Is it something to only feel proud of? - Page 5

Originally posted by: nethraa_99

A different perspective from my own reply but totally convincing. ❤️

It certainly is consistent with how Sai is as a person. She does take ownership of her actions. It is the writer's fault that they are not setting up such an opportunity where they both have a conversation. It makes the characterization as well as the story incomplete. I guess instead of debating what Sai and Virat should do, we should actually discuss what the writers should show.

Another major problem is how the whole DevKit wedding was written. Few episodes before Sai is shown badly wanting to confide in Virat about everything. And then she takes a unilateral decision based on promises given to Ashwini and Pulkit. Such shoddy writing, uff .

Exactly. There are many things the writers can show to elevate the scene and Sairat relationship. I love their nok jhok but I'd love to see a deeper conversation about things. And there are so many logic fails and shoddy writing aspects that make us as a viewer get a little upset. Coz the writing is not consistent with our expectations of how a character will react.

So in the absence of writers showing us these scenes we have to use snippets of what happened and the body language/subtext to complete the story arc in our own heads. Because unfortunately we are not going to actually get a scene for each of these things.

Originally posted by: Nja91

Sai did make him sit down and explain calmly why she thought the letter was fake and was convincing him to reinvestigate. But pp interrupted that scene. After that it was shoddy writing/covid induced problems wtc ehich kinda ruined the track.

So its not that Sai is not capable of being calm and all the onus is only on virat to be mature and composed. But in a relationship where one person is 8-10 years older and personality wise also is the more shaant/calculated person, its obvious that he will be the one who bulk of the time will need to be the composed one who slows down the discussion instead of blowing a fuse. And we know that Virat does this SO much in his life already even pre Sai- being the diplomatic, sab ka chaheeta beta of CN trying to maintain balance. Now with Sai, he has one more person added in that mix and he is only human- so after a while he will reach his breaking point- and when he loses cool, all hell breaks loose. And he ONLY directs that at Sai or Aai subconsciously because they are the only people he can afford to take that liberty with. Thats why despite his hand holding/kicking out we can see that its not really Virat, and once he snaps back to reality, he realizes and regrets. And thats why Sai forgives him so quickly too. Coz she can see his guilt/regret and she has not forgotten everything that he has done for her.

I'd like to believe based on body language n subtext that Sai is definitely regretful of hiding things from Virat. She never lies/hides things in general especially from virat so it was an aberration for her. And she paid dearly for it. She won't repeat it. She will still be impulsive coz thats her core personality but i think she will always keep virat in the loop.

I dont think that because we didn't get an apology scene perse, Sai has not recognized her mistake or doesn't feel sorry for keeping virat in dark.

Again I'll say- I think her pride is not for hiding things from virat , its only for successfully ensuring devi tai is united with pulkit jeeju. Its a big deal. Its all devi tai ever wanted for herself. Thats why Virat also has not gone into his "hurt" of being in the dark because he knows Sai must have had some compulsion and he no longer cares about those compulsions because now devkit are together and thats all that matters. Between Sai n Virat, Sai still looks like she would definitely love to have a chat about what/why/how everything happened but Virat just wants to move on! He has not been shown reflecting on whether its really possible that omkar did this ALL himself with no support from bk/ninad, he doesn't care about devkit past, he doesn't care about why Sai hid things....he just wants to let it go and focus on present. Its good and bad. Theres no point crying over spilt milk but without reflection there is s small danger of history repeating itself.

But if both Sai and Virat individually reflect on their mistakes- Sai realizing she won't hide things and Virat understanding that when Sai seems wrong, and is isolated against everyone- that is all the more reason to oress pause button, take a deep breath and try to understand Sais motivation. Because no one gets Sai's actions like he does. He knows that behind her recklessness or impulsiveness is a clean heart, pure intentions and a strong moral compass of right vs wrong.

Would it be nice to get a Sairat scene with a nice conversation about these issues or a monologue about their reflections- yes but makers didnt give it to us so 🤷

Loved the post. I agree.

I love how I can relate with the Sai in your writing/posts. You give words to many characteristics of Sai which I think of her.

About her making him sit and explaining her, she has the capability, needs to practice it more often. She needs to change her mpulsive nature and also should stop acting stubborn.

And yes, I too believe Virat has to pause, take a deep breath, look at things from neutral eyes, try as much as possible to not get influenced by any teesra or family members and then deal with matters.

