After weeks, Shaurya found himself standing in front of the familiar door. It would be a lie to say he didn’t know what compelled him to appear before her tonight of all nights. He had put up with her behavior for long enough and somehow overhearing the conversation between her friends about that ACP had been the straw that broke the camel’s back. Enough was enough. His patience waned and Shaurya began to knock furiously, completely blinded by impulse to even consider where he was or what he was doing.
Anokhi recognized the knock all too well which was why she stayed on her bed, refusing to entertain him anymore. What had she gotten by allowing him to get away with every whim of his? A broken heart and dashed hopes? She had been the fool to read into his actions what wasn’t there. And she was paying the price for her stupidity. The knocking was relentless, but tonight she was being equally stubborn. After a few seconds, silence fell, and she wondered if he left. Anokhi buried her head in her hands, not sure what she even wanted. She claimed she didn’t want him there and yet, now that he had left, the silence disappointed her even more.
Her phone buzzed with a text from the number she didn’t have the heart to block. If you don’t want me to wake up the entire hostel by knocking all night long, open the door. She didn’t open the text, wondering if she should call his bluff. The silence continued for a minute more before she received another text. Okay Anokhi, whatever happens next, you’re responsible.
The knocking resumed, louder than before. It was incessant and Anokhi, worried that he would actually act on what he said, rushed to the door. She let out a huff when she opened, greeted by his disheveled and agitated form. “What?” She spat and he narrowed his eyes at her.
“What’s wrong with you? Why weren’t you opening the door?” He demanded, brushing past her into the room with no qualms at all. She closed the door behind him, locking it as she always did.
“What’s wrong with you sir? You shouldn’t be here. I was trying to sleep.” Shaurya observe her room, noting that she clearly hadn’t been trying to sleep. Her books were still open, though to a chapter that would have been covered much earlier in the semester.
“Of course, now you have a problem with me showing up right? Because now, you have other people for that.” His voice was icy, hurling an allegation shrouded in vague terms that did not register with her. Most of what he said these days went over her head. All she knew was that she didn’t want to be anywhere near him when she was barely able to control her heart.
“And if I do, what difference does that make? You always do what you want anyways. You come when you want, you go when you want.” He would give her attention when it suited him and then, he would toss her aside when someone better came along. The feeling of betrayal was strong despite knowing that he had never made promises to her. She had been the one building castles in the sky.
“And you cut off contact whenever you want.” He threw back, amazed that she would dare say he did whatever he wanted. She was the one that was ignoring him every day now. She was the one who wouldn’t answer his calls or texts, would avoid him at college. She was treating him like a criminal without telling him his crime.
“I don’t know what you mean. I’m just focusing on my studies.” She was surprised he even noticed that she was avoiding him. Otherwise, she figured he’d be too busy with someone else to notice that she had been going out of her way to not run into him. Before he could respond, Anokhi continued. “Besides, why does it matter? You have plenty of people giving you plenty of attention these days.”
“I don’t care about people, I care about,” he stopped, catching his slip of tongue like he always did. The thought of revealing what she meant to him terrified him when he considered that she might not reciprocate. “Just tell me why you’re avoiding me.” Maybe he was a masochist who came searching for answers he knew he wouldn’t like. Because he suspected her answer had everything to do with that officer that hovered around her day in and day out. Anokhi refused to respond directly to his inquiry, unwilling to reveal the way he had broken her heart without even realizing it.
“Sir, you should leave. I don’t even know why you’re here, but you shouldn’t have come.” She began to walk past him, unable to tolerate the way his eyes scrutinized her. If he stayed any longer, Anokhi worried she would spend the night oscillating between rage and misery.
“I’m not leaving until you tell me why you’re ignoring me.” Grabbing her wrist to stop her from walking away from him, he forcefully turned her around to face him. She let out a low gasp at the sudden action. Her hands landed on his chest to keep her body from colliding with his while his arm wrapped around her waist to keep them from falling back.
For a moment she could swear time stopped as she felt the warmth of his body against her. Anokhi cautiously looked up, only to find his eyes already trained on her. Her heart raced at the way he traced her features with his gaze. The anger that had burned moments ago was extinguished as Shaurya basked in the familiar comfort of having her in his arms. When his eyes fell on her lips, her breath hitched in her throat as she caught desire color his expression. His scent was intoxicating, and Anokhi watched as he leaned in to close the painful distance between them. Her grip on his shirt tightened in anticipation, her own longing completely clouding her better judgement.
