IshVeer FF: Of The Soulmates Chapter 53(Page 144) - Page 92

Originally posted by: .DarkandTwisty

That was absolutely brilliant! Yay they kissed☺️

Loved everything about this chapter..you capture their feeling so well👏

I'm totally addicted to this story..please update sooinsh😳

Originally posted by: Elvish_Hobbit

Hey, thank you, Effulgent. Welcome to the thread. 🤗

The parts that you selected were different to write about, you see. Often making me feel quite weak because of being emotionally draining. I love angst too but I think Ranveer (yep, more than Ishani) has suffered a lot and deserves peace and comfort. This chapter having so much to do with the matters that took me back to the era when the show was a gem and so was Ranveer became a bit hard to work on it in a composed way. Anyway, will not bore you with that.

Well, it's not possible to have a Ranveer in our lives so I love writing about him all the time and I think you should do the same. ⭐️⭐️

Thanks again, Effulgent. Writing about Ishani's feelings is the hardest thing right now and the reason you do know.

P.S. It's okay. I love essays. Have been obsessed with them since childhood. ⭐️

Originally posted by: Katniss07

Aye ! You updated the 45th chapter ! Shucks , me and my bad timings . Okay , so...um...I don't know what to say really , but I want to so to begin with after posting my previous comment I went back to the previous page and I saw MM's comment and 'THEY KISSED' written in bold *bangs head* , Elvish why always me ! 😭 Heck ! sara maza kharab ho gaya , I wanted to be surprised ! 🥺

The chapter was flawless ( when I read it the 2nd time ) ! You executed that part so well ,a BIG hug to you for that 🤗. In the beginning part Ranveer , his love is so intense , it gives him the pain as well as the strength to endure it too , his life is filled with darkness as nobody is there to understand him , there is no one with whom he can share his anguish with and only Ishani's presence & her happiness is the flicker of light in the pitch black which to extinguishes with the swish of cold and clammy blow of realization . Looking at him it seems as if pain is an inseparable part of his , some people are like this , they hide their torment with a smile and by making others happy in such an expert way that nobody is able to see what they truly feel or who they really are , but these people have their own way to escape from the dark ironically in the dark only because their remedy , their happiness resides in their heart. And before I completely loose the track wandering somewhere else like an idiot , let me come back 😛. ( If i sounded absurd , sorry , I myself don't know what I wrote 😆 ).

This chirkut ! Ugh...even though I miss him but whenever he does something annoying infront of Ranveer , I feel like throwing him off a cliff 😡 . But Ishani disconnected the call , our sunny is giving him the perfect treatment, which he deserves 😈. The way Ishani's popat happened in the canteen ,lol, she was so tensed and I was giggling shamelessly here XD , I love the impact Ranveer has on others and how he guesses Ishani's actions and stops something wrong from happening to her ❤️.

I liked the way in which Ishani's feet automatically led her to the person with whom she finds comfort in her miserable state. I feel bad when he tries to hide his pain and gives priority to her problems whenever she is in need and i'm happy that she has started to understand and live his pain ( a bit ) and knows that the way he provides a helping hand to her , he needs one too. 💔

Um...now coming to what I wanted to say ( "you've already said so much" that's what you are thinking isn't it ? see I can read minds 😎 😛 ) . Elvish , I should not say this I know but the kiss , uh , it didn't seemed right to me at this point of time , i mean it was like a hitch in the flow of your story , it was quite sudden. Wait , don't get me wrong please , this was what I felt when I read it first time , but when I read it 2nd time I thought maybe this shock ( it really was , when I read about the kiss in MM's comment I missed falling from the chair believe me ) was necessary for the upcoming events to take place , the chirkut coming to London , marriage thingy , Ishani's realization etc. And I have faith in you , you'll surely show something good and completely acceptable so I'm okay. 😃😃 And that kiss ☺️ ☺️ , Oh ! I'm feeling hawt now XD , Elvish that kiss was beautiful , no uneasiness nothing while reading it , its another thing that I was blushing so badly that now my cheeks are hurting ☺️ ☺️ ☺️ , shit ! I'm repeating again , you are jinxing our brains with your lovely writing and keep doing this please , I love getting lost and mesmerized like this.

