Hey, guys. Next update is here. Won't say I'm nervous anymore, cause I know that sounds annoying now. xD Chapter 37
The next morning Ranveer found himself in the familiar surroundings waking up but unlike before he felt his heart heavy and head aching. The sun had not yet come out although the crimson glow of the dawn spread itself over the town delightedly. He got up, slowly, his back leaning on a soft pillow as he looked upwards, eyeing towards the main door. The light of the passage outside the room was lit and someone talking in whispers could be heard. Ranveer tried to stand up but realized he had no strength which forced him again on the soft cushions backward and he reluctantly gave in, waiting for the visitor to show up.
Almost 10 minutes later Ranveer saw Puneet advancing towards him, worriedly looking at him. Ranveer's eyes fell on the watch nearby which showed 5 O' Clock. It was too early for anyone to visit him in that hour.
"Is everything alright?" Ranveer asked Puneet, in his usual strict tone.
"Everything except you, sir. I'm sorry but you should not be drinking too much," Puneet answered politely.
Ranveer looked slightly troubled as he tore his gaze away from Puneet's. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to...you know," Ranveer said, fumbling. "Where is everyone?"
"Your parents are sleeping in their room. They just left, 15 minutes before you woke up."
Ranveer looked embarrassed. "And who got me here? I don't remember returning home on my own," Ranveer said.
"Of course not, sir. You wouldn't either. It was Rishi who found you in your cabin, unconscious, and rushed you back home as soon as possible. The doctor was called who again mentioned you must avoid alcohol," Puneet explained.
Ranveer sighed wearily. "I'm sorry, Puneet. Once again because of me all of you had to go through this. Did Maa say anything?"
"No, she was the quietest tonight. Probably she found you hopeless?" Puneet said.
Ranveer shook his head as he chuckled. "I'm such a pain, am I not?"
"No, sir," Puneet answered kindly. "Probably anyone at your place would be the same, or maybe the worse."
"No. I've been a fool all along. I should avoid many things I do," Ranveer said, and picked up a new bottle of wine placed on the table nearby.
"Don't, sir, you just promised something," Puneet ejaculated.
Ranveer smiled guiltily as he remembered his words few moments ago and his another attempt to make things worse for others. He quietly kept the bottle aside like a child whilst Puneet's gaze followed his actions.
"Happy?" Ranveer smiled.
"Extremely," Puneet answered. "You are not to come to the office today, sir. Your mother has given some strict orders before she left."
"No, how can I not?" Ranveer cried. "You know about our new contract...I cannot miss that."
"I'm sorry, sir." Puneet shrugged his shoulders. "You would have to take a break for this day and don't worry about the deal. We'll handle it."
Puneet left the room giving Ranveer his medicines needed at the moment. Ranveer stared out of the window silently as the birds by now chirped with the sweet voices and the sun beamed joyously with the burst of his first rays. Ranveer would have liked to take a visit to the office in a few hours but the thought looked too tough to be fulfilled in that hour, for a weakness he had not experienced before took over him and he fell back again as he tried to get up for a little stroll outside his room. He groaned lightly and remained still for a while until he was able to take control of himself once again. Once again the memories of the last night flashed back absorbing down all his energy and sanity with which his mind was freed for a while in his drunken state. Tears again burned in his eyes which he immediately wiped away as though their presence brought the mockery filled message of weaknesses. Weak. Yes, this is what Ishani had said to him. He was not weak, he thought to himself, and if she could see him now she would know she was wrong all along about him. Ranveer tried shifting his attention away from her memories as they became too profound by the passing minutes but found himself again swirling amidst the cold, deserted, abandoned realm of his soul which was yet unvisited by anyone he knew.
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Ishani tried to engage herself in the living which was a part of her once; it felt harder to go back to the old life after moving on from this forever. She visited the servants' quarters the next morning where until few years back Ranveer lived with his parents but now it was occupied by two young siblings, one of them worked for the family while another one being in his mid teen years helped his brother in the household work as well as went to a local school; although no one paid for his education except his brother unlike her father had done for Ranveer. Ishani was surprised to see at times how nothing had changed for her family even after all the devastating realities having hit them harder many a times: Baa still could beat either of the siblings up and pretend to have done no wrong at all; her mother still cared not about any of them except paying them their wages, though she somehow was conscious of respecting them slightly more, and their salaries were increased than before. Devarsh and Prateek having joined the family business since last 6 months showed no change at all because they still remained as mischievous as ever which she thought was a good thing.
