NOTE: I wanted an emotional conversation between SaiRat in police station. Given their feelings and situation that turned their life upside down, there are chances they will feel low, very low. While Virat might not question Sai's love for him, as he said during their wedding night that her love has ingrained in his being so strongly that it will not leave him easily. Sai's love for Virat will be her weakness, I think. She loves him like she does with her father. She fears that he would get hurt, she fears that she will not be able to make him happy. With her father, there is an unsaid understanding of love that comes with blood relation. She will never have doubts about her father's love for her. With Virat, she fears that she might have failed him. I dont know, I might have understood her wrongly. But as a woman, I can say we think too much in these lines, putting all the blame on us for other's suffering too. Hence tried to capture the moments where they breakdown, unable to see the other suffer. While Sai questions Virat, like she does with her father, Virat understands her turmoil and calms her down, again like her father. I hope I captured their emotions correctly. My ideas here might be very subjective. Please give honest feedback on how their conversation would be.
OS: Do you feel my love!
Sai weeped again silently seeing her husband rush in and out of the main corridor of the police station where she was being held from the morning. It is nearly past noon now. He has come twice to her already and asked if she is hungry and she declined. She knows she is not talking to him as much, something insider her killing her.
"If only I could have been more vigilant", her mind voice spoke again and again. She knows she did not commit any mistake. She remembers vividly every detail of the work she has done today.
"Will Virat sir think I had overlooked the dosage?.", she feared now and then. "Will anyone in the house think I am negligent at my work too?", her fear grew with myriad questions.
"What if I am proven guilty? What will happen to my career? What will happen to Virat sir!", she panicked now.
"Now Jagtap is involved too. He will do anything to torture me. What if he harms Virat sir?", she felt jittery all over, her hands going numb.
"I have put myself and Virat sir in a mess!!", she cried stiffling her nose so as to suppress her sobs. "He would have been much better without me in his life. Not a single day passed after we shared such a blissful experience. I pushed him back to hell.", she struggled to control her negative thoughts.
"I cannot see him like this, being unable to sit calmly even for a minute. Tensed to the core, answering thousand people around him and giving explanations on the allegations levied on me.", she looked at the door where he went inside couple of hours back and not yet returned. "What will he be feeling? He loves me and all I give him is this pain", she wallowed again.
She is crumbling inside and she knows it! She has not done any mistake. One side her career is at stake and the other side her love for this man is giving him only trouble. She wanted to know whether she disappointed him, whether she made him exasperated even for a split second, whether she made him frustrated for a brief moment about the situation she had put him in. She wanted to ask all these questions, but will she be insulting his love for her if she does?!
"I just want him to understand that I love him and that I am sorry to put him through this", she silently prayed to God to make him understand her silences, and not to give up on her even for a second.
Virat stood among a pile of documents that kept on coming in from the morning. He requested the DIG to allot the case to the next most trusted colleague and friend in Nagpur. He is supervising all the documentation before it went to the officer in charge. He was making notes, underlining the crucial points that might help in her full acquittal, not only the bail. The bail hearing is scheduled at 3PM that day after passing through so many bureaucratic hurdles placed by Vittal Mane and his associates. He can make no mistake. He cant let her stay the night here, not after she slept peacefully on his chest the previous night.
"Sai, please trust me and have faith in me that I am trying my best to get you out", he pleaded to his heart where she resides.
He is utterly worried now after knowing the people involved in the case. He is worried for her career. He is worried that though she cannot do such a mistake, the people involved can turn everything against her. He knows he might only get his half-Sai back if the career is taken away from her. He has to make sure she is not only acquitted but also cleared of every charge including the FIR filed against her. Will he be able to reset things back to normal? absolute normal, like this incident never happened!
"I want no less than that Sai, trust me", he begged her silently. "Will you think I am not working enough? I made you wait till 2pm now. in the jail. I could not you out of this mess immediately.", he lamented at his inability to speed up the process.
