New OS : Questions...

Flashback...

Maddox Square Puja Ground..
Kolkata, 2015

"Did you really think we can work it through?", Sanket's screaming words were enough to heat up her cheeks as Jodha turned a brighter shade of red.

His words rang out louder than he expected and soon Sanket's eyes caught strangers looking back at them in confusion.

"Sanket please", Jodha's helplessly murmured and tugged at his elbow.

Whether it was the staring crowd at Maddox Square or the embarrased face of Jodha or the happiness and smell of Durga Puja in the air, which did it's magic, but Jodha soon found her husband following her out of the Puja ground.

Jodha sighed heavily sensing his anger ebbing out a little as the rigidness left his hand. She foud it easy to guide him to their car which was parked outside the pandal area. She stopped in front of the Galaxy Black Renault Duster. Without uttering a word, she saw Sanket open the car lock and get inside . He unlocked the passenger seat and waited for Jodha to get it.

"Let's go to some quiet place.. Where we can discuss this", Jodha muttered while adjusting her seat belt.

He didn't utter a word and inserted the key, making the duster engine roar into life.

Jodha felt herself leaning back against the comfortable, cushioned head rest.Her head was pounding rapidly. She felt her migraine return back as the duster picked up speed. She glanced sideways only to be greeted by the frowning side profile of her husband.. Husband.. if only she could accept him whole heartedly as that.

Letting out a long sigh, she closed her eyes feeling the tears collecting in them. She could not shed tears and that also now.. When things were spiraling out of control in her life. But things were not supposed to be like this, specially not today, on the dayt of Ashtami. She remembered how happy Sanket looked seeing her in the bright red and black saree that he gifted. She had dressed for him.. though in her mind she knew she could never be his but still she had tried. She had tried to be happy with her husband, with the man her father chose for her. She opened her eyes, feeling the car stop. It was a signal. Looking outside the window she could see many other cars , all halted because of the red light. Nothing was different, except that in the others there was happiness but inside theirs, there was only tension and gloom.

Tears sprang in her eyes again and yet again she closed them tightly, preventing the salty water from spilling over.

She again remembered Sanket's laughing face when she had joked about him, wearing the traditional Bengali Punjabi-Pyajama. What had gone wrong in the span of two hours? She knew the answer. Obviously she knew it. It was the chance encounter with that man, that had made all the difference.

The four wheeler started again and she opened her eyes. But failing to recognize the road that they were passing through, Jodha closed it again. She could sense Sanket's anger rising with her silence. But she chose to leave that for the time being.

She could still see the shock that passed over his eyes as Jalaluddin Muhammad, the renowned writer and the winner of last year's Man Booker Prize grazed the temporary made stage at the Maddox Square Puja Ground. He was there to promote his next book, a very simple cause which had nothing to do with her husband. But she had felt him stiffen and she knew the reason. It was because of her. Sometimes she felt she should not have divulged the truth about Jalal to Sanket. But she knew that would have been cheating.. Wasn't she cheating him now? Even after being married to him for the last nine months, she had refused to consummate their marriage. She had made Sanket promise to her not to touch her without her consent. But she knew very well that she will never be able to give him the consent.

Still she had tried to move on. She had refrained from reading articles about Jalal in newspapers and magazines. Whenever the television channels showed him, she had made sure to change the channel. Why did she fail tonight? She herself didn't know the answer.

The sudden brake broke her thought chain and she opened her eyes. The surroundings looked similar. And then it dawned on her. This was the place she had met Sanket for the first time. Dhakuria Lake. She looked towards him. But he was already out and was coming her way to open the door. She caught his red eyes as the door opened. Opening the seat belt she got down from the car.

Jodha flinched as the violent closing of the door reached her ears.

"You wanted a quiet place", Sanket sneered,"Will this one be okay?"

"Please Sanket. Let's sit and talk", she started walking towards the benches kept along the path of the waterbody.

"Oh really! Listen Jo! We can't sit and talk anymore", he growled making Jodha stop in her way.

"So, what do you want to do? Shout and yell telling the whole world about your wife's infidelity?", Jodha's hands shot up in frustration.

"That's correct. I really feel like doing that. I want mom, dad to know about you and that b**tard."

"Mind your language Sanket! He has a name. A damn name and you should call him that!"

"F*cking name!", Sanket covered his face with his palms. "That was left Jo in our marriage. You reminding me about that a**hole, telling me he has a name!"

"You are being impossible Sanket! It is not as you think", Jodha's frustrated words rang in the air, "I am trying to forget him. Believe me."

"Ohh yeah! I can see that you are trying for the past nine months and yet you feel weak when he's in front of you", he mocked.

"Enough of these discussions Jo! I've had enough of these. I have given you enough time, enough love to forget him but it seems you don't want it that way. Today I realized it's all for nothing. So, let's end this charade before it turns any more bitter".

"Charade?", Jodha's perplexed face caused Sanket to close his eyes.

"Yeah. This charade of happy marriage. Let's end it."

"What do you mean?"

"Divorce", Sanket met her steady gaze with an equally steady one, "I can't live with a woman who loves someone else! So I need a divorce."

She felt the earth beneath her feet tremble as she took support from the branch of a nearby tree. Taking slow steps she reached the nearest bench and crashed into it. Her life was already out of control and now Sanket wanted a divorce. What will her parents say? How will they react? Where will she go?

