Do you guys agree with Mumtaz's take on Boney/Sridevi? - Page 7

Originally posted by: BlackWitch

My misery loves your company 😆

Firstly, I didn’t want to leave my Dazzler sea green. But because Tanisha in BB infuriated me, I became red writing posts in that doormat’s honour 🤔

Since I no longer have the patience of the 20 year old me, all I gotta do is wait to get old before I get that damned gorgeous purple 😭 

I can imagine your pain @ Tanisha. I had to pause and roll my eyes at her in one of those Diwali pics too …. 😆

Originally posted by: SmittenKitten

I can imagine your pain @ Tanisha. I had to pause and roll my eyes at her in one of those Diwali pics too …. 😆

Oh, men like this do exist. I dated all kinds of idiots for years before being with my now husband. He is everything to me - my love, best friend, annoying and amazing person I want to kill and kiss everyday 🤭 

He tells me I am beautiful each day and sneakily takes my pictures when I am not looking. I am not a hairy person in general, so whenever I get any hair on my body, he tells me to keep it. He even massages my legs in annoyance while we are arguing our heads off 🤣 

Originally posted by: SmittenKitten

My non-existent husband would land in trouble if his eyes linger for longer than 3 seconds on anyone that's not me. He better know how to make me feel like I'm the queen of his world, heart, brain, body and the whole package .... every minute of the day. That's a real man right there even if he might be non-existent. 

Originally posted by: SmittenKitten

I don't know much about Dharmendra-Hema and what exactly transpired back then but speaking in general, I think prescribing terms for others on what should and shouldn't comprise an "acceptable" reason to cheat or end a marriage or even the "best" course of action for their kids comes across as extremely highhanded and entitled. 

There are marriage vows in place for that purpose and the other partner's love, commitment and trust are also equally compelling forces for most of the people, especially with kids in the picture. Opinions from strangers and other third parties are nothing but meaningless white noise -- they're neither morally binding and nor should anyone impose them on others as such.

I can understand admonishing someone for cheating cuz cheating, breaking vows/promises and hurting another person's trust is never a morally sound decision and that's fairly obvious. But it happens a lot more often than we'd like cuz people are flawed, different and come with their own priorities and thresholds... and what the heck do I know, I haven't cheated. But how the family members come to terms in the aftermath is not anyone else's call but their own, and I wouldn't knock them for choosing the least toxic option for everyone's well-being.

Originally posted by: Talis

I didn't say just financial -  I said financial and emotional for the kids.  You can give your child emotional support outside of marriage.  If you're a parent that's going to cut your child off after you leave you're probably already an emotionally disconnected parent who isn't doing their job.   There is no reason to stay in an unhappy marriage for the kids  - they know it's unhappy.  They hear the fights, they feel the coldness and it affects what they themselves think of relationships and what they expect for themselves.

So he was cheating on her with Hema for 10 years (and before that Mena Kumari and most likely others) but that's a good marriage and marriage he should still be in in 41 years after converting to another religion and marrying another woman after his "kids" were in their 20s.

There is no defined definition that I am expanding.  If you aren't happy in your marriage, if you're just enduring it then for me that's a BAD marriage.  Your spouse doesn't have to beat you, degrade you or even cheat on you for it to be bad.  

Everyone has their own definition of a bad marriage just as they do of marriage itself.  Some people are happy with a spouse who has sex with them once a month, cleans the house, brings home the pay check, gives them children and never speaks to them about anything other than bills and meal plans while having deeper relationships with ones own set of friends.  Some don't care about sexual or emotional  fidelity if  the mortgage and car payments are on time or dinners on the table and the house is clean.  Some people want emotional, intellectual and/or sexual companionship within their marriage.  

Quoting both of you here.

3rd opinions called scientific research has proven time and again that living with father and mother under the same roof is significantly better for the kids. Emotional support outside of marriage is not the same according to the same scientific research. By the way, at least one study I know of included gay couples who adopt. 

This thing about staying together for the kids then becomes more than an argument over ethics. It's science. Some facts might be inconvenient, but they don't go away no matter how hard one might cross fingers and wish for them to disappear.  ie, they don't become white noise. In fact, they grow louder and louder as the adverse impact on the children becomes clearer. 

Calling someone high-handed and entitled for  stating such facts is merely shooting the messenger. 

So yeah, once you have kids, they do come first. Because they are dependent on you. And because millennia of evolution in the animal kingdom has shown us how child-rearing works. And because decades of research has confirmed what most people knew instinctively. 

Making it clear that I'm not talking about toxic marriages, merely the mundane one one or both of spouses may be bored with: and yeah, those parents who put themselves ahead of their own children when they find a better option for a partner do need to be knocked. 

There is a huge difference between the above and those have no option but to walk out. The latter need all the support they can get. 

Re: unhappiness in a merely mundane marriage. The spouses involved, one presumes, are both adults. They are expected to know their responsibilities and modify their behaviors. If they can't zip their mouths even for the sake of their children, once again, they need to be knocked. 

Expanding the definition of a bad marriage to include the boring doesn't change facts. ie, children fare better when parents stay together. Ditching the kids for romance partner vX.0 under the pretext of *oh, it's better for the kids if I'm not unhappy* is mere camouflage for selfish behavior. 

Re: Deol kids being in their 20s when Dharam married Hema. I didn't know that. If that's the case, I withdraw the whole argument.

Her interview is funny and here there she is speaking from heart. 

Didn't Hema and Sri became pregnant before marriage?

Originally posted by: HearMeRoar

L

Re: Deol kids being in their 20s when Dharam married Hema. I didn't know that. If that's the case, I withdraw the whole argument.

Other than Sunny, none of the other 3 were in their 20s. Bobby must have been around 10.

Originally posted by: BlackWitch

Oh, men like this do exist. I dated all kinds of idiots for years before being with my now husband. He is everything to me - my love, best friend, annoying and amazing person I want to kill and kiss everyday 🤭 

He tells me I am beautiful each day and sneakily takes my pictures when I am not looking. I am not a hairy person in general, so whenever I get any hair on my body, he tells me to keep it. He even massages my legs in annoyance while we are arguing our heads off 🤣 

This whole post is so cute. But this is what I'm now picturing:

You yelling at him in an argument as he notices a hair on your leg and starts massaging it while whispering "keep it...keep it" 

Omg! With that kind of an imagination, you need to write a creepy romance novel. It’s a niche audience but you can count on me to spread the word 🤣

Originally posted by: bollyqueen0

This whole post is so cute. But this is what I'm now picturing:

You yelling at him in an argument as he notices a hair on your leg and starts massaging it while whispering "keep it...keep it" 

Originally posted by: Porcupine

Her interview is funny and here there she is speaking from heart. 

Didn't Hema and Sri became pregnant before marriage?

Sri got pregnant before wedding. That too from her so called Rakhi brother Boney behind her best friend's back 🤢

Originally posted by: TrollikaDevi

We really don't know if he did or not.  We have to take their word for it. Insta pics and 'seeming' to be in love needn't have much to do with reality. :)  But good for them if he has been faithful to her. 

People do stop pretending in their 90s and 70s. That's why there are so many grumpy old people. Those people were always grumpy...they just didn't show it before because who likes grumpy people? In old age people stop caring about validation and how they are perceived.