Lastly that guilt of Ishveer was so stinging , poor people . Ishani i guess somewhat realized after this incident that she loves him but what and how will she do now is scaring me a bit 😕. And Ranveer , deep down he knows that she loves him but this seemed so impossible to him that he is not able to accept the truth, not to forget that-ishani-marrying-chirkut-thing , his breakdown in the end completely justified what his love actually is ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ and i don't think I need to describe his love , it's beyond description , couldn't be understood by words but can be felt through his actions.😳😳

It was a lovely chapter dear , you also achieved what you dreaded so much , congratulations on that ! It shows how much you've grown as a writer ⭐️⭐️, keep writing and keep learning new things , achieving new heights and keep entertaining us like this 🤗.

PS : Chirkut will remain kamina right ?? 😕 😕 I'm asking this because I felt like this in the end and during chirag-Ishani conversation too so thought of asking . It's actually good to see people changing but Chirag jaisa insan kamina hi accha lagta hai. 😛

Double PS : I didn't realized that I wrote so much ! Apologies for this but it happens when you are overwhelmed ( especially to me 😛 ) and this chapter deserved it , sorry if I've bored you with my kachar-kachar , pachar-pachar 😆.

Chapter 46

Ishani woke up, her heart feeling an ache but the rays of the sun falling on her face timidly in the early morning, filtering through the red curtains provided enough courage to turn over. Turning her back to the other side she saw Ranveer, lying peacefully by her side. A shadow of sadness crossed her face but it disappeared as soon as it had come and she smiled. She remembered herself feeling guilty and terrified, but could not remember why she felt so, and it seemed a long time had passed, and a soft sigh left her lips. She could stare at Ranveer for the rest of the day like this, or even the whole life had he not moved a bit. Ishani expected him to wake up and say something. It felt it had been eternity since she found him so close to her. With the thought Ishani moved closer to him and placed her palm on his forehead, gently caressing and bringing it down to his cheek. As Ishani touched him his skin felt cold and a metallic clink was heard somewhere below the window as though someone was honing the knives. It felt distracting and his skin grew colder as she ran her fingers across Ranveer's face. Gradually, to Ishani's frightful astonishment he seemed unbearably cold, as cold as the frost in the dead of the winter when no fire is capable of effacing the harsh cold. "Ranveer!" Ishani cried but he did not move. The metallic sound intensified as Ishani took Ranveer in her arms and started rubbing his palm, but to her horror there seemed to be only a vague shadow of Ranveer that began to fade away as though being swayed away by the gentle yet stern blows of a crude air. "No, NO!" she screamed, but words were not let out of her throat and the sun seemed to have hidden behind the gloomy curtains of unfathomable darkness. She yelled, cried but everything she said was buried underneath the heavy darkness that she saw. The sound around of the knives increased and she could hear someone screaming painfully but her feet did not move. Her voice did not reach to the voice as helplessness overwhelmed her and soon she was falling in a horrifying oblivion from where there was no escape.

Ishani's phone rang loudly as she lay there, murmuring something in her sleep, clutching the pillow by her side tightly as though afraid to let someone go. It took 15 minutes and 20 calls to wake her up. Ishani sprang to her feet out of breath, sweating heavily and her eyes searching for someone. She looked around. "It was a dream," she whispered, as the horror of the nightmare returned back to her and she sat, her head in her hand. She looked about her once again and realized she was not in the same place she believed to be few minutes ago and gave a huge sigh of relief. The sun was out and a warm air blew across stirring the trees lightly. All the memories of the last night rushed back as she softly brought her feet to the floor, the floor sending shivers down her spine.

Ishani tried to avoid thinking of anything that would remind her of Ranveer but her mind only wandered back to her dream, him vanishing before her eyes and what they had shared few hours before. She suddenly remembered her phone was ringing and she had forgotten to pick up the call. The number was new and whilst dialing back she was informed that she was to arrive the hall soon to see the newly wedded couple off as they were to leave for India today itself.

Ishani hurried herself to get ready as soon as possible and arrived at the marriage hall within 20 minutes. Sally and Puneet stood performing their final rituals while Ishani could see Sally had been teary-eyed but a glow of happiness was not hidden yet. Ishani's eyes searched for Ranveer. One glimpse of his would have been better for her but he was nowhere to be seen. Ishani walked upto Rishi who stood in a corner with some of his friends.

"Rishi," Ishani said and gestured him to come towards her. "Have you seen Ranveer?" she asked.

"Not yet," Rishi said. "I've been calling him as well but he hasn't picked up my phone. He is not in his room too. Most often when he doesn't take any calls he wants to be remained undisturbed."