Burying her face in her hands, Jodha sat there. She remembered the day when she had met Jalal for the first time in her college alumnae. He was not the established writer then with only one book to his credit. How they had exchanged numbers back then and how the romance had budded. She remembered how her family had opposed to her choice. They had told her how could she, being a Hindu Brahmin choose a Muslim life partner. In spite of her protests she was married off to Sanket, the perfect husband material in her father's eyes. Jodha felt her eyes tearing and now she opened them, letting the tear flow unabated.

How could she blame Sanket? He was not wrong. He had really tried. Tried to make her love him. Tried to make her forget him. But he had failed and today he wanted release. And she would give it to him. This was the least she could do for him.

It was after a long moment, that she got up from the bench, her eyes dry, the earlier tears nowhere in sight. She turned back only to see Sanket seating on the bench next to her, staring at the water with utmost concentration.

She walked up to his bench, "It's fine. Get the papers done and send them to me once they are ready. I'll sign them."

Sanket glanced back.

"So, our work's done here, right? So can I now go back. I've a lot to pack. Plus we have to break the news to your family. I know maa, baba will get hurt but there's no other option left.", she continued looking directly at Sanket without emotions clouding her eyes. Though in their nine months marriage she couldn't love Sanket but she has loved his parents more than her own. And now though she hated hurting them with the news, she knew she had to do this.

She had to wrong them to do right to their son.

"Hmm, I'll get them ready soon", Sanket nodded, his earlier anger nowhere in sight.

"Okay then. Bye. I'm leaving", Jodha addressed Sanket with a small smile that didn't reach her eyes.

She turned back only to be stopped by his voice, " Wait. Come with me in the car."

"No. It's okay. No need of formalities here. I'll have to walk alone from today and it's better if I get accustomed to it now. Isn't it?", Jodha answered without a backward glance and was soon out of the park boundary as Sanket looked on at the back profile of his wife, the most complicated woman he has met till date.

He sighed and prepared himself to break the news to his family. A long battle is left now.

Flashback ends..

Crosswords Book Store..
Kolkata, 2057

The push from the crowd broke her walk down the memory lane as the cool October breeze blew. Adjusting the tresses that had found their way out of the messy bun, she looked at the man standing on the dias. He was talking about his latest book, That October Night.

Her Jalal.. who was no more hers. Though she couldn't move on from him, he, on the other hand, seemed to have moved on.

He was standing their tall and proud with his wife Shazia Shadmani, the editor of all his books.

Happiness radiated from the glowing face of the couple. If media are to be believed, Jalal and Shazia had been dating for seven months and unable bear the distance any more, Jalal had proposed her on a windy night and the prompt response he got was a yes.

Amidst the glowing flashlights, Jodha fixed her eyes on the man. He looked older with his hair greying. Wrinkles had made their appearance, giving an aura of experience and knowledge around him.

His age was catching up with him, as was her case.

In spite of her ailing mother's warnings, Jodha had decided to go to the book launch party of India's numero uno writer Jalaluddin Mohammad.

How could she not go? After all this was the second time, the first one being exactly forty two years ago, that one of his books was being launched in Kolkata. And this time she had a personal invitation from Jalal...

Crosswords book store in College Square, famous for its heritage and history was chosen for the book launch.

Jodha looked at the crowd, busy in question answering session with the writer himself. The air inside the book store became suffocating as she saw the easy camaraderie between the love birds..

Finally, when the air inside became unbearable, Jodha got up from the chair and with a last glance at the happy couple, started walking towards the gate.

The air outside welcomed her and the lightings at the road, for the purpose of Durga Puja soothed her. She felt alive somehow.

"Maa was right. I shouldn't have come here tonight", with a shake of head, as if to remove the traces of Jalal from her memory, she walked down the road.

The crowd of Pandal hoppers were increasing with the passing time. And on top of that, a large number of book lovers were assembled at the Crosswords. She turned back once again only to find the guards and police officials trying hard to control the mob at the gate. Suddenly from the crowd, a known figure in blue denims and light blue check shirt caught her attention.

He was talking with a woman, elegantly dressed in navy blue and green viscose churidar kameez. Her long silky hair falling in graceful layers over her shoulder.

" Dad, I've bought the tickets", a young man in his thirties came up to them, "Mom come. Dad, you wait at the Square bus stop. We'll reach there soon. I'll just take mom in so that she can see the great Jalaluddin with her own eyes".

He winked at the couple in front and the lady tugged at his elbow in mock anger, "Dhruv, this is too much. I don't know what problem, he has with my favourite writer. But whatever he has is his matter. Why will I miss this golden opportunity to miss my Jalal"?

The lady smiled at the man as Jodha looked on.

" Come on mom! My Jalal! I mean seriously?"

"Leave it son. Take your mom to meet him. I'll be waiting", this time the man spoke with a curt voice.

" Oh come on Sanket! Don't be jealous! I'm yours only. Where will I go without you. After all we have to find the perfect bride for our son too!", the lady winked at Sanket as the latter smiled.

Jodha watched Sanket waving hand at his wife and son and then turning back with a smile on his face.

He was soon heading towards the College Square bus stop. Jodha looked on.

Why did fate play this cruel game with her? She didn't know. But she knew one thing. The two people in her life, who at different points had said that, their lives without her was impossible, were now happily married to other women. May be this was God's way of showing her the truth.

The forty two years that she had spent alone was for whom? Tonight she needed to ask herself and also needed to find the answer...

"Uski mohabbat ka silsila bhi kya ajeeb silsila tha..