Laughs -- Salary Rise

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Posted: 17 years ago
#1
Laughs


Hello

They say laughter is the best medicine, after all.

When I asked my boss for a salary rise because I was doing the work of three men he said he couldn't increase my pay, but if I told him the names of the three men he'd fire them.

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Posted: 17 years ago
#2
Laughs


Hello

They say laughter is the best medicine, after all.

I am always delighted when people stick their noses in my business - my company makes paper tissues
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Posted: 17 years ago
#3
Laughs


Hello

They say laughter is the best medicine, after all.


Engineer Who Has Retired

There was an engineer who had an exceptional gift for fixing all things mechanical. After serving his company loyally for over 30 years, he happily retired.

Several years later the company contacted him regarding a seemingly impossible problem they were having with one of their multi-million dollar machines. They had tried everything and everyone else to get the machine fixed, but to no avail. In desperation, they called on the retired engineer who had solved so many of their problems in the past. The engineer reluctantly took the challenge.

He spent a day studying the huge machine. At the end of the day, he marked a small "x" in chalk on a particular component of the machine and proudly stated, "This is where your problem is".

The part was replaced and the machine worked perfectly again. The company received a bill for $50,000 from the engineer for his service. They demanded an itemized accounting of his charges.

The engineer responded briefly:
One chalk mark: $1
Knowing where to put it: $49,999

It was paid in full and the engineer retired again in peace.
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Posted: 17 years ago
#4
Laughs


Hello

They say laughter is the best medicine, after all.


Desert Island

Three guys are alone on a desert island: an engineer, a biologist and an economist. They are starving and don't have a thing to eat, but somehow they find a can of beans on the shore.
The engineer says: let's hit the can with a rock until it opens.

The biologist has another ideia:
"No. We should wait for a while. Erosion will do the job."

Finally, the economist says:
"Let's assume that we have a can opener".
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Posted: 17 years ago
#5
Laughs


Hello

They say laughter is the best medicine, after all.


Irish Engineer

Young man Murphy applied for an engineering position at an Irish firm based in Dublin. An American applied for the same job and both applicants having the same qualifications were asked to take a test by the department manager.
Upon completion of the test, both men only missed one of the questions. The manager went to Murphy and said, "Thank you for your interest, but we've decided to give the American the job."

Murphy asked, "And why would you be doing that? We both got nine questions correct. This being Ireland, and me being Irish I should get the job!"

The manager said, "We have made our decision not on the correct answers, but rather on the question that you missed."

Murphy then asked, "And just how would one incorrect answer be better than the other?"

The manager replied, "Simple, the American put down on question #5, 'I don't know.' You put down, 'Neither do I'."

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Posted: 17 years ago
#6
Laughs


Hello

They say laughter is the best medicine, after all.

Q: Does an apple a day keep the doctor away?

A: If you aim it well enough, yes.

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