SAAKK|Episode Discussion Thread #74 - Page 47

Originally posted by: mallukumari

The road from Ms. Bhalla to Mrs. Sabherwal will be long! Sounds ominous!!

Tej and Devi are a piece of work. Masters of manipulation. They have such black hearts and have no space for joy. Why even attend the wedding? Their not-so veiled insults about decor, food, bride etc. I’m glad Anokhi is mature enough to handle such situations. And stupid Alok adding insults about working in the canteen. Pay attention to your snooty, spoiled children! Ugh!! I’m curious to know how Tejvi stopped Shaan from leaving with Aastha. Will we finally find out the 25-year-old secret?

Mrs. Bhalla is still the scared mother who just can’t take on society. I’m glad Anokhi knows better at such a young age. Tell a bride to think of her sasuraal as her ghar, but also tell the sasuraal wale to think of the bahu as beti!!

I STAN ANOKHI WHOLEHEARTEDLY!! 😍

👏The way Anokhi stood up for Aastha....I was waiting for Shaurya or Shaan to do it....how foolish of me to forget that our Anokhi doesn’t need anyone to stand up for what’s right!! She said her guru had a higher place than god....clearly levels higher than “Devi”!!

Side note: Shaurya mentioned bache again!! The man’s in a rush!! 😉 Also, Shaurya Sabherwal loves his Anokhi just as she is....no changes necessary....the perks of a love marriage!

Angry side note: What the eff was Tej saying about Sabherwal women only opening their mouth for food? Castrate that man!!😡

Precap: Grihpravesh!! Shaurya, pick up and carry your girl straight to your room!! Don’t stop! Don’t get involved in the drama!

Thoughts?

I have very mixed feelings about today's episode. A lot happened in the episode but in a subtle way that set up the storyline for next phase of the story. I trust the CVs and the show because they have not disappointed us so far by maintaining pace and keeping the show realistic. However they have to carefully balance all elements of the show on an ongoing basis now because it would not take much for the show to become run of the mill saas bahu show and lose its essence.

I cannot believe the nerve of Tejvi- Devi set out to incite Shaurya against his newly wed wife merely seconds after the wedding ceremony was done. I am glad Shaurya continued to support his wife and her ambitions. The worst was them plotting to break the couple up in the wedding hall like they did with Shastha. They ruined Shaan's life and he spent 25 years drowning in alcohol and self pity. They have to know Shaurya loves Anokhi as deeply as Shaan did Astha and he will probably end up broken too. They still want to risk a broken Shaurya despite their so called love for their foster son is incomprehensible to me.

"Ms Bhalla se Mrs Sabarwal banne ka safar bahut lamba ha aur usme bahut kante hai" Tej was not wrong but the bigger question is does Anokhi want to be Mrs Sabharwal or the matriarch of the family in next generation and follow Devi's footsteps or does she want to stay Mrs Shaurya Sabharwal and usher an era of changes in Sabharwal family. My guess is it is latter. I am not surprised at their reaction though, they have maintained ironhold on the Sab family by quashing any voice of dissent amongst the family members ruthlessly. The fact that they have to bear the addition of a nobody like Anokhi to their prestigious family because their foster son and only heir to Sab family fortune is completely whipped for her has to rankle. He has been openly opposing them since he fell in love and they are unable to do anything about it because they need him.

I found it odd that Anokhi was asked to choose where she wanted to live. Was Shaurya really willing to move out of SM if Anokhi chose Shaan's flat and would rest of the family allow that? There was no good answer to the question- if she chose flat, she would be accused to breaking Shaurya away from his family, if she chose SM, not only will she enter a hostile environment to live in, her choice could easily be misinterpreted as her desire to live in riches and luxury that SM has. I guess they wanted to show that Anokhi chose SM to live in because she knew that is what Shaurya would have wanted. In future if they do move out of SM, it would not be Anokhi who broke the family.

I was disappointed in Shaurya and Shaan today. Shaan keeps insisting that Astha come back to Sabharwal house, does he not understand that she is not comfortable there? I am surprised Shaurya did not speak up even once for Astha while Anokhi rushed into it. Anokhi is making the same mistake yet once again- making assumptions and reacting without knowing the facts or understanding the undercurrents. In many household the eldest or the youngest DIL does the grih-parvesh ceremony so it would have been Devi or Kanchan's right. Without knowing how things work in Sab family, it was impulsive for Anokhi to make requests. All she is doing is riling Tejvi and giving them more reasons to hate her. Shaurya would have been the right person to intervene.

The way I see it, there are tons of reasons for the couple to have conflicts as people around them continue to heighten their insecurities and fears.

Anokhi is flawed in the way that she too self righteous and she mistakes her pride as self-respect and balancing act as compromise. She also tends to choose courage over diplomacy and is over-indexed on her education/career. A career and education can give women confidence, knowledge and means to be independent so that she can have a voice and a will but it is not a magic wand that solves all problems. She still will have to compromise and deal with issues in her relationships. I also feel she was not ready for marriage that Shaurya thrust on her because she has given no thought to how her life would change after marriage and how she is going to balance her different roles- she is now a student, a wife, DIL of Sab family and part of SIAC management by being Shaurya's wife.