@green very much needed. And yes, Virat understands her like no one else does.

@bold I really like to think what you have written. That Virat knows she must have had some compulsion. Hope that is true. Otherwise it will all be like bottled up emotions.

@red that is a problem. It is not something to let go of or to be avoided. It has to be addressed whether it is issue with Sai or Omi or Devkit past. This attitude is not going to help always.

Originally posted by: asmi_joya

A disorder in which a person has an inflated sense of self-importance.

Narcissistic personality disorder is found more commonly in men. The cause is unknown but likely involves a combination of genetic and environmental factors.

A Person who has an excessive interest in or admiration of themselves.

Sai could be narcissistic about some decisions that she takes but she is not narcissistic in nature.. We are all narcissistic about something in our lives..that does make us in narcissist. Sai is anything but narcissist.

And Sai doesn't have inflated sense of self importance?

All she does is talk about herself, doesn't leave a chance to boast about things she has done, remember the scene where she put down every other woman saying

"Meri jagah koi aur ladki hoti to apni kismet par roti"?

Person who has an excessive interest in or admiration of themselves.

This is narcissistic 101

"MAINE YE KIYA" "Maine shadi karwai"

Mai Mai Mai all the time

She is narcissistic, is my observation of her character from her dialogues and her actions where she doesn't even consider people capable of giving an opinion

Except lack of empathy, I have noticed every trait of a narcissist in Sai

Originally posted by: Nja91

Sai did make him sit down and explain calmly why she thought the letter was fake and was convincing him to reinvestigate. But pp interrupted that scene. After that it was shoddy writing/covid induced problems wtc ehich kinda ruined the track.

So its not that Sai is not capable of being calm and all the onus is only on virat to be mature and composed. But in a relationship where one person is 8-10 years older and personality wise also is the more shaant/calculated person, its obvious that he will be the one who bulk of the time will need to be the composed one who slows down the discussion instead of blowing a fuse. And we know that Virat does this SO much in his life already even pre Sai- being the diplomatic, sab ka chaheeta beta of CN trying to maintain balance. Now with Sai, he has one more person added in that mix and he is only human- so after a while he will reach his breaking point- and when he loses cool, all hell breaks loose. And he ONLY directs that at Sai or Aai subconsciously because they are the only people he can afford to take that liberty with. Thats why despite his hand holding/kicking out we can see that its not really Virat, and once he snaps back to reality, he realizes and regrets. And thats why Sai forgives him so quickly too. Coz she can see his guilt/regret and she has not forgotten everything that he has done for her.

I'd like to believe based on body language n subtext that Sai is definitely regretful of hiding things from Virat. She never lies/hides things in general especially from virat so it was an aberration for her. And she paid dearly for it. She won't repeat it. She will still be impulsive coz thats her core personality but i think she will always keep virat in the loop.

I dont think that because we didn't get an apology scene perse, Sai has not recognized her mistake or doesn't feel sorry for keeping virat in dark.

Again I'll say- I think her pride is not for hiding things from virat , its only for successfully ensuring devi tai is united with pulkit jeeju. Its a big deal. Its all devi tai ever wanted for herself. Thats why Virat also has not gone into his "hurt" of being in the dark because he knows Sai must have had some compulsion and he no longer cares about those compulsions because now devkit are together and thats all that matters. Between Sai n Virat, Sai still looks like she would definitely love to have a chat about what/why/how everything happened but Virat just wants to move on! He has not been shown reflecting on whether its really possible that omkar did this ALL himself with no support from bk/ninad, he doesn't care about devkit past, he doesn't care about why Sai hid things....he just wants to let it go and focus on present. Its good and bad. Theres no point crying over spilt milk but without reflection there is s small danger of history repeating itself.

But if both Sai and Virat individually reflect on their mistakes- Sai realizing she won't hide things and Virat understanding that when Sai seems wrong, and is isolated against everyone- that is all the more reason to oress pause button, take a deep breath and try to understand Sais motivation. Because no one gets Sai's actions like he does. He knows that behind her recklessness or impulsiveness is a clean heart, pure intentions and a strong moral compass of right vs wrong.

