Imperfectly Perfect [FF, ThaHaan] - updated, pg.15!! - Page 2

Hello guys! 🤗

First of all, I'd like to thank everyone who left me a little comment and liked the prologue 😉 I hope you will keep liking the upcoming parts! Also, I'm not going to send out pms, this time, as I think the few people here following this story will notice the update - but if anyone wants a pm, next time, let me know 😊

By the way, I added a title pic on the first post - do have a look and let me know how you like it!


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01
Dying bit by bit

"What do you think you are doing?!"

Bihaan stopped mid-motion, the tray he had been carrying was hovering mere inches over the table, and closed his eyes tightly. It hurt. The icy sharpness in that voice that had always held love for him, cut deep into his already bleeding heart, leaving another, untended wound. He took a deep breathe, willed his left hand to stop trembling and finally, put the tray down.

Kneeling on the floor, he took the plates containing samosas, vegetables and two rotis from the tray and placed the glass of water right next to the food. It smelled heavenly, a mix of spices, oil and bread.

"You haven't eaten anything since yesterday. You must be hungry, Bauji."

"I didn't accept food from mother or Vasundhra," Balwinder huffed. "Why would I accept it from your hands?"

A fair point. "I know you are upset," Bihaan sighed and looked up at his father who was leaning back in his favourite couch, eying him angrily. "But letting your anger out on the food is not an option, is it, Bauji?"

Balwinder regarded him silently, calculating, as if he were trying to read right through him. Sometimes, Bihaan was sure that his father was able to do just that- know his inner most secrets without him ever needing to bring them on his tongue. But not this time. This was different because he had forcefully closed the pages to his inside, and the effort of keeping them closed was exhausting - but necessary.

"You know," Balwinder said and averted his gaze simultaneously. "Once upon a time, hearing you call me Bauji made me feel like the proudest man on Earth. Today, it sounds like a curse."

Damn. Bauji knew how to hit his traget and said target was Bihaan's very soul. It shook with the force of the words, the impact cutting off his breathing and making him gasp, shocked. Had Bauji put a real bullet through his chest, it would have been a lot more bearable.

His new life had started with 'Bauji' - the man hadn't just given him a family to call his own, he had gifted him a soul, a strong, loyal, loving one. And was trying to damage it himself, now.

Bihaan turned completely toward his father, embraced his right leg and pressed his forehead against his knee like he used to do when he was little and something had upset him. His eyes were burning with unshed tears. "Don't say that, Bauji! I'm ready to take any punishment from you, but please, don't punish me this harshly!"

"Harsh?" Balwinder scoffed mockingly. "This is nothing compared to what you did to all of us! To this family! To what you did to that poor girl whose dreams you shattered in your blind ignorance!"

I did it for mother. The sentence was burning on the tip of his tongue but he swallowed it. No. He couldn't reveal this- he couldn't betray his mother like this. Even if her ways seemed wrong, she did everything out of love - and it wasn't as if he was completely innocent. He had tried to break the marriage, so what did it matter that it had been Vasundhra who actually had managed to do so?

"I did it for Dhruv," he whispered hoarsely.

"You ruined his life for his own sake?" The sarcasm was sharp and hurtful. "And what about Thapki betiya? Did you think about her even once?"

No. There had only been his mother and her tears and desperate pleas, blinding him to everything else. His cheek still burnt when he thought about Thapki and with it, an immense flood of guilt always threatened to drown him. He was trying to learn to lock away every thought concerning her- to no avail.

"I know, I-" He interrupted himself, lifted his head so that he could press his cheekbone against his father's knee and stare up at him. "How can I make you forgive me?" Your fury is killing me day by day.

"Forgiveness?" A small, sardonic smile adorned Balwinder's lips. "The day Thapki betiya forgives you, I will forgive you, as well, Bihaan." That said, he shrugged off Bihaan and stood up, walking toward the staircase, food long forgotten.

Bihaan watched his back, a single tear leaking out from the corner of his left eye. "So, be it."

****

"So, what are you going to do, bhai?"

Bihaan leant back on his elbows which he had put one stair above the one he was sitting on. He could feel Paan's inquiring gaze burning on him and sighed tiredly. "I have no idea. If I go to apologize... I'm sure Maa won't like it. And I don't think I will be forgiven."

"But as long as you are not, Bauji will stay upset with you," Paan pointed out unneccessarily.

Bihaan tilted his head a little and glared at him. "Thank you very much, I didn't know that!"

Hands on his hips, Paan shrugged apologetically. "Sorry! But we really need to do something. Why should you suffer for something that was not your fault?"

"I'm not entirely blameless," Bihaan argued and upon seeing that his friend was about to protest, shook his head. "Go, fetch me a drink and a little to eat; I've been hungry ever since Bauji has."

Paan hesitated for a moment, clearly not ready to let the subject drop, but gave in, at last, and nodded. "Alright. But don't brush off this topic!"

Pointing toward the temple behind him, Bihaan said, "Am sure I will be shown a way, eventually."

When his friend was out of view, Bihaan sat up straight, rested his arms on his knees, and let his head fall. He really didn't understand what he was supposed to do. Everything was just so messed up.

At home, barely anyone talked to him, anymore. Even Dadi was disappointed with him- which was far worse than her being angry. Mother seemed to be satisfied and content, though she did make sure to let him know that he had failed to fullfil his promise directly. Besides, she was busy with Dhruv whom he hadn't seen in a while- his brother was like a ghost, you didn't notice him even if he was at home. Bauji...

And he couldn't leave this whole mess behind, it was impossible. He couldn't delete that image of Thapki standing in front of him in her wedding attire, completely drenched, eyes blazing furiously - it was burnt into his mind. Haunted him whether he was awake or asleep.

"...me go! Leave my hand!"

Startled out of his turmoil, Bihaan blinked. What was that? Sounded like a girl's voice, very familiar, and it was very close by. Standing up slowly, he looked right and left before turning around - and gasped in surprise when he felt something collide with him.

Instinctively