Ishani's worries deepened and she looked around once again but no sign of his. Her heart seemed to be freezing and eyes turned misty. Ishani came out of the hall looking around, hoping to find him but still there was no sign of his. It was after 15 minutes when Ishani saw Ranveer emerging from the crowd in the same attire she saw him yesterday: black jeans, sky blue tee and a brown jacket. Her heart skipped a beat at his appearance as she hid herself in the corner, out of his sight while Ranveer came further greeting few guests, often smiling although reluctantly. She gave a sigh of relief when he went beyond the pillar stood by. Ishani then came forward and joined in the crowd of the guests quietly, her eyes never leaving Ranveer.

There came a moment when Ishani suddenly caught him staring at her and at being caught he embarrassingly withdrew his gaze away. Ishani now saw his face clearly: tired; and his eyes being quite red as though he had not slept the whole night. She wanted to go to him and say something but felt afraid to do so. Instead she chose to stay in a corner like she was. The bride and groom were ready to set out for their another destination as they finished the final rituals pleasantly and headed off towards the car that awaited them.

"I want to talk to you," Ishani said coming further as the guests left, leaving an almost empty hall behind.

"I"I will talk to you later," Ranveer said and followed the crowd.

"No, stop!" Ishani said, holding him by his elbow. "It's urgent."

Ranveer stopped for a while and turned towards Ishani. "What is it?" he said.

"I was worried about you."

"You don't have to," said Ranveer curtly and moved away.

"Listen to me," Ishani said and followed him. "Don't do this."

Ranveer looked at her questioningly and Ishani answered, "What happened yesterday""

"I don't want to talk about it, Ishani. Let me go."

"I want to apologize to you for that."

"You already did."

"But you haven't yet forgiven me, have you?"

Ranveer looked back at her guiltily. "Please understand, Ishani. You will never understand this. There are many things you'll never understand."

"I will if you try to make me understand," Ishani said, moving towards him. "I don't know what it is to be Ranveer Vaghela but I want to understand a part of him."

Ranveer shook his head. "That's something you will never get to know. We have talked over this matter already"yesterday, and I see no point in discussing it again. You have to move on in your life and for that you must leave Ranveer behind."

"How?" Ishani asked.

Ranveer was speechless. He knew Ishani had to move on but how could he tell her how to do it? Did Ishani really enjoy hurting him again and again? "Well, you'd get used to it once I'm gone."

"And where exactly are you going?" Ishani asked, her eyes observing him closely.

"It's you who is going so I am automatically out of your life, am I not?"

"You do love it"playing riddles with me, confusing me and torturing me, don't you?"

"All my life I have only tried to keep you away from all this," Ranveer said and Ishani shuddered.

"Why don't you listen to me then? Why don't you forgive me then?"

Ranveer did not know what to say. He did not understand how to say anything. After the last night's embarrassing encounter he couldn't meet his eyes with hers and what was she supposed to apologize for when he was the one who had given in?

"Ishani, it's time we should be going," Ranveer said at length.

"Weren't we to leave tomorrow?"

"We need to go today. If you're coming I'll be waiting in the next two hours or I have a few meetings to attend today and I cannot miss them,"

Ishani knew he would not listen to her anymore and she could not understand what was to do now.

"It would be rude of us if we leave like this."

"I'm very busy," Ranveer said curtly. "If you want to stay, stay. I'm leaving."

"As I said, I'm here," Ishani said, as Ranveer and she waited in the airport. He was surprised to see her.

"I thought you weren't coming," Ranveer said.

"I changed my mind."

"Very quickly."

"I had to." Ishani shrugged her shoulders and Ranveer did not say anything. She tried to appear cheerful but it faltered quickly knowing Ranveer was not interested in any kind of conversation right now. He simply stared in front of him vacantly and that made it harder for her to even move. It felt her one single action could break the string of his thoughts and that could not be a good idea. Ishani sat silently, closed her eyes and let herself sink in the realm of the shuffling memories once again. They felt better than the reality in that moment. The plane took off and Ishani again stirred slightly with fear but this time she managed to keep herself composed and nestled quietly on the seat beside Ranveer.

"What are the meetings that you talk about that made you leave the wedding so early?" Ishani said, trying to efface the awful awkwardness that ensued between them.

"It's from a group from Manchester," Ranveer said; Ishani waited for him to say something more for but he kept quiet.