Would it be nice to get a Sairat scene with a nice conversation about these issues or a monologue about their reflections- yes but makers didnt give it to us so 🤷

@Bold Oh great.. I am glad we understand the difference between pride and narcissism. Sai has yet not realised that she was wrong in hiding things from Virat and going ahead with the marriage. There is no reflection on her part there.I have mentioned in my previous post how Sai, with time has shown to be very respective and mature when she wants to talk about certain things, unlike her previous way of I will do what I deem fit attitude , without consulting anyone else.. Convincing is up to the spouses and the way they want to go with it. Virat convinced Sai for hiding his plan for getting her along till the last moment from Pakhi and family and Sai agreed, even though she was not okay with it she agreed.. Consequences also was faced more by Sai than Virat.

@red Well he has a habit of evading things. His reaction to Sai's actions and Omi's actions have been so completely opposite and that too within a span of probably 8-10 hrs..Sai did wrong here go with the worst punishment you could be given.. Omi kaka ne kiya.. warning do aur chor do.. Even though what Omi did was a crime and no ..no analysation on the fact that Kaku has been against the marriage, had hidden it for 10years and medicated Devi for the same and also Omi and Ninad both are her stooges..

Reflection is certainly an issue with Virat. He has not been shown to reflect much on a lot of things.

Every scene that we want to see will not be shown unfortunately. So some things we need to infer from body language and subtext only. I'm glad that atleast @laksh who started this thread and few others who have posted in this thread and forum are balanced in their opinions. So even when their pov is different from mine, I enjoy reading n responding. We all know Sai is not flawless. But theres a difference in having a streak of arrogance/recklessness/, impulsiveness/impatience and being "narcissistic" or "selfish". Everything she is doing is because she cares for devi/pulkit. She thinks of virats devi tai, aai, shivani bua, brother Mohit as HER family. If she was truly selfish, she'd only live there like a paying guest with no f***s to give about anything around her. Sai as a personality is stubborn/ziddi, nosy too, and a little bit arrogant due to her brought up/circumstances but thats balanced off by her clean heart/pure intentions free of malice and her moral compass which is NOT the case with bk, pp, sonali, karishma, ninad and omi. She does not do things for credit or appreciation but genuine goodwill but like any normal person when her well intentioned plans backfire or lead to her getting insulted, she retaliates. It hurts and angers her to be "taunted" for trying to do the right thing. Yes that doesn't mean she should not work on her negative traits, learn to pick and choose her battles and evolve, but that will be gradual and at the end of the day her core persona will not do a U turn. and this devkit fiasco was a result of hiding things from Virat. But thats not a recurrent theme but an aberration. She is too straight forward and truthful to be able to hide things- that too from her Virat Sir. She struggled to hide things during devkit saga and felt immensely guilty and paid a big price for it. So i think she has learnt her lesson.

While we may not agree with all her actions, dialogues people in their criticism posts should be mindful that at the end of the day she is the FL and the "heroine" not the "villain" . So if they "hate" Sai then perhaps they should not invest all this time watching this show and should pick something else to watch..why bother to watch a show where you detest the protagonist?!

Sometimes we also need to set aside the shoddy writing and logic look at the overall story and character arc.

We have pointed out logical issues many times. But that aside, did Sai intend to hide things and make devi elope deliberately- No..she did it due to compulsion. Those compulsions dont make full logical sense but in itv we need to swallow that. Was she happy about hiding the truth from virat- No. Did she want to apologize- yes..Would I like to see a scene where Sai apologizes to virat for hurting him by keeping him in the dark- YES! But if we dont get such a scene I wont assume that Sai is not at all apologetic or regretful.. Coz we did get to see how guilty/upset she was.

Originally posted by: laksh

Didn't catch that. I think the thread is talking about her convincing Virat to invite Devi Tai. It is not talking about her acting proud and not apologising.

Oh wait you’re opining that Sai was gloating? Sai wasn’t being proud because she hid whatever she hid from Virat (with reasons behind). We got her monologue before where she was shown regretting not confiding in him. If what Virat did wasnt inhumane, she would’ve apologised. We had seen her be sorry in her heart. It’s not that she wasn’t apologetic. She hasn’t got the time / re read circumstance where the issue would be brought up and they would talk about it (she would defo apologise b/c she’d tell him “oh when I was at the reception I was thinking of you and was sorry in my heart for hiding everything,” recently when she brought the topic up he cut her short so it means they’ll never talk about it again, thanks to Virat

and her trauma unaddressed, thanks to Cvs.

what’s “gloating” though? After the Amay incident when they had a fight in their room and he was listing all the things he did for her and among them there was one where he said, “who saved you from Jagtap? I saved you from Jagtap!” This is gloating. The fact that he is iterating saving her from sexual abuse/potential rape/harassment. A police officer. He adds in the end, “and what did you do for me? Reminded me you never loved me or wanted to marry me.” The fact that among the list of things he did for her, saving her from literal sexual abuse is included by him, a police officer, a duty — then in return something (pyaar se baat) is expected. The fact that among all the things he listed, THIS WAS INCLUDED BY HIM. This is what should’ve been called out.

