Why is Raghav not at fault? (Choose all WRONG answers!) - Page 2

Originally posted by: BrhannadaArmour

Disclaimer: I haven't watched the show since Sharada said there was no need to report a murder. Nor do I know what I'm saying, in general. I hope you will find this poll ironically funny. It is not meant to make fun of any members for their opinions.

Lol…I went for Vijay and Keerthi curse…they both are such hated character so no one will defend them and going by the chudail reference in the show today, it’s much more likely that they hold the curse responsible than Raghav’s actions…

Originally posted by: BrhannadaArmour

So, Raghav said Pallavi's name, his drinking companion heard him and proceeded to kiss him anyway, and Raghav remembers engaging in something with her, which left him naked, because he thought he was with Pallavi. Based on this, some members are saying that Raghav is not responsible for whatever he did while drunk, that he is a victim, even that the woman who "violated" him should face legal consequences because she was "sober."

I want to respond to that with two facts:

1. Alcohol dispels inhibitions so that you do what you want to do without worrying about morals or consequences. It is not a hallucinogen, meaning, it cannot make you see or feel someone who isn't there.

2. Any sex act takes time and effort. It is not as fleeting as being kissed by surprise.

What this means is that Raghav didn't imagine Pallavi. He just called her name, the way a drunk person asks for someone, and he didn't care that the woman he was seeing and feeling didn't look or feel like Pallavi, because he had voluntarily drunk to the point that he lost his inhibitions. Sorry if this is graphic; he proceeded to touch and be touched, get aroused, remove clothes, continue stimulation, move in rhythm, change position ... he had plenty of time to stop in mid-act and say, this is wrong, I can't pretend you're Pallavi any more. He didn't do that because he had made himself too drunk to care.

If one partner calls out the wrong person's name before or during sex acts, that doesn't make the misnamed partner a predator. She had lost her inhibitions and didn't care if he got her name right. He was awake enough to consent and uninhibited enough to use her in place of his wife, even if her face didn't match, and she was awake enough to consent and uninhibited enough to accept role play.

If Raghav is going to claim that he would only perform such acts with someone that he thought was Pallavi, he deserves to be questioned:

Was your motive to please Pallavi, or only yourself?

After so many months of waiting for Pallavi, did you expect her to approach you so suddenly?

Was the setting - your touch, your scent - as special as Pallavi deserves?

Did you want to talk to Pallavi, or just move your body with hers?

Would Pallavi want you to be drunk when you handle her?

Didn't you want to be fully aware of your intimacy with Pallavi?

Nice questions, unless Raghav was drugged , we can say he did cheat on Pallavi and wasn’t mere victim . Just to safeguard Raghav, or make him victim , Esha can’t be termed as predator just yet. About argument that consent in drunken state isn’t consent , Esha wasn’t sober to consider that. Raghav walked into this situation himself consciously , knowing what Esha feels for him. Drunk into oblivion and committed adultery.

Now I don’t know how will makers go about it , Raghav isn’t even questioning Esha why didn’t she stop or isn’t questioning himself much , so did he realise ever in act that it was Esha and not Pallavi but kept going because it was too late to wait ? It’s itv so such detailing won’t be done, either they did it and he will be labelled innocent because he thought it was Pallavi or they simply didn’t do it as he was too slouched to commit such rigorous activity, someone else removed his clothes.

One things bugs me a lot though ,

Esha is constantly trying ways to be near him, Sunny saw Esha, ACP knows about Esha, so Pallavi has chances of finding out about the situation from third party, but what if Esha left city , what if Sunny/ACP weren’t aware about Esha ? was Raghav going to let Pallavi live life of lies ? If he had no external pressure would he confess or let things go as they are ?

Today he even had audacity to bring girl he slept with home . Does he not feel about his wife ? Got any shame left ?

Somehow his behaviour makes it seem like it wasn’t that big of a deal for him that he cheated , just hurts his own pride to admit that . 😆

I personally won’t be able to forgive Raghav unless he was drugged / nothing actually happened and he was merely framed.

Originally posted by: Couch.Potato

About argument that consent in drunken state isn’t consent , Esha wasn’t sober to consider that.

...

either they did it and he will be labelled innocent because he thought it was Pallavi or they simply didn’t do it as he was too slouched to commit such rigorous activity, someone else removed his clothes.

...

If he had no external pressure would he confess or let things go as they are ?

...

Somehow his behaviour makes it seem like it wasn’t that big of a deal for him that he cheated , just hurts his own pride to admit that . 😆

...

I personally won’t be able to forgive Raghav unless he was drugged / nothing actually happened and he was merely framed.

Excellent points. My opinion about consent is that no means no, but sometimes yes means I guess, or why not? Ideally, everyone would get consent while the partner is sober, but impulsive drunken behaviour is still consent. Here, no one was lying unconscious, and no one was intoxicated to the point of automatism (a valid but extremely rare defense for sexual assault in Canada, where I live), and so both partners are at fault for giving consent, for getting themselves so drunk that they acted on impulse, and for not caring that the other partner's consent was due to loss of inhibitions. None of those sins should be a crime.

Anyone who watches the show may correct me, but Raghav has said that he thought (i.e. assumed, pretended) that Pallavi was with him. So, Raghav has memories of participating in something. To say that he was drugged or framed or nothing happened would be a retcon (retroactive continuity) at this point.

I haven't watched Raghav's behaviour after adultery, so I won't comment on whether he feels penitent or only chagrined, but he is trying to go on without confessing. Raghav generally won't try to undo a mistake until it is demanded of him. When Raghav didn't want to marry Pallavi, he said to Jaya, if you tell me to apologize to Akash and bring him back to Kirti, I'll do that, or if you tell me to shut down my unethical business, I'll do that. Jaya didn't say, I want Pallavi to accept my marriage proposal for you, so do as you offered and then we'll talk. So, Raghav never acted on his own ideas to make amends. He went on with illegal business and trying to control Kirti's social life, until there were terrible consequences, and beyond.

So, the precap tells us that the creatives' choice is: "Raghav's not responsible for what happens when he drinks." How did he manage to let himself be drugged from a shared bottle? As a backup excuse, since Raghav couldn't tell the difference between naked and post-coital in his own body, "Raghav is rusty and needs practice to prepare to satisfy Pallavi."