"Anything more?" she said, looking upwards towards him.

"No."

"I want to talk to you something. It's important," Ishani said. Ranveer looked at her and it was an enough gesture to understand that he was ready to listen to her. "I saw a nightmare," Ishani began, unsure of how to add the details and decided to omit them completely.

"What was it?"

"I saw you," she gulped. "You were there with me and suddenly you vanished in the air. I tried holding you on but it was too late. It was only a matter of seconds and you disappeared."

"Relax. It was just a dream," Ranveer assured her. Even as he said that, Ishani noticed a shadow cross past his eyes.

"It felt so real," she whispered slowly, trying to keep herself composed.

"They often do. It happens to me, too; but they are as unreal as dragons in the old tales. You surely don't think they come from the stories and become real, do you?"

Ishani wished she could trust him, but a feeling of uneasiness wouldn't go.

"Don't over think of the matter; it only ruins your peace of mind." Ranveer smiled.

She wanted to ask if he really followed this in his life but didn't.

"I hate these nightmares," she said, straightening herself up and looking into his eyes.

"For God's sake, Ishani," Ranveer said. "No nightmare is lovable. Right?"

She smiled. "That's right. But..."

Ranveer looked at her questioningly. "But?"

"Nothing." Ishani shrugged of the matter, deciding not to trouble him more and Ranveer too asked no more questions.

The rest of the journey passed in silence. Ishani kept staring out of the window: the only sight was of the clouds rolling over and passing briskly through the thick air in a blink. Ishani and Ranveer came out of the airport and headed towards their respective destinations.

"I'll see you in a while," Ranveer said, and pointed towards a white car. "There's your car waiting. Right now go home first."

"What about you?"

"I'm to go for something important right now."

The journey to Edinburgh and back might have been short but it was exceptionally tiring. Ishani felt an uneasiness taking over her senses and the thought of Chirag coming to see her felt no good. She wished she could stop herself from feeling what she did but all her efforts were in vain. The afternoon sun glided down and began to blend in the red horizon but things for Ishani did not change. For past one year she had learnt to make peace with the most unpleasant of the feelings but today they seemed not to end. She picked up her phone and dialed a number. The soft successive rings were answered within 15 seconds.

"Hello," Gauri's voice echoed softly, and Ishani smiled.

"Hello, Gauri di," Ishani said. "How are you?"

"I'm good." Ishani sensed a familiar suspicion in Gauri's voice as if she knew the misery Ishani was going through. "How are you?" Gauri asked.

"I'm good, too," Ishani lied. "Can you please come in a more isolated place for a while?"

"Sure," Gauri said, and Ishani could hear gentle footsteps of her cousin coming to a halt. "I'm alone now. Is everything alright?"

"Do you know anything about Chirag and his parents' conversation with Maa and Baa? They wanted to talk about our marriage."

"Oh, yes!" Gauri said feebly. "Yesterday Chirag and his parents came here and they have decided a date for your wedding. I have been on my visit to Baa these days. And Baa was very happy with your and Chirag's marriage preparations now going on. I'm surprised. Falguni kaki was happy too but not as happy as she should have been. Probably she is missing kaka?"

Ishani's heart sank. "And what is the date by the way?" Ishani asked, avoiding the rest of the worries.

"It's a surprise for you. We're not allowed to reveal anything. It's Baa's order."

"Gauri di," Ishani said, unable to hold anymore the gush of emotions. "I want to tell you something. I"I met Ranveer."

"What?" Gauri gasped. "When? Where?"

"He's here, in London."

Another cry of surprise left Gauri's lips and Ishani quietly continued. "RV is Ranveer. Last time when we met I couldn't tell you about him but he's been here since last two and a half years."

"Ishani?" Gauri said, as if not sure what more to say.

"He's still the same," Ishani said, smiling pensively. "Money, status, fame"nothing has changed him. He's still the same Ranveer I knew. But""

"What is it, Ishani?"

"I guess nothing to worry about. But I can't leave him."

"Don't be stupid."

"I don't know why everyone calls it stupidity. Even he thinks the same," Ishani said, shrugging her shoulders demurely.

"Because you are not to stay there," Gauri said, stressing each of her word.

"I thought you would understand me...what I feel."

"Ishani," Gauri's tone softened. "You are about to get married. And you do remember the accusations on Ranveer, right?"