"Why is she silent and not talking to me?", he wondered. "She didn't even eat anything. I cant see her like this", he spoke loudly nodding his head sideways. "She loved me with all her heart. And I am failing her", he said while the bile rose from his stomach to his throat making him loathe himself. "She would have been better off without me!", he moaned under his gritted teeth. "One day it is my family, one day it is me and one day it is her fate that tied her to me", he cried tears flowing out "I could have taken that bullet and she would have been untouched by all this filth.", Virat broke down and stumbled on the chair nearby taking his head into his hands, unbearable hurt tearing his heart.
Just then his phone rang bringing him back into the real world that is waiting for him to take action, any action in his capacity to get his wife out from jail.
Samrat called to inform that the Judge will be present at 3:30PM in sessions court and that he should bring Sai by 3PM sharp so the lawyer could brief her about the proceedings.
Virat took a deep breath and went to meet his wife with all the confidence he could gather into his being. She was suddenly silent and he knows she is taking the entire guilt upon herself. While going out of his room, he suddenly got an idea. He took the printout of a picture from his phone that had her and her father, Kamal Joshi. He thought it might give her some solace!
"Saii", he called to her back. He sensed she is crying as she wiped her tears before coming towards him.
"Are you ok?", he enquired calmly. "Sorry I was busy inside and did not check the time. I was preparing for the case", he explained which was cut by her.
"I know I have put you into this mess. I know you have not eaten anything from morning.", she reminded him, even though a tinge of happiness danced in her heart. Deriding herself a moment later she asked all the questions which she could not stop from asking.
"Sorry Virat Sir! you had to go through all this because of me.", she said coldly trying to stop her tears. " I know I have not done any mistake, but I should have been careful. Careful because I m no longer an independent woman. Your family's reputation is tied to me, your reputation is tied to me. And I had let everyone down.", she said not meeting his gaze lest she will breakdown.
"I am sorry you cannot be happy with me even for a day", she choked, now looking into his tearful eyes and then looked away. "I am sorry you fell in love with me who gave you only pain", she cried unable to stop her tears now. Slowly holding his collar and pulling him towards her as much as she could from around the steel cage, she leaned into him and broke down "I am sorry I am putting you through this."
Virat understood how she must be feeling. He feared that she would think exactly like this. He knows how fiercely she loves him, and as he had told her before, her love has filled his being with so much warmth that he could feel every bit of her emotion without any explanation. There must be something wrong with his love, that she could not feel it and hence these questions he thought.
Virat tenderly stroked her head before lifting it up. Wiping her tears, he forced her to look at him. He showed the printout that had her father's picture and pushed it into her hand.
"Sai, if your father was around you at this time, will you ask him the same questions?", he asked her calmly. "Will you ask him, whether it is his fault that he fathered you? Will you ask him whether he is disappointed with you? Or will you ask him why he is bending backwards to bail you out?Hmm", he asked her as if making a 5 year old understand the concept of love.
"I might have failed you multiple times before that might have made you question my love for you. I cannot give you the trust or love your father has given you. Nor I can know how it is to love your child.", he smiled slightly when Sai cut him saying she didnt mean to question his love. But he stopped her from giving any clarification and continued.
"Sai, I love you. Please dont ever feel that I will consider anything related to you as a burden. I am doing all this for me, myself and my happiness. If you are happy, I am happy. If you are alive, I am alive. It is as simple as that. So please keep your thoughts aside and be my strength. Don't you bother about anyone or anything. Leave everything on me, trust me like you do with your father. I might not love you like he does, but I will never fail you like he never did.", he said kissing her lightly on her fingers.
"I am sorry Virat sir. I trust you completely. I do. Just that I am worried for you. I cannot see you like this", sai confessed holding his hands and crying into them.
"If you want to see me happy, be happy. Eat something and stay strong. Let us present ourselves confidently in front of the judge. OK", he reassured her. "Let's go now Mrs. Sai Virat Chavan", he said smiling into his tears after seeing her smile confidently. She folded the printout and kept it inside his pocket, and took his hand while they stepped out together.
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