“Oh he was not gloating.” No, this is exactly what being proud / gloating is.

@ bold for people suffering from dyslexia.

Originally posted by: idkwhattoput

Oh wait you’re opining that Sai was gloating? Sai wasn’t being proud because she hid whatever she hid from Virat (with reasons behind). We got her monologue before where she was shown regretting not confiding in him. If what Virat did wasnt inhumane, she would’ve apologised. We had seen her be sorry in her heart. It’s not that she wasn’t apologetic. She hasn’t got the time / re read circumstance where the issue would be brought up and they would talk about it (she would defo apologise b/c she’d tell him “oh when I was at the reception I was thinking of you and was sorry in my heart for hiding everything,” recently when she brought the topic up he cut her short so it means they’ll never talk about it again, thanks to Virat

and her trauma unaddressed, thanks to Cvs.

what’s “gloating” though? After the Amay incident when they had a fight in their room and he was listing all the things he did for her and among them there was one where he said, “who saved you from Jagtap? I saved you from Jagtap!” This is gloating. The fact that he is iterating saving her from sexual abuse/potential rape/harassment. A police officer. He adds in the end, “and what did you do for me? Reminded me you never loved me or wanted to marry me.” The fact that among the list of things he did for her, saving her from literal sexual abuse is included by him, a police officer, a duty — then in return something (pyaar se baat) is expected. The fact that among all the things he listed, THIS WAS INCLUDED BY HIM. This is what should’ve been called out.

“Oh he was not gloating.” No, this is exactly what being proud / gloating is.

@ bold for people suffering from dyslexia.

I understand your frustration. But i dont agree that Virat was "gloating" either. He was so angry that he used the wrong words- but he was expressing his frustration that she couldn't see that he is trying to do the best for her and wants to protect her and all he is asking of her in return is to tone down her angry young woman avataar a little bit. But unfortunately as it happens in every argument it escalated and came across to Sai and audience as if he was counting his ehsaan/ favors on her. But that was not the real intention. And i think over time (years!) not only Sai will tone down a little but Virat will also learn to accept that "angry bird"persona. I think he already has. He knows that behind her angry/reckless outer facade is a heart of gold, well intentioned girl who cannot control the urge to take up these andolans and projects do right by people around her😂. He relates to that himself but his style is different, more subdued and non confrontational. He will pick his battles and even ignore some things unlike Sai who is ready with her "sword" But their core principles are the same. And over time especially if Virat is consistent in his "actions", Sai will also learn to understand Virat's unsaid words or jalebis. You can see how content and reassured she looks everytime Virat defends her even silently. She knows heart of hearts that even his "inhumane" acts were a result of bottled up gussa and the provocation of people that are important to him, people he considers family. Thats not who he really is. Thats why she was able to forgive him. Infact even if accident had not happened Sai would have melted pretty soon. Imo, she had "forgiven"him in GC itself when she saw his sincerity- thats why in the fag end she tells him not to cry and looked upset to see him folding hands and all, but her delay in returning back to live with him was just to allow her wounded self respect to heal and for her anger/hurt to dissipate!

