
CHAPTER 7. MAANEET AND THEIR FIGHTS! UFF!
"Chaliye chaliye! Gaadi pharr se chalaaiye aur phurrr se mennu ghar le jaayiye!", the girl ordered Maan as she made herself comfortable on the passenger seat. Maan raised an eyebrow at her order. Who does she think I am? Her driver? He shook his head and started the jeep. Forget it Maan! Its not worth getting your blood pressure up! There was silence for the next few minutes and then...
"Waise tussi mennu bataao aap Hoshiarpur kyun jaa rahe ho? Kya koi kaam hai? Ya chutti manaane chale ho? Chutti manaane chale ho toh bataa dun ki wahaan jaana bekaar hai, wahaan aapko kuch nahi milega! Haan! Lekin gaao ke aaju baaju bahut achchi jagah hai dekhne ke liye! Waise aap yahaan ke lagte nahi ho! Baahar gaao ke ho? Agar ho toh bachke rehna, yahaan ullu banaane waale bahut log milenge! Waise aapke kapdon se lagta hai ki aap chutti ke liye nahi aaye ho! Phir toh aap woh naye makaan ke kaam se aaye ho na? Kya kehte hain use? Haan! Maal! (Mall) Maal ke silsile mein aayo na? Pata nahi aap logon ko kya milega...", the girl kept on talking.
Maan's jaw dropped open and he turned to look at the girl in shock. How much did she speak? And how many questions? And can't she speak slowly? I can't understand a single word! My God! The girl continued to speak, " ...waise aapko kuch samajh nahi aaye toh aap mere ghar aa sakte hain! Gaao mein kisi se poochlo, Geet ka ghar kahaan hai aur chale aana! Waise aap..."
"SHUT UP! JUST SHUT UP!", Maan roared making the girl flinch, "Can't you see I am driving here?", he slammed his hand on the steering wheel and continued to rant, his accent coming out thick, "I can't focus! I need silence! And by the way, I can't make a single thing out of what you are saying. You are talking too fast. Just shut up and let me drive! Once we reach our destination, we can sit down and you ask as many questions as you like and I will answer all of them but right now just shut up!"
The girl remained quiet and Maan heaved a sigh of relief. He focused on the road. They had now left the city outskirts so the road had no artificial lights around it except a lamp post that was placed on the road every few miles ahead. The only thing giving them light right now was the moon that played hide and seek with clouds. Maan smiled as the wind played with his hair. This is what he wanted; smooth road, wind in his hair and a long drive towards his destination.
Maan had just relaxed when a quiet voice spoke up from beside him, "Waise... aap abhi kya chillaye mennu ek bhi cheez samajh ni aayi!" Maan turned his incredulous eyes towards the girl, "Tumhein kuch nahi samjha?" The girl pouted and shook her head again. Maan huffed and turned back to the road, "Of course you didn't! Tumhein toh English aati hi nahi!" He thought he mumbled it quietly but the girl still heard it.
"Kya kahaa aapne?", the girl turned to him and glared at him, "Mennu Angreji aandi hai! I know Englis! I can taak Englis! I not some... Some unpadh girl ok?"
Maan blinked in surprise. The girl knew English, alright! Only it was totally broken and twisted to resemble some other language.
The girl seem to be insulted by his silence because she spoke up again, "I speak turuth! I know Englis! Woh toh aapki boli bahut ajeeb hai!"
"Boli! What's that?", Maan asked in American accent.
The girl huffed, "Arre yahi! Vaat vaat! Woh Angreji mein kya bolte hain? Haan! Aaksent! Boli! Aaksent!"
"Oh! You mean accent!", Maan spoke and the girl nodded, "Haan! Haan! Wahi! Badi ajeeb hai!"
Maan nodded and then as her words got through him he whipped his head towards her, "What? What did you say? You think I have weird... what did you say... ajeeb accent? I?"
The girl nodded and Maan growled, "My foot! My accent is not weird! What was that word you used? Boli! Yes! Meri boli ajeeb nahi hai!"
The girl frowned, "Nahi nahi! Aapko pata nahi! Aapki boli bahut ajeeb hai! Kisi se bhi poochlo!"
"Ya right!", Maan spat, "I don't have any ajeeb boli ok?"
"Hai! Bahut ajeeb hai aapki angreji!", the girl huffed.
"No! Nahi hai!", Maan hissed.
"Hai!", the girl's eyes widened.
"Nahi hai!", Maan reiterated.
"Hai!", the girl said it casually.
"Nahi hai!", Maan was getting more and more agitated.
"Hai!"
"Nahi hai!"
"Hai!"
"Nahi hai!"
"Hai!"
