Laughs -- Taxi Driver

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Man

@Manzz

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Posted: 17 years ago

Laughs

Hello

Taxi

A passenger taps the taxi driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. Suddenly the driver screams, loses control of the vehicle, nearly hits a bus, mounts the pavement, and stops inches from a shop window. For a second, everything is quiet in the cab, then the driver says, "Don't ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me!"

The passenger apologises and says he didn't realise that a little tap could scare someone so much.

The driver replies, "Sorry, it's not really your fault. Today is my first day as a taxi driver - for the last 25 years I've been driving a hearse."

Edited by Manzz - 17 years ago

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Man

@Manzz

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Posted: 17 years ago

Laughs

Hello

Pet Names

Bernie was invited to his friend's home for dinner. Morris, the host, preceded every request to his wife by endearing terms, calling her Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, Pumpkin, etc. Bernie looked at Morris and remarked, "That is really nice, that after all these years that you have been married, you keep calling your wife those pet names."

Morris hung his head and whispered, "To tell the truth, I forgot her name three years ago."

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Man

@Manzz

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+ 5

Posted: 17 years ago

Laughs

Hello

Science Class

The teacher of the Earth Science class was lecturing on map reading. He spent the class explaining about latitude, longitude, degrees, and minutes.

Towards the end of class, the teacher asked his students, "Suppose I asked you to meet me for lunch at 23 degrees, 4 minutes north latitude and 45 degrees, 15 minutes east longitude..."

A student's voice broke the confused silence, and volunteered, "I guess you'd be eating alone, Sir."

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Man

@Manzz

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Posted: 17 years ago

Laughs

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Disorderly Conduct

Three men stood before a judge on a charge of drunk and disorderly conduct in a public park.

Judge: "What were you doing?"

1st man: "Oh, just throwing peanuts in the pond."

Judge: "And what were you doing?"

2nd man: "I was throwing peanuts in the pond, too."

Judge: "Sounds harmless. And you, were you throwing peanuts in the pond as well?"

3rd man: "No, Sir. I am Peanuts!"

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Man

@Manzz

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+ 5

Posted: 17 years ago

Laughs

Hello

Teacher: please use the word gruesome in a sentence.

Child: my dad stoped shaving and grew some whiskers.

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Man

@Manzz

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+ 5

Posted: 17 years ago

Laughs

Hello

When the teacher asks you for your homework, ask him if he beleives someone should be punished for something they did not do? and when he says no, tell him "well in that case i didn't do my homework"

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Laughs -- Taxi Driver

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