Shaurya has changed his soch and feels secure in Anokhi's love but I am curious to see what is his breaking point is when and if all his insecurities come back in full form. At what point he starts to feel frustrated that he is being taken for granted by Anokhi or that he is not getting the support that he needs because she she is being too stubborn. Also having kids could be a point of contention for them. Shaurya would want to settle in his family life while Anokhi is too young and focused on her career

I am ready for whatever they dish out as long as the show maintains their essence and uniqueness and continue to sprinkle it with heaps of romance and tight dialogues.

Originally posted by: mallukumari

So I have a hard time comparing Shaurya's misogyny(prejudice against women) to Anokhi's feminism(equality of the sexes). One was wanting to maintain the status quo of patriarchy and the other is asking for equality. Shaurya's is a flaw and Anokhi's is a trait.

As for Anokhi's approach to situations, we won't agree on that since we're different people with different experiences. I can only speak from my point of view and respect yours. I was raised and live in a different country and don't have these separations in my head about my life before and after marriage. I looked at it like I gained more family and never looked at it like I needed to change anything about me. My spouse married me and not necessarily a bahu for his family, just like I didn't marry to have a damaad in mine. I can also have this mindset because I have a very 'eff you' kind of personality.

I watched my mother be that quiet bahu in my dad's family. They might not say anything disrespectful about her, but she didn't gain anything from being submissive. She found herself when we left that for the US and she got to be her true self. I don't live in my sasuraal, so I don't know what that's like or the adjustments that are made. I adjust because more than one person in a space requires it, but not because the other person is my bhabhi, jeeja, saas, or devar!

"Ask forgiveness, not permission" I think this is Anokhi's approach. I may disagree with her in the future, but right now, I'm at her side!

We're just different people Anuja and that's what makes these conversations interesting and keeps the forum buzzing!

I agree with everything you said. I don't expect her to be submissive at all nor should she change because she's bahu. In another post of mine, even I said that she doesn't need to try hard to please each one of her in law's.

It's not about bahu n in-laws. It's about new people. It could be any relation. When you start living together, you do face adjustment issues. I faced them when my cousin brother moved in in my house for a few years, I love him, yet we faced issues n we would over react initially. Later we learnt to take a pause n we could live together in a better way. So it is not at all about male or female, bahu or beti, mauka or sasural... everything I am talking about is only about staying with new set of people!

Coming to the flaws n traits, what you think of as a flaw might not be a flaw for that individual. Like, until anokhi stated her condition, shaurya never thought that his misogyny was a flaw, it was a trait for him. He agreed to change for her, not because he thought it was his flaw. Later he realised he was wrong, that's a different story. All I am saying is, you need to make changes for eachother or the family...and both of you need to do that. And you happily make those changes for the love of your partner or the family members who are good to you. You can't behave rigid if you have to stay in a joint family. You don't get that right just because you are a part of the family now, you need to first earn it.

Originally posted by: Mona_988

Sabh itana real hai😂😂

ghar ki shaadi wali vibes...

Alok chachu behaving like arrogant uncle in the wedding jinko har cheez se prob hoti hai 🤣🤣🤣

Biscuit bhi kha rahe the kami bhi nikal rahe the🤣

Originally posted by: IFLove

I agree with everything you said. I don't expect her to be submissive at all nor should she change because she's bahu. In another post of mine, even I said that she doesn't need to try hard to please each one of her in law's.

It's not about bahu n in-laws. It's about new people. It could be any relation. When you start living together, you do face adjustment issues. I faced them when my cousin brother moved in in my house for a few years, I love him, yet we faced issues n we would over react initially. Later we learnt to take a pause n we could live together in a better way. So it is not at all about male or female, bahu or beti, mauka or sasural... everything I am talking about is only about staying with new set of people!

Coming to the flaws n traits, what you think of as a flaw might not be a flaw for that individual. Like, until anokhi stated her condition, shaurya never thought that his misogyny was a flaw, it was a trait for him. He agreed to change for her, not because he thought it was his flaw. Later he realised he was wrong, that's a different story. All I am saying is, you need to make changes for eachother or the family...and both of you need to do that. And you happily make those changes for the love of your partner or the family members who are good to you. You can't behave rigid if you have to stay in a joint family. You don't get that right just because you are a part of the family now, you need to first earn it.

I so agree with u. Also thought anokhi should not have intervened in astha devi matter since 1st day of marriage. Everything u can't change from day 1 of marriage. She needs to do this patiently

https://twitter.com/Shakhi_haru/status/1409888793658855433?s=20

Where was ACP yesterday?.

Originally posted by: IFLove

I agree with everything you said. I don't expect her to be submissive at all nor should she change because she's bahu. In another post of mine, even I said that she doesn't need to try hard to please each one of her in law's.

