SS: Sunshine After Rain - Re-posting Final Chapter page 18 Updated! - Page 8

Chapter 7

"Arnav Babu, what about the remaining land and other chattels?" asked the contractor Sandhu. Sandhu had once worked with Arnav's father for a very long time. He was also one of the most loyal people of Thakur Amar Singh Raizada and so naturally his loyalties fell towards his son as well.

"Uncle, I have already sold five hundred acres and I plan to keep the rest five hundred. Mohan Kaka has taken the responsibility of putting it on lease for irrigation and the rent from it can be used to maintain our Haveli. I don't want to sell the Haveli as Babey has specially requested to preserve it and even I don't want to transact since my great grandfather's built it and I don't think anyone can put a price on it." Arnav said as he leafed through the various registration documents.

"And have you settled everything else? Your father's other earnings and his Zamindari work?" Asked Sandhu

"I am taking most of the cash with me as I will require it in Vilayat, but some remains here. The whole nation is in a transformation phase and there are some legal bindings. Nonetheless, I have mostly settled everything else. And Lalaji's Zamindari work will be now overtaken by Mohan Kaka's sons."

There was a long pause where Arnav continued to look through his files and Sandhu sat quietly. "Are you sure Arnav Putar? Can nothing change your decision?"

Arnav sighed and closed the file. He kept it on the table as he spoke "I cannot live here, Sandhu Kaka. This place reminds me of so many things and I am not able to cope. Please Kaka, I need your support. This is difficult even for me."

Sandhu smiled gently at the young man and said "If this is what you want then I am with you, Arnav Putar. It's just hard to see everything falling apart in our village. First your father and now you..." he sighed wistfully.

Arnav kept quiet. He did not want to think about his father now. His death was something he could never bear to talk about. So he always chose to stay silent. The loss was too big and the gap in his heart too deep.

"Can I drop you to the farms? I am heading the same way" Sandhu asked, as he got up.

Arnav followed suit though tad slowly "Hanji.(Yes) I'll just let Babey know and join you outside" Arnav said and walked out of the Baithak.

Arnav's eyes wandered about in search of one person, who he knew would be waiting for him. Babey had gone to Gurdwara and it was only Khushi in the house. He saw her standing outside the Kitchen looking expectantly in the direction of Baithak.

"Sat Sri Akal, Babu Sahib" Khushi wished in a soft voice.

So he was still Babu Sahib. This irritated him. Why was she so quiet and formal?

"Sat Sri Akal" he wished rather tersely. She did not react and this incensed him even further.

Politely she stretched her hand holding a kada towards him "Please wear this. My Amma brought this for me from Sri Bangla Sahib. You are going to work after so many days. This will protect you" she whispered, looking down.

Arnav stared and did not attempt to take it from her. When she looked up, he glared at her. "Do you really want me to be safe or is this all a pretense?" he asked indigently and scowled.

She gasped and covered her mouth with her hand "What? Why are you saying this?"

"Because I think you really don't care. The moment I go, you'll forget ever existed. I don't think even my death will affect you" he snapped.

He instantly regretted his words as he saw tears filling her eyes and her face starting to lose all color. She quietly pressed the Kada in his palm and ran away, her stifled sob reaching him.

"Khushi..." he called after her but her door was shut.

As he turned around, he came face to face with a glowering Babey. Her hands perched on her hips as she yelled at him "Inge Gall Karida hai, Kudian naal?" (Is this the way to talk to girls?)

Arnav looked down, chagrinned of his behavior "Babey I... I..."

"What more do you want, Thibani? Haven't you already shattered her enough? Why don't you listen to me? I am your elder. I will know best for you" Babey said as one last feeble attempt.

"It's meant to be Babey. It's the right thing to do. For her..." Arnav whispered thinking of Shashi and his promise to him. He then turned away to walk out of the house.

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That night Arnav kept tossing and turning in his bed. It being a winter night, there was a natural halcyon everywhere - not even the crickets chirruping. But sleep remained elusive to him. Frustrated, he sat up fast and a wince escaped his lips. He hadn't been able to move smoothly in past whole month. The injuries had been deep and were now almost rehabilitated, but the laboriousness in his muscles and the lingering pain remained. He wasn't reposing properly at nights and that prolonged the recovery process. With a sigh, he stretched back in his soft bed again and stared at the high ceiling.