He moved agonizingly slow, as though punishing her for ignoring him these past few weeks. Or was he teasing her for wanting him so badly? He hovered above her lips, waiting for some sign that she wanted him to continue. That she needed this as much as he did. As the warmth from his breath fanned over her, Anokhi’s lids closed. And that was all the indication he needed for his lips to crash into hers.
She felt like every nerve in her body was on overdrive as his lips moved urgently over hers, giving her little time to adjust. Though she struggled to match his pace, she matched his desperation in the way her lips refused to part from his. He released her wrist only to lace his fingers through her hair while she snaked her hands around his neck. She leaned up as he deepened the kiss, impatiently prodding her lips to part so he could taste her fully. She complied enthusiastically and his grip on her waist tightened at the confirmation of her desire. Bringing her body flush against his, Shaurya’s continued to explore her hungrily. She pulled away first, only breaking to gasp for air, her breathes shallow. He admired the evidence of their passion in her swollen lips and crimson-colored cheeks. He was on a high, one that he could not seem to come down from.
Giving her time to catch her breath, he moved his attention to other places. Beginning by placing feathery kisses along her jaw, he worked his way down. Leaving no inch of skin unattended, he explored the contours of her neck. His soft assault sent shivers down her spine. She let out a whispery moan at the new sensations that he was giving her, tilting her head to the side to give him more access. Delicate brushes of his lips quickly turned into a trail of wet kisses. His stubble ignited the hypersensitive area as his teeth lightly grazed her exposed skin. She allowed herself to succumb to his touch and her soft gasps of pleasure drove him absolutely crazy. He wasn’t thinking straight as his steps hurriedly walked them towards a surface. Any surface.
Barely aware of her surroundings, Anokhi’s mind was completely lost in the way his tongue and mouth were dancing across her skin. Her back hit the wall just as he sucked a tender part of her neck. “Sir,” she moaned unwittingly and somehow the very word he detested, worked as an aphrodisiac in the moment. Her nails dug into his flesh to keep him against her and the light pinch added to his pleasure. But in readjusting their bodies one more time, he bumped into the table beside them, hissing in actual pain at the impact.
The falling of a vase broke her lustful trance as his lips stopped for a brief moment. Both of their attention went to the shattered shards and somewhere in the back of her mind a voice reminded her that this couldn’t be happening. Not because she didn’t want it. She desperately did. But she couldn’t want this. They couldn’t be doing this.
“We can’t” She barely whispered as the reality of their transgression dawned on her. His eyes shifted back to her, wondering if she regretted what had happened. Perhaps he had gotten too caught up in the moment. Whatever bliss he felt a moment ago crashed around him as she continued. “We can’t be doing this. You can’t be here. Not when,” Slowly the guilt was settling in for wanting someone who was taken. For allowing this to happen. “Not when you’re someone else’s.” He observed her with absolute confusion and his anger slightly spiked, assuming that she misspoke and flipped the statement.
“Me? You’re the one going around with that ACP. Are you feeling sorry towards him?” She tried to struggle out of his grip, and this time, he let her distance herself from him. Because he could sense the remorse washing over her which only validated his greatest fears. He was too late. She didn’t want him the way he did because she was already with someone else.
“Why are you always talking about ACP Ahir?” She complained, visibly irritated by Shaurya’s obsession with bringing him between everything. Did he not understand the gravity of what they had just done? The fact that they had just betrayed the trust of someone else gnawed away at her conscience and he was talking about the ACP? “Why would I feel sorry towards him?” His lack of understanding drew another round of ire from her as she tried to figure out what they could possibly do to make this right.
“Because he’s clearly interested in you and you’re,” Shaurya began, but Anokhi was in no mood to hear his speculations and shut them down quickly. “ACP Ahir is my friend. He always has been, and he always will be.” As she pushed her hair out of her face, Shaurya felt a glimmer of hope that everything he had been assuming was wrong. It didn’t change the fact that he hated seeing the man around her but the fact that his feelings were unreciprocated soothed the fire that had been burning within for months. But before he could fully process the revelation that there was nothing between Anokhi and Ahir, she surprised him again.
“I feel sorry towards Shagun ma’am. And you should too!” She glared up at him with obvious shame at what had just happened. This was a mistake. She should have never let him into her room to begin with. She shouldn’t have given into her desire and he should have never come to see her. Shaurya cut her thoughts off with his line of questions.
“What the hell are you talking about Anokhi? Why are you dragging Shagun into this?” She scoffed at his audacity. As though he didn’t already know where his fiancée fit into the picture. He had never told her so maybe he thought she didn’t know.
“I know about your engagement. You don’t have to hide it.” Her words, though statements, came out as accusations. She knew that was unfair. He didn’t owe her an explanation. Shagun was with the woman that fit his lifestyle and fit his family. What right did Anokhi have to feel wronged? But when he had someone who was so perfect for him, what was he doing here?