Disha refused to meet her eyes with Ishani. Whenever Ishani saw her Disha would steal a small smile and walk away, again pretending as if nothing has happened, or she did not see her sister.
"Disha," Ishani called her, as she walked out of her room, with a stylish bag in her hand, in the afternoon. Disha stopped dead in between and forced a small smile on her lips which Ishani could easily understand.
"Yes," she replied back.
"You're going somewhere? Don't you remember you had promised me to see Manas today? You said he's to leave early," Ishani said.
"Oh, Ishani," Disha said, carelessly. "Sure we will see him but now I'm leaving. Actually Manas himself is taking me on a date."
"Date!" Ishani smiled, "good going, Disha. Seems your Manas is very romantic, is he?"
Disha smiled slyly as she turned back, but stopped again when Ishani called her name. "Yes?" she said, hurriedly.
"Disha, look, I am your sister," Ishani began cautiously, "and like always whenever I say anything it's going to be for your better future. Do you get that?"
Disha nodded, but did not look into her sister's eyes.
"Does Manas know what happened two years ago here? Between you and..." Ishani did not say anything more while Disha shook her head.
"What should I tell him, Ishani? Only I'll be misunderstood without any fault," Disha cried.
"Why will you be wronged?" Ishani said, "Manas loves you, right? He'd certainly understand you, then. I'm not here to lecture you, Disha, but do you think you're telling him or I should do the honors when we meet?"
"No, no," Disha squeaked, immediately, "I will let him know myself when I feel the time is right."
"'Time is right'?" Ishani repeated, crossly. "When do you think is that to happen?"
Disha looked at the floor. "I...oh, yes. I need time, Ishani," she murmured.
"Cool," Ishani said. "I will wait for you to tell him. I don't want any trouble this time for you for the reasons you know very well, and if you create one trouble, I swear, I'm there to tell him everything before I go back. You can leave." Despite Ishani's polite and humble tone Disha looked afraid but Ishani hoped her sister could gather courage to speak the truth.
Ishani returned to her room, feeling awkward, and worse at the thought of feeling so in her own house where she had spent most of her life. Every corner of the place had a strange air in it with a murky loneliness lurking over. For the first time in her life her own secret den did not help her as it too possessed the same emotion. What she found dismal was that the room had been cleaned down and nearly all of her old belongings had been given away. She did not feel like arguing anymore, for answers to all her questions were the same, or having the same gist, which were tiring.
It was sometime in the evening, Ishani heard a knock on the door and her jaw dropped in sudden surprise at her sister, Gauri's appearance, who now with a young baby in her arms and an undeniable glow on her pretty face entered her room gracefully.
"Gauri di!" Ishani exclaimed as her sister advanced further, smiling genially.
"So glad to see you back, Ishani. Do you know how much we missed you all this time?" Gauri said, as she hugged Ishani tightly.
"So did I," Ishani returned, with a smile. "How are you, di? What's his name?" Ishani looked at the baby sleeping peacefully in his mother's arms.
Gauri sighed. "There is much going on. Where should I begin from? First of all, I want to apologize for not informing you about but we wanted it to be a surprise for you when you came back for your marriage, but now you are here it's a surprise already, to me. Shashank, his name is Shashank. We were blessed with him 1 month ago." Gauri said, but her tone changed further as she spoke in a low voice, "I heard, Ishani. Mr. Zaveri was never like this. It's still unbelievable."
The topic which Ishani avoided talking all along was finally back into focus and Ishani thought of facing it this time round instead of letting it go in the darkness forever.
"I know, di. He was never like that...dark, ruthless or cruel, and when Papa was no more I thought he was there like all the time but he couldn't be," Ishani said and for the next several minutes, at Gauri's insistence, Ishani narrated the whole story to her, avoiding Ranveer's name all the time.
"So," Gauri said, at last, "we are not told this final truth. Why?"