Through this past month - when he was handicapped by his injuries and pain - he had a major time with himself to reflect on his decisions. And he found himself, again and again, consenting to them. He had to take a decision for both of them - Khushi and himself. He knew she was forlorn and aggrieved by this evaluation, but it was only best for both of them. She is like a flower petal - so very fragile and innocent. She had already sustained profound harm at the hands of destiny and he did not want her to lead a life where he would be there to taint her happiness, constantly, with his ruminating presence. The baggage that came along with him will make her already fragile essence fade away into nothingness.

Things had changed and grown deep between them and neither he and nor could she deny it. Khushi was young and naive; she wasn't a pro at taking difficult decisions in life. If her mind and...heart refused to espouse the subtle shortcomings of life that would accompany him - it was his duty to make her understand. After all, he had promised her father that he would take care of her. It was his last promise to Shashi uncle - his father's best friend. This was the least he can do for them. If Khushi remained happy forever, then this short phase of gloom would pale away in comparison. She would be happy with someone better, someone stronger. And his father -and her own father- would want this for her, wouldn't they?

He had managed to refute and ignore Babey's pleadings. She had begged, beseeched, pleaded and threatened him, but nothing could change his decision. She had even refused to go away to Vilayat with him. But he had stood firm on his decision. And tomorrow he would go and leave Khushi to her Bhua's place. It was inevitable. His and Babey's flight was scheduled for the day after tomorrow morning, early from Delhi. This blissful phase of his life will end tomorrow. Yes, it was blissful, albeit it started in consequences to a tragedy. But they will have to part forever. The thought sent an icy twist to his heart but he ignored it, telling himself again that it was only for the best.

He got up from his bed with difficulty and slowly walked outside. It was cold with December nearing its end. He stood on the veranda and stared at the open skies. Then his eyes automatically moved to Khushi's room and he could see her room's lamp still on. Why she wasn't sleeping, he thought. He sighed and shook his head - did he really have to ask? She hadn't been doing anything properly. And he was really worried about her sinking health. That day - a month ago - when he had announced his decision, she had collapsed. And only he knew how helpless he had felt in that moment when he wasn't even able to move and she was unconscious and pale in front of his eyes.

She had cried in Babey's lap in front of him, not even trying to hide her vulnerability. She had not questioned him about taking this decision; just accepted it mutely, obediently. When Babey had fought and shouted at him, she had sat there silently - staring unseeingly into space. She had then mechanically got up from bed, refusing to even look at him and walked to her room. From that day till today, he hadn't seen more than a glimpse of her. He had been handicapped and she wasn't anymore bothering to visit him. Those few glimpses told him, what outline of once genial Khushi she has dissolved into. He turned his face away from her door and closed his eyes tight. Her pale face was again making his question his decision. She hadn't even attempted to fight... even once. Just took in everything. She hadn't even looked up in his eyes, to ask why?

He heard her door open and he turned around. He gazed at her, slowly taking in her slim form bathed in silvery moonlight. Her color as pale as the light falling on her... She wasn't covered, he noticed, as she shivered distinctly.

Her eyes widened as she saw him standing in front of her, looking at her keenly. Clearly, she hadn't expected him and her surprised question proved it "Babu Sahib, Tusi?" (Babu Sahib, you?)

Arnav did not say anything for a moment as he took in her listless and feeble form. "Khushi why aren't you, covered properly? It's so cold outside, you will fall ill" his voice was soft yet reprimanding.

He saw her instantly look down as she tightened her thin dupatta around herself and kept quiet.

Arnav's heart squeezed painfully to see her being so submissive and subdued. This wasn't his Khushi. This wasn't the Khushi he knew. She hadn't been like this even after her family's demise. Even then she had at least tried to talk and bounce back. Right now it looked like all fight had left her.