“I don’t know what you’re talking about. Shagun and I were engaged. But that ended months ago.” She rolled her eyes at the half-truths he was giving her. Everything that she had been suppress was tumbling out now that the floodgates had been opened. “I’m talking about the fact that you’re getting back together with her but showing up at my room in the middle of the night.” Her voice raised in register and her accusations were no longer masked. Because now, she did have a right to feel wronged. “I’m talking about the fact that you’re in love with her but you’re here kissing me.”
Shaurya looked at her like she was completely crazy. He had no idea where or how she had managed to reach all the wrong conclusions. “Anokhi, you’ve gone mad.” He insisted, pieces of the puzzle slowly falling into place. Suddenly her avoidance, her taunts, they were registering in his mind. For many week, they had been talking about realities they had both constructed in their heads. Realities that were far from the truth.
Placing his hands on her shoulders, he pulled her close once again, giving her a stern warning with his eyes when she tried to protest. “Listen to me carefully Ms. Bhalla.” Anokhi refused to look at him, not wanting him to see her breakdown.
“Shagun was my past and I fully intend to keep it that way.” Regardless of what she might have understood, Shaurya had the utmost clarity about where his heart found its home. And he realized the longer he waited to tell her, the more they would build unnecessary walls. The more they'd be wasting precious time that could be spent with each other wallowing over misunderstandings. “There is nothing going on between us.” Anokhi blinked a few times in confusion, and she finally looked at him, her anger slowly morphing into hope.
“I’m already with the person I love.” He could see her expression fall, and the corners of his lips curved up slightly at the disappointment that she couldn’t seem to hide anymore. For weeks he had wondered what was going on in her heart, if she was feeling the same way that he felt about her. And now he felt like an idiot. Everything was clearly written on her face. How could he have missed it? “Right now.” It took a moment, but he caught the flash of understanding in her expression.
“You mean,” she didn’t finish, not wanting to break this moment if it were just a dream by asking him what she needed to know. And he just leaned in to utter the words her gaze was begging him to say.
“You Ms. Anokhi Bhalla.” The day wasn’t special like he intended, and the place was far from grand like he’d envisioned. Yet he had her in his arms, at a time when the world couldn’t bother them. That alone made everything about this moment perfect. “I love you.” He confessed, finally saying what he had desperately wished to say.
Anokhi looked up at him, the moisture she had been fighting back finally gathering in her eyes at the onslaught of emotions. Her heart simply did not know what to feel in the moment. After weeks of thinking that he was someone else’s, he was telling her he was hers. Had it not been for his arms keeping her grounded, Anokhi swore she’d have floated off the ground. But her fear trapped her happiness and she pinched herself hard. Eyes closing at the pain, for a second, Anokhi dared not open them. She had imagined a moment just like this many times in her dreams. What if this was just a hallucination? A daydream? But when her lids fluttered open, the man who ruled her heart stood before her, looking at her like she was both the most precious and most insane person in the world.
The tears couldn’t stay back any longer and neither could her smile. He observed with amusement at the mixed reaction he was receiving. “Are you laughing or crying?” He asked, breaking into a soft laugh himself as he wiped away the stray drops on her cheeks. “I don’t know,” she whined, burying her head in his chest and wrapping her arms around him as all the agony of her fears melted away.
His arms enveloped her in a strong embrace, meant very much to keep her close to him. After feeling like he had lost her forever, Shaurya never intended to let her be separate from him again. “I…I love you too.” She responded, knowing she wouldn’t be able to confess if she were looking at him. And if their kiss had given him a high, this moment felt like pure ecstasy.
Anokhi took her sweet time before pulling away from him, only then seeing the flowers and remnants of her vase on the ground. “How is it that whenever you come to visit, you make a mess?” She chided, lamenting the broken plaster scattered across the floor. Shaurya observed the collateral damage from their moment of passion. All things considered, he figured it was rather light. Things could have looked much, much worse had she not stopped him. His smile grew at the thought and she looked up when he didn’t speak, unsure what to make of his distracted expression. “What are you thinking?” He looked down at her with a look she couldn't understand and shook his head after a moment. “It’s nothing. Come, I’ll help you clean.”
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A/N: So I've teleported myself to the end of this upcoming track and will wait for everyone there because I'm all about avoidance of pain. I just started writing and this is the rambly mess I came up with. I hope you all enjoy and please excuse any mistakes!! Also, I'm going to call this another installment of Juwi's saaf safaai series 🤣🤣
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