"Nahi hai!"
Suddenly the girl broken down laughing. Maan looked at her in surprise. The girl noticed his look and tried to explain in between her bouts of laughter, "Hum dono hahahahah... Bachcho jaise... hahahahah... lad rahe hain..." Maan blinked for few minutes and then even he chuckled. She was right! They were being so silly! Maan joined the laughter and for few seconds there was echoes of laughter in the jeep. Maan looked at the girl as their laughter petered out and both smiled at each other.
Suddenly a horn rang, breaking the silence of the moment and Maan and Geet turned simultaneously to look at the road. Their eyes widened. Geet screamed and Maan went pale as the bright lights of incoming truck almost blinded them. Maan spun the steering wheel towards the left and they swerved out of the truck's way. Maan pressed the break pedal harshly and the jeep came to stop. Maan took deep breaths trying to calm his fast beating heart. Once the shock of the almost accident passed away, he turned to look at the girl. She was also breathing hard and stared at the darkness around them.
"You alright?", Maan whispered. The girl continued to look ahead as beads of perspiration lined her forehead. "Hey!", Maan shook her hand and the girl turned to look at him. Her eyes were wide at staring at him with fear. Maan asked her, "Are you ok?" "Huh? Kya bole?", the girl blinked. Maan rolled his eyes, "Tum theek ho?" She nodded and replied, "Main theek hun!"
For few seconds they sat still, trying to get their bearings and then Maan spoke up, "I think we should not travel in night anymore! We should get some rooms and stay the night! Humein kahin rukna hoga!" The girl nodded and Maan started to drive ahead. After 20 minutes, they came across a motel. Maan sighed and parked his Jeep in front of it. Both got down, the girl with her small bag that hung on her shoulder and Maan with his backpack. Both entered the motel and Maan asked for some rooms.
"Sir! Teen rooms hain khaali! Do first floor pe aur aur ek second floor pe!", the Receptionist informed them. Maan looked at the girl, "Dono rooms ek hi floor pe lete hai. What do you say?"
The girl nodded, "Haan ji! Theek hai!"
Maan told the receptionist to book the rooms on the first floor. He pulled out his card to pay for the rooms.
"Ek minute!", the girl squealed and Maan turned to look at her.
"I pay for myself!", the girl spoke.
Maan huffed, "No need! Koi jaroorat nahi! Main pay kardeta hun!"
The girl huffed, "Main paise de dungi! Aapko mere room ke liye pay karne ki koi jaroorat nahi!"
Maan shook his head, "Look! I will pay! Agar tum bus mein gayi hoti toh tumhein yeh pay karna nahi padta! Meri wajah se hum yahaan hai! So I will pay!"
"Arre waah! Maan na maan! Main tera mehmaan! Ajnabi hoke aap paise kyun denge mere liye?", the girl stomped her foot.
"But I can't let you pay! How can I let you pay when I am right here?", Maan growled.
"Phirse woh ajeeb Angrezi!", Geet whined.
Maan huffed, "Stop insulting my Engl..."
"Sirji!", the receptionist interrupted them, "Jara jaldi paise denge!"
Maan sighed as he realised that once again he was behaving in a silly manner, "Fine! We will pay together. How much?"
"3000 Rs. Har kamre ke liye Sirji!", the Receptionist told them.
"Kya?", the girl beside Maan spluttered. Maan turned to look at her and she looked at him worriedly, "Mere paas abhi itne paise nahi hai!" She showed him the 2000 Rs. Note in her hand. Maan huffed and shook his head, "Was our argument necessary?"
"Ki?", the girl looked at him confused and Maan rolled his eyes. He pulled out the cash, paid for both rooms and followed the waiter to their rooms.
Next day Maan woke up to incessant knocking on his door. He looked at the watch on his arm. It was 8 in the morning. I slept so late! Must be due to driving and jet lag! He got up and opened the door. The girl from last night stood in front of him grinning, "Good waale maarning hai ji!" Maan nodded, "Good morning!"
"Neeche chai peene jaa rahi thi! Socha aapko bhi peeni hogi! Chalein?", the girl spoke up and flounced away. Maan blinked, "Arre ruko! Let me brush my teeth atleast!" But the girl was gone already. Maan sighed and shook his head.
After brushing his teeth and washing his face, Maan went down searching for a restaurant. But he noticed that there was nothing like that in the Motel. Infact, they had no eating options. Oh great! Nothing to eat or drink! But wait! Then how did the girl planned to get her tea? He walked out of the Motel only to find the girl sitting in front of the nearby stall drinking tea from a small glass. She brightened up the moment she saw him, "Arre! Aap aagaye! Aayiye! Chai lenge?"