His throat felt clogged and painfully tight, suddenly. Why wasn't she talking? He cleared his throat and waited for a few seconds before speaking again "Khushi why aren't you sleeping? It is so late"

She then looked up at him. And, suddenly the tears he had been fighting gathered behind his eyes as her blank and dull eyes. The stagnant emotion threatened to break their restraints as he fought himself to take her in his arms and wipe all her grieves and worries away.

"Babu Sahib, I was looking for my jutis, the ones you got me for Gurpurav. I kept them carefully, but now I cannot find them now..." She said politely, her voice reverent. She was looking up, but her eyes were fixed on his broad chest rather than his eyes.

"Why don't you search for them in the morning, Khushi? It's dark now, you won't find them" he said.

He saw her hesitate as her glance once flickered to him and then back down. She had again started to twirl the dupatta around her slender finger - a sign of nervousness.

"What is it, Khushi?" he urged her gently and stepped a little closer to her.

Her bewildered gaze clashed with his as he neared her "I... I... woh... You... We will leave early tomorrow for Amritsar. I won't get time in the morning and... and I don't want to leave them here" She whispered looking down, her voice low and slightly cracking.

Arnav stared down at her bowed head, not able to say anything. After a long pause - fighting the sane, screaming part of his mind, fighting discretion - he very, very gently brought his hand up and cupped her chin. He tipped it up and saw tears swimming in her beautiful eyes. She did not resist his touch but looked directly into his eyes. Slowly he leaned down, pressing his forehead against hers and squeezed his eyes closed as tears finally found their surge.

Neither was able to say anything. They both kept standing in the chilly night, silently weeping as pristine rays fell on them, soaking them with its unsullied sheath. "I am sorry, Khushi but you have to understand that this is for your good. I want you happy and content in life. I know you will never be able to find it with me. I promised Shashi uncle that I will take care of you. I am not enough for you, Khushi. I am sorry" his low voice cracked as tears ran down his face.

Khushi did not attempt to move or even say anything as she wept and silently listened to his apology. As he moved back and wiped her tears away, she looked straight into his eyes and said softly "Will you promise me something, Arnav?"

His eyes widened and his heart thudded as he heard her taking his name for the first time. The joy he felt in that moment, listening to his own name was consummate like there was an eternal meaning to it.

"Anything, Khushi... Anything..." he whispered, desperate for her one command and he will lay his life at her feet.

"Please, don't risk yourself, Arnav. I will be able to breathe despite being away from you because then I will know you are there somewhere... alive. But if something happens to you... "She paused; as she tried to contain sobs "I won't be able to survive," she said looking straight into his eyes. Her soft somber gaze reflecting love, pain, and tenderness, seeped into his soul.

Before he could recover, she spoke again "Arnav I have always known your touch and more than that your essence. You know the day you saved me; you enveloped me in your arms, close to your warmth. And before passing out I remembered nothing but that warmth and those pair of arms. You know when I used to have nightmares... I was always stopped from seeing and facing the worst even in my dreams because something would always stop the danger from reaching to me. My subconscious had known, accepted and fallen in love with you even before my conscious mind did. I... I don't know when this happened. I was always waiting to find who saved me that day. Who made me glad that I survived even when I wanted to die right there with my family? And that day, on the day of Langar, I finally came to know. When you... you handed me the towel, when I was standing there exposed and cold - I felt that warmth again. You might find it funny Arnav, but I am attuned to your presence. It is something unusual but real... for me...

I know you are thinking for my best Arnav, for my happiness. You say you promised my Lalaji my happiness, but my Lalaji always used to say thatKhushleen my happiness lies in yours. And Arnav if my happiness is with you how could Lalaji's be in someone and something else? Love, life and happiness - everything is with you, Arnav; otherwise they hold no meaning to me. "

Arnav felt winded, his breath choked and his eyes wide. She had been keeping so much inside. And he thought he knew what the best was for her? The coils of emotions and the tumultuous love he felt towards her were suddenly too much for him. He saw her turn and walks back to her room, closing the door gently behind her.

The twilight was waiting to dissolve in the first rays of morning sun, bringing with itself a promise of a new day and a changing heart...

A/N: Nothing to say😆 Just waiting to hear from you guys

PS: Since I never got a chance to mention, my name is Pakhe😊