You know Abir was overweight when he was a kid. Maybe it could have skewed his thinking. Kids are brutal when it comes to looks. And his non alpha personality might have made others to not take him seriously. Maybe thats why he has a thought process different from his family. Years of being ridiculed and considering him as a non entity by others has made him a little more empathetic to other's pain. Abandoned by his Baba and his mother not understanding him has made him feel alone in his family. He learnt to keep his pain to himself because he considered his pain to be less than other's pain. Gradually he learnt to acknowledge that he is worth it but there is a difference between knowing and believing. Mish made him believe it.
When he met Mishti he met a kindred soul. Mish with her height problems and Abir with his weight problems and both of them with their shitload of abandonment issues/lack of self worth made a perfect pair.
Haan you are right Abir taught Mish about self worth but he taught Kuhu about self respect. There is a difference. Because Mish doesn't lack self respect and Kuhu doesn't consider herself worthless except when she throws random self pity parties.
haan perfectly put mini... this is his exact issue... he would connect with mish instantly bcoz of their similar pain n also how she shielded herself even with it... remember his words the girl knows to smile even with so much pain... that fits for him too..
actually meenu is a major part why he doesnt realize his worth.. she keeps saying he is irresponsible, and wants him to take over the business but she doesnt understand that his interest is not that... and also the family like we said for mishti even for abir they use him when needed but then leaves him at end... best example is first scene where ketu thinks of abir who was the only one who would help her, kunal searches for abir as he needs to find ketu n also they didnt even wanted to inform abir about fixing ketu rishta that itself says how much importance he holds in that house... this has reduced him to how he is now... there is a saying that we dont wish for the pain we went through even for our enemy abir is following this heartedly... thats why he understands others pain but neglects his... he too craves for someone to understand him thats why he connected with mish, wanted baba back...
and if you see mish was the first person who acknowledged his true love for family, his efforts n all... she keeps saying abir knows the value of family, how he loves them unconditionally, she had fought for him many times, even the when he went to jail for ved matter meenu got angry for unnecessary reason but mish said dont you understand by doing this you are hurting the people who care for you... i care for you bcoz i'm your friend.. she is the first person who made him feel special without any expectation... she was the only one who supported him in everything he did his search for baba, or ngo matters... he is still yet to know his self worth yaar n its fully in mish hands only...
today if kunal started changing then mish also has a part... the first word kunal said during baba end episode was i'll be the brother abir deserves that was said by mish... she will be the answer to every quest of his, give him all the love he has been craving for... i want a track where his insecurity, abundance issue is handled yaar...
about mish n kuhu i agree it was two different thing.. i said that he was like a mentor n guide to them...