Maan sat down beside her and shook his head. He closed his eyes and placed his head on his hands, "No! I prefer Espresso! Order me Espresso please!"
"Kya bole?", the girl asked and Maan huffed, "Coffee chaahiye mujhe!"
"Kya?", the girl shrieked making Maan look at her, "Lekin yahaan toh Coffee nahi milti!", the girl looked at him worriedly.
"What? Why not? Kyun nahi milti?", he looked at the stall owner who was boiling the tea for other customers.
"Oh ji! Yahaan koi coffee nahi peeta na, isliye! Waise aap chai peejiye! Bahut badhiya hai!", the girl informed him.
"Chai? No thanks! I hate it! Mujhe chai pasand nahi!", Maan huffed.
"Arre! Try toh keejiye! Yahaan ki chai ki baat hi kuch aur hai!", the girl grinned.
"No way! Its tastes yuck!", Maan made a face.
The girl pouted, "Aap kya bole samjhi nahi! Lekin lagta hai aapne meri chai ko kuch bura kahaa! Dekhiye! Aap mujhe kuch bhi bol deejiye! Lekin mere Chai ko kuch mat kahiye!"
Maan raised an eyebrow, "I will say it again and again! It tastes horrible!"
"Hey Babaji! Aapne mere Chai ko bura kahaa! Bura meri Chai nahi, aapki Coffee hai! Ek dum ajeeb!", she huffed.
"Don't blame my Coffee! My Coffee is better!", Maan spat.
"Hain! Kya bole?", she was confused, "Khair! Jo bhi bole! Chai behtar hai!"
"Coffee better hai!"
"Chai!"
"Coffee!"
"Chai!"
"Coffee!"
"Chai!"
Suddenly Maan started chuckling, "We are back to arguing like kids!"
"Kya? Kya bole?", the girl asked and Maan chuckled again, "Kuch nahi! Chai piyo!"
She shrugged and focused on her tea.
"Waise twadda naam kee hai?", she asked in between her sips of tea.
"Excuse me?", Maan didn't understand a single word of the girl's Punjabi.
The girl huffed, "Name! Your name!"
"Maan! Maan Singh Khurana!", Maan said.
"Waah! Khurana! Bada khaandaani naam hai! Aur Maan! Waah! Naam bhi bada shaandaar hai!", the girl praised and Maan ducked his head feeling a little embarrassed.
"By the way, what's your name? Tumhara naam kya hai?", Maan asked.
The girl's eyes widened, "Oh ji! Tennu yaad nahi! Kal hi raat ko toh bataaya tha!", the girl looked incredulous.
Maan narrowed his eyes trying to remember the moment and then he rolled his eyes, "Mujhe yaad nahi! Woh tum itna tez bol rahi thi na ki ..."
"Tez?", she cut him off, "Main tez nahi baat karti! Aapne theek se suna nahi aur ab bahaane bana rahe ho!", she huffed.
Maan was taken aback, "What? No! I am not lying. Tum bahut bolti ho!"
"Hey Babaji!", the girl gasped, "Main bahut bolti hun! Aisa kuch nahi hai! Aap jhoote ho!"
"Jhoota! You call me liar! You are a liar! Jhooti hogi tum!", Maan growled.
"Aap jhoote ho!!", the girl folded her arms against her chest.
"Tum jhooti!", Maan mirrored her pose.
"Aap!", she growled.
"Tum!", he hissed.
"Aap!"
"Tum!"
"Aap!"
"Tum!"
"Aap!"
"Tum!"
"Ek minute! Kya hum phirse ladne baith gaye?", Maan asked in surprise. The girl's eyes widened and she giggled. Maan shook his head. He paid for the tea before she could pay it and got up and walked away. Maan was grabbed by his hand from behind. He turned around to see the girl smiling at him softly, "Geet! Main Geet hun!" Maan smiled softly too, "Hello Geet!" "Satsriyakal!", she whispered.
An hour later found Geet and Maan in the Jeep driving towards Hoshiarpur.
"You know I am curious!", Maan spoke up and Geet who was enjoying the wind looked at him, still not understanding his accent. He passed her a smile and then focused on the driving.
"Tum Dilli mein kya kar rahi thi?", Maan asked. When Geet didn't speak up, Maan turned to look at her. She was looking ahead and her face displayed sadness. Maan felt bad. I shouldn't have asked her about it. Look how sad she is! He opened his mouth to tell her that she didn't have to tell him when she spoke up, "Main Dilli gayi thi apne hone waale pati se milne!"
Did you get a jhatka folks? Let me know what you think about this update!
Thank you, take care and have fun,
Kalpana
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