who is also worried.

so how do we react when we are anxious about the future? do we get hyper critical and blame? do we find fault in everything? in our frustration, do we make things worse?

yuvi is voicing out his frustration more and more because it seems nothing he does meets his father's approval. is there anything he can do to lessen papaG's anxiety? or is anxiety something papaG has to figure out how to deal as a parent? what do folks think?

This show deals with many real life issues .

The PapaG and Yuvi are not far from us , we can experience it at our homes or even self experience.

Every individual is different , and comparing us to others make us feel very low . Siblings are also two different human beings they can be very contrast to each other .some may be responsible and some can be easy going .But they have their own way of dealing things . Elders cannot expect them to behave the way they want .

Its often taken for granted that i scold my kid for their betterment and not because i dont love him nor because i am his enemy .This is most common dialogue i have heard from many parents .

Their anxiety about our future is valid its can be understood but things can be done in a better way .Just few good words of appreciation along with a correction, or a pat on the shoulder and respecting the person can all bring a good change .A healthy conversation .

Kids often express their dislike after a point of time then leads to arguments and conflicts and to the point where parents and kids stop communicating .That is so bad situation. Afterall we didnt grow up to become enemies to our parents !!!!

Here i just love how Kathaa pointed out the need for making PapaG realise to acknowledge Yuvi and stop searching Adi in him .Even though mamaG also know there is a issue she was just not interfering in their matters . Now that she has an eye opener she is ready to play the mid man .

That is what we lack most of the time in real life . Mother in some cases become only a good wife and forgets to understand the kids feelings when they grow up.

I love mamaG character she is a good women with good heart .

( Dont know how will react to such situations when we will have to face it in real life ....😀🤫 )

Thankyou Mango for the tag and also you are very good at expressing with words and observing relationships 👍👍🔥

Also i think Araav nick name might be kept by Adi as he was missing his younger brother ...

Originally posted by: G259

Thanks for the tag😊.But I have never analyzed these conflicts or thought about the relationships in deeper sense.So,I think I would just read everyone's discussions here😅.

Same here.

I also read everyone's pov to improve my knowledge about human behaviour.

I don't understand complicated relationship. problem hi samajh mei nahi aati toh analyze kya hi karoon.

eg. i don't understand nighty mama's character. what's her problem in life? why can't she be happy and let others be happy can't she just accept the reality? why it's such a big deal for her?

Originally posted by: Fruitbae

This show deals with many real life issues .

The PapaG and Yuvi are not far from us , we can experience it at our homes or even self experience.

Every individual is different , and comparing us to others make us feel very low . Siblings are also two different human beings they can be very contrast to each other .some may be responsible and some can be easy going .But they have their own way of dealing things . Elders cannot expect them to behave the way they want .

Its often taken for granted that i scold my kid for their betterment and not because i dont love him nor because i am his enemy .This is most common dialogue i have heard from many parents .

Their anxiety about our future is valid its can be understood but things can be done in a better way .Just few good words of appreciation along with a correction, or a pat on the shoulder and respecting the person can all bring a good change .A healthy conversation .

Kids often express their dislike after a point of time then leads to arguments and conflicts and to the point where parents and kids stop communicating .That is so bad situation. Afterall we didnt grow up to become enemies to our parents !!!!

Here i just love how Kathaa pointed out the need for making PapaG realise to acknowledge Yuvi and stop searching Adi in him .Even though mamaG also know there is a issue she was just not interfering in their matters . Now that she has an eye opener she is ready to play the mid man .

That is what we lack most of the time in real life . Mother in some cases become only a good wife and forgets to understand the kids feelings when they grow up.

I love mamaG character she is a good women with good heart .

( Dont know how will react to such situations when we will have to face it in real life ....😀🤫 )

Thankyou Mango for the tag and also you are very good at expressing with words and observing relationships 👍👍🔥

Also i think Araav nick name might be kept by Adi as he was missing his younger brother ...

Wow..

very nicely explained.👍🏼

Originally posted by: Nabni_blr31

Same here.

I also read everyone's pov to improve my knowledge about human behaviour.

I don't understand complicated relationship. problem hi samajh mei nahi aati toh analyze kya hi karoon.

eg. i don't understand nighty mama's character. what's her problem in life? why can't she be happy and let others be happy can't she just accept the reality? why it's such a big deal for her?

even I don't understand nightie mama. 😆

I also grew a lot as a person after watching serials and seeing everyone's comments. participating in kdrama forums over the years was such an eye opener for me -- just learning that there are different ways to perceive the same scene and character itself was shocking for me. so many points and angles I never ever thought of and so many emotions I came to understand during these conversations.

thats partly why I like making such essays. you never know how people will respond and it is good to have such conversations as we learn along the way.

as we discuss, we also feel less alone -- lot of times, we will not discuss our family problem (such as a conflict with your parents) with outsiders because of loyalty and wanting to save face. whereas with a serial, we can dissect such things freely because this is just fiction. so it becomes easier to talk about such emotions and realize that people everywhere have problems.

also, it is good to discuss such emotions we find in dramas because in real life, we find it hard to express them as we don't know how. so when we express these feels and learn to find the words to our reaction to the characters and dramas, we get better at communicating.

so watching serials can definitely be education. after all learning about human behaviour is the most important lesson we need.

Originally posted by: Fruitbae

This show deals with many real life issues .

The PapaG and Yuvi are not far from us , we can experience it at our homes or even self experience.

Every individual is different , and comparing us to others make us feel very low . Siblings are also two different human beings they can be very contrast to each other .some may be responsible and some can be easy going .But they have their own way of dealing things . Elders cannot expect them to behave the way they want .

Its often taken for granted that i scold my kid for their betterment and not because i dont love him nor because i am his enemy .This is most common dialogue i have heard from many parents .

Their anxiety about our future is valid its can be understood but things can be done in a better way .Just few good words of appreciation along with a correction, or a pat on the shoulder and respecting the person can all bring a good change .A healthy conversation .

Kids often express their dislike after a point of time then leads to arguments and conflicts and to the point where parents and kids stop communicating .That is so bad situation. Afterall we didnt grow up to become enemies to our parents !!!!

Here i just love how Kathaa pointed out the need for making PapaG realise to acknowledge Yuvi and stop searching Adi in him .Even though mamaG also know there is a issue she was just not interfering in their matters . Now that she has an eye opener she is ready to play the mid man .

That is what we lack most of the time in real life . Mother in some cases become only a good wife and forgets to understand the kids feelings when they grow up.

I love mamaG character she is a good women with good heart .

( Dont know how will react to such situations when we will have to face it in real life ....😀🤫 )

Thankyou Mango for the tag and also you are very good at expressing with words and observing relationships 👍👍🔥

Also i think Araav nick name might be kept by Adi as he was missing his younger brother ...

love how you summed up what a healthy conversation needs to look like 😘 -- we need to have the disciple, constructive criticism as well as words of appreciation when it comes to feedback. it can't be one without the other. if it is too much love, we end up having spoilt brats and later adults who can't hack it at life. if we have too much discipline, we have adults whose spirits are so broken like yuvi that they end up leaning on wrong people (like meera) or habits (like getting drunk) to get them through life.