"RV believes it is better to avoid this personal matter in front the media and he is in no favor of playing tit for tat games against Zaveri uncle."
"So generous of him," Gauri remarked.
"I know," Ishani said. "He's like that."
"Strange," Gauri said. "I can't believe you just smiled, Ishani."
Ishani looked confused at her cousin's remark who added further, "We've been talking for so long but saw this genuine, real smile on your face now. Ishani, by the way who is this RV who has kept himself away from the world so far, and why? Ever since I heard his name from Romil I have been curious to know about him but Romil says no one has seen him yet and those who did do not reveal his identity. Why?" Gauri said.
"He's just like you and me. The world admires him for his name; that's it. And I'm sorry, I cannot myself explain more than this. Perhaps a time will come when everyone will know and see him before themselves. He's angry with the world, that's it," Ishani answered.
"Did you meet Chirag?" To Ishani's dismay Gauri asked, changing the topic once again.
Ishani shook her head. "He hasn't called me up yet."
"Did you call him?"
Ishani shook her head again and sighed. "I didn't."
"I can't believe this," Gauri said. "He's your fianc and you two are meeting after two years! How can you be so careless, Ishani."
"Di, please," Ishani returned. "Ever since I have been here, something else is running in my head and I cannot keep it away from myself."
"Ranveer, isn't it? It's him," Gauri said while Ishani's eyes welled up with hot tears as she nodded. "No one talks about him here and even Romil avoids talking about him."
"How strange it is when your one mistake defines you completely and all your previous decency is thrown away like it never existed. Why?"
"You still miss him," Gauri said, sympathetically. "Few people can't stay with us forever."
"Can we please stop talking about this?" Ishani said, fighting with her own self knowing defeat awaited her at the end when Gauri stopped in between.
"I'm sorry, Ishani, I did not mean to make you feel uncomfortable," Gauri said.
"It's not your fault. It's alright." Ishani smiled, parting her gaze away from Gauri's.
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Ishani's talks with Gauri left her disturbed for the whole day. She tried calling Chirag afterwards who remained unavailable till evening with his call being received by a girl who claimed to be Chirag's secretary and informed that he was out of the town for a week and wouldn't be available for the long. Ishani could not deny the sudden comfort she had felt at the moment and for some reasons she for the first time did not feel guilty like most of the times before. She felt free yet suffocated by a feeling enchanting over her soul, deep down battering her to the pieces, and yet comforting her in a way she had never felt before.
It was half past 9 when Ishani's eyes fell on her phone and her fingers automatically dialed a familiar number, a part of her making several failed attempts to restrain herself; and before she could be aware of anything, she heard Ranveer's voice speaking on the other side.
"Hello, Ishani," he said slowly. "How are you?"
"Uh, I'm...I'm fine," Ishani answered back, flustered. "How are you?" Ishani could not help but believe this moment to be a dream, for the image of a deranged Ranveer from the two nights before was still fresh in her mind, and she could not expect him to talk to her so calmly after that.
"I'm well," he answered. His voice and manners were quieter and gentler than usual which deep down frightened her. Few moments fled by as an awkward silence ensued between them until Ishani broke it again.
"I had to come here suddenly," she said, hesitantly, feeling uneasy, "but I will come back soon."
"Hmm," was his answer. Ishani flinched as his silence felt unbearable to her, gradually stabbing her like a splinter prickling in, painfully, for he remained silent, not beginning any conversation from his own side.
"I think I should be leaving now, Ranveer. Take care of yourself, please," Ishani said, to which Ranveer only answered with a small click from the other side suggesting he had disconnected the call. She never meant to say anything wrong and always was left surprised by a mystery: why she went speechless all the time she found him in front of her? No answer.
Ishani gave a deep sigh. Something felt wrong, wrong not because of the arguments they had had but something more, she thought. Despite the distance she felt whilst talking to Ranveer she found something intimate, painful sensation that could not be described in words but she knew it was there, existing, growing, tearing her every moment.
She saw the moon rising up high above the trees in the garden, glowing brilliantly, and her heart made a silent prayer asking for the well being of a heart that, years ago, had been crushed underneath very roof she stood in that moment.
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