It's not about bahu n in-laws. It's about new people. It could be any relation. When you start living together, you do face adjustment issues. I faced them when my cousin brother moved in in my house for a few years, I love him, yet we faced issues n we would over react initially. Later we learnt to take a pause n we could live together in a better way. So it is not at all about male or female, bahu or beti, mauka or sasural... everything I am talking about is only about staying with new set of people!

Coming to the flaws n traits, what you think of as a flaw might not be a flaw for that individual. Like, until anokhi stated her condition, shaurya never thought that his misogyny was a flaw, it was a trait for him. He agreed to change for her, not because he thought it was his flaw. Later he realised he was wrong, that's a different story. All I am saying is, you need to make changes for eachother or the family...and both of you need to do that. And you happily make those changes for the love of your partner or the family members who are good to you. You can't behave rigid if you have to stay in a joint family. You don't get that right just because you are a part of the family now, you need to first earn it.

I agree with you about adjusting to new people. And maybe this is easier to judge because we see all aspects of a story in fiction. In real life, your relationships may be different and so will your circumstances. And I can't speak for joint families since mine isn't that. I also think there is a mentality difference between being a matriarch and a bahu in a family. I didn't have the experience so I can't speak to the bahu role. I've always lived in my own home with my husband, and when the in-laws visit or when my parents visit, it's still our home, our rules.

You can be delusional about your flaws, but it doesn't change the fact that believing men are above women is a character flaw. I'm glad he slowly realized that no matter how righteous he was, Shaurya still had sexist thoughts, like when he yelled at Anokhi for walking by herself at night. We can be pragmatic about the way the world is, but still call out the bullshit, we as women have to deal with.

Making adjustments about diet and making changes to your beliefs are different things to me. I might try new foods on for size but I'm not trying on patriarchy to see if I can fit myself into it.

@bold: your last line amuses me. My sister always says that you don't get respect because you're older, you have to earn it. I find the concept of earning the right to talk and have an opinion interesting, because it's the same words they used to say to a girl, compared to a boy. As if we don't have an innate right.

These are just my opinions. All of these are great words to follow if you're lucky enough to be financial stable and live independently from others. I'm lucky that way so I choose this approach. I can understand that others aren't given the same opportunity, but I hope people are happy in their own choices.

Originally posted by: IFLove

I agree with everything you said. I don't expect her to be submissive at all nor should she change because she's bahu. In another post of mine, even I said that she doesn't need to try hard to please each one of her in law's.

All I am saying is, you need to make changes for eachother or the family...and both of you need to do that. And you happily make those changes for the love of your partner or the family members who are good to you. You can't behave rigid if you have to stay in a joint family. You don't get that right just because you are a part of the family now, you need to first earn it.

Anokhi does not need to be submissive nor does she need to stop supporting the right thing. She just needs to do it with slightly more diplomacy and start listening. But then she is young and has no experience living in joint family where everyone can have different motivations and soch. She will learn and Shaurya is there to help her.

Good news is both of them know and understand what their partner’s desires are and what they need to change. For Shaurya, he needs to continue working in his soch and he needs to set Anokhi free when it comes to her career. For Anokhi, she needs to learn to partner and communicate/listen better and never give up on Shaurya. Everything else is negotiable and will sort itself with time.

Hi guyss! What's going on!

Originally posted by: mallukumari

I agree with you about adjusting to new people. And maybe this is easier to judge because we see all aspects of a story in fiction. In real life, your relationships may be different and so will your circumstances. And I can't speak for joint families since mine isn't that. I also think there is a mentality difference between being a matriarch and a bahu in a family. I didn't have the experience so I can't speak to the bahu role. I've always lived in my own home with my husband, and when the in-laws visit or when my parents visit, it's still our home, our rules.

You can be delusional about your flaws, but it doesn't change the fact that believing men are above women is a character flaw. I'm glad he slowly realized that no matter how righteous he was, Shaurya still had sexist thoughts, like when he yelled at Anokhi for walking by herself at night. We can be pragmatic about the way the world is, but still call out the bullshit, we as women have to deal with.

Making adjustments about diet and making changes to your beliefs are different things to me. I might try new foods on for size but I'm not trying on patriarchy to see if I can fit myself into it.

@bold: your last line amuses me. My sister always says that you don't get respect because you're older, you have to earn it. I find the concept of earning the right to talk and have an opinion interesting, because it's the same words they used to say to a girl, compared to a boy. As if we don't have an innate right.

These are just my opinions. All of these are great words to follow if you're lucky enough to be financial stable and live independently from others. I'm lucky that way so I choose this approach. I can understand that others aren't given the same opportunity, but I hope people are happy in their own choices.

Let's agree to disagree here. Because what I am saying is being looked in the light of feminism, which is not my point at all. I talk about every human irrespective of gender and age and relationship. I don't talk about what is expected of bahu or of girl Vs boy.