Originally posted by: Nja91

I understand your frustration. But i dont agree that Virat was "gloating" either. He was so angry that he used the wrong words- but he was expressing his frustration that she couldn't see that he is trying to do the best for her and wants to protect her and all he is asking of her in return is to tone down her angry young woman avataar a little bit. But unfortunately as it happens in every argument it escalated and came across to Sai and audience as if he was counting his ehsaan/ favors on her. But that was not the real intention. And i think over time (years!) not only Sai will tone down a little but Virat will also learn to accept that "angry bird"persona. I think he already has. He knows that behind her angry/reckless outer facade is a heart of gold, well intentioned girl who cannot control the urge to take up these andolans and projects do right by people around her😂. He relates to that himself but his style is different, more subdued and non confrontational. He will pick his battles and even ignore some things unlike Sai who is ready with her "sword" But their core principles are the same. And over time especially if Virat is consistent in his "actions", Sai will also learn to understand Virat's unsaid words or jalebis. You can see how content and reassured she looks everytime Virat defends her even silently. She knows heart of hearts that even his "inhumane" acts were a result of bottled up gussa and the provocation of people that are important to him, people he considers family. Thats not who he really is. Thats why she was able to forgive him. Infact even if accident had not happened Sai would have melted pretty soon. Imo, she had "forgiven"him in GC itself when she saw his sincerity- thats why in the fag end she tells him not to cry and looked upset to see him folding hands and all, but her delay in returning back to live with him was just to allow her wounded self respect to heal and for her anger/hurt to dissipate!

I understand what you’re saying but if we’re going by the good intention / concern behind the act argument then Sai shouldn’t be blamed for anything, at all.

Originally posted by: Nja91

Every scene that we want to see will not be shown unfortunately. So some things we need to infer from body language and subtext only. I'm glad that atleast @laksh who started this thread and few others who have posted in this thread and forum are balanced in their opinions. So even when their pov is different from mine, I enjoy reading n responding. We all know Sai is not flawless. But theres a difference in having a streak of arrogance/recklessness/, impulsiveness/impatience and being "narcissistic" or "selfish". Everything she is doing is because she cares for devi/pulkit. She thinks of virats devi tai, aai, shivani bua, brother Mohit as HER family. If she was truly selfish, she'd only live there like a paying guest with no f***s to give about anything around her. Sai as a personality is stubborn/ziddi, nosy too, and a little bit arrogant due to her brought up/circumstances but thats balanced off by her clean heart/pure intentions free of malice and her moral compass which is NOT the case with bk, pp, sonali, karishma, ninad and omi. She does not do things for credit or appreciation but genuine goodwill but like any normal person when her well intentioned plans backfire or lead to her getting insulted, she retaliates. It hurts and angers her to be "taunted" for trying to do the right thing. Yes that doesn't mean she should not work on her negative traits, learn to pick and choose her battles and evolve, but that will be gradual and at the end of the day her core persona will not do a U turn. and this devkit fiasco was a result of hiding things from Virat. But thats not a recurrent theme but an aberration. She is too straight forward and truthful to be able to hide things- that too from her Virat Sir. She struggled to hide things during devkit saga and felt immensely guilty and paid a big price for it. So i think she has learnt her lesson.

While we may not agree with all her actions, dialogues people in their criticism posts should be mindful that at the end of the day she is the FL and the "heroine" not the "villain" . So if they "hate" Sai then perhaps they should not invest all this time watching this show and should pick something else to watch..why bother to watch a show where you detest the protagonist?!

Sometimes we also need to set aside the shoddy writing and logic look at the overall story and character arc.

We have pointed out logical issues many times. But that aside, did Sai intend to hide things and make devi elope deliberately- No..she did it due to compulsion. Those compulsions dont make full logical sense but in itv we need to swallow that. Was she happy about hiding the truth from virat- No. Did she want to apologize- yes..Would I like to see a scene where Sai apologizes to virat for hurting him by keeping him in the dark- YES! But if we dont get such a scene I wont assume that Sai is not at all apologetic or regretful.. Coz we did get to see how guilty/upset she was.

Wow.. adding to that.. Virat never apologised for pyar dosti slip.. for not giving heed to her concerns about her results the day PP left..for equally hurting her during Amey Fiasco (they both were hurtful to each other).. for calling her the biggest mistake of his life indirectly.. for agreeing to PP that he got nothing in life or rather he spoiled his life by marrying Sai (by keeping quite at her allegations),for misunderstanding her in the alta fiasco for asking her to drop our from the dance competition..calling her mentally ill..

Did I expect an apology in the above situations? Yes.. Did I understand him when he did not ? Yes . Coz we clearly understood the situation that made him behave in the above situations ..

Originally posted by: idkwhattoput

I understand what you’re saying but if we’re going by the good intention / concern behind the act argument then Sai shouldn’t be blamed for anything, at all.

It doesn't happen that way. Everyone questioned when Virat was wrong and will question when Sai is wrong too. We are all questioning one's actions and not any character in specific. Also, not all actions will be questioned, some actions which are inconsequential are left, out of understanding.