"All this time, I've been with him and he has never ever looked at me like that. Being a woman myself it's easy to see with what intent men look at you and I have never felt afraid in his presence. You know what? When he looks at me it feels everything freezes in that moment and it all is for me. All the assurances, happiness and everything"I see there in his eyes. Those eyes promise me what I long for but am too afraid to ask for because happiness sometimes looks so temporary...as though a house of cards."

"What are you talking about, Ishani?" Gauri said, bewildered at Ishani's revelations. "Do you understand what you're talking about?"

"I feel I'm selfish," Ishani said in a broken voice and with the same continuity as though she had not heard Gauri. "He is my friend, my best friend. All these years I couldn't learn to live without him and now it's impossible. It's like"I don't know what I will do without him."

"Ishani, do you know what you feel? And no one in our family will ever accept what you want. It's better you come back soon. For God's sake you are to be married in a few weeks. Your friendship with Ranveer was not accepted because he used to be our servant and it is not going to change. Not for those who matter. Baa and Falguni kaki are not going to approve anything you're talking about. There is nothing there except hurt."

Ishani shook her head to herself. It was not so. "You don't understand," she said to Gauri and Gauri answered back.

"No, it's you who doesn't understand this. Baa and Falguni kaki will never accept that you"" but before Gauri could finish her words Ishani heard someone calling her cousin's name. "It's Romil, Ishani; I will talk to you later."

"Gauri di," Ishani said, "it's a request that you don't broach anything of our conversation to anyone. Not even to Romil and Maa. Please?"

"Don't worry," Gauri answered. "But you should think about the decisions that you're going to make and think twice about Chirag; he has been behaving weird lately." Gauri disconnected the call and left, leaving Ishani to fight the puzzles on her own. What did she mean by thinking about Chirag? Ishani should have liked to ask but Gauri was in hurry.

The conversation with Gauri had been nearly fruitless or at least not as satisfying. Why nothing in the world provided any answers to her unraveling questions? Was Ranveer's status as a servant' so necessary that people still refused to acknowledge who he was today"even Gauri? Things would have been better for everyone had she herself not been so foolish.

Suddenly amidst her thoughts Ishani remembered her own words that she told Gauri a few minutes ago but had not been able to finish, for they felt too incomplete to be said at all. As a woman she knew how men gazed at her and most of the times she would feel uncomfortable"so uncomfortable that at times she would wish she wasn't there; but with Ranveer it wasn't so. She felt protected, comforted, and loved. He had accepted her for who she was years ago and never questioned her like the eyes of the society that held only contempt in them because a man had left her mother when she needed him the most.

Ranveer had been mad at her since last night for a mistake he thought he had committed when the entire fault was hers. How could he ever touch Disha? The question rung in her incessantly as Ishani shuddered for a moment and leaned her back on the bed gently as she lay there, motionless, staring at the white ceiling vacantly. Tears again escaped her eyes and she did not bother wiping them away. The only conclusion that she could form from all the ends was: Ranveer was framed. Accused by someone else for the things he never did; and she had believed all the lies spoken against him. She had failed. Failed as a friend to him and let him go away when he needed her the most. Ishani hugged the pillow to her bosom tightly and wept ceaselessly for hours. The melancholy evening melted into a somber night and her sobs still continued, mingled in the darkness of her room. She felt helpless and uncertain on what she was to feel, for any thought felt too small to comfort her. Whether it was a moment to grieve or celebrate, she did not know. All the while she had wanted the answers but tonight the realization of the truth only engulfed her into a deranged guilt, and painful sensation reminding her of the moments that were gone forever.

The moon waxed outside the window and a gentle breeze whistled across the trees quietly. But Ishani was oblivious to all this, for her mind could only replay the night Ranveer and his family was thrown ruthlessly out of her house and she had let him go away. She wished if time could be turned back she would make everything alright. But it was too late now. She never knew whether Ranveer was mad at her or not. When she met him for the first time in this city all he had done was comfort her and help her to get out of the grief that her father's demise had caused and lingered for so long whittling the tales of painful heartaches everyday.

Why didn't he hate her all the while she deserved that? She should have asked him but she felt a reproach taking over her like a dark shadow looming in the sheer gloom. She was unworthy of everything he had done for her. Everything. Ishani did not realize but there came a time when her eyes drooped quietly in a light slumber and her mind again returned back to those halcyon days when little did she know of her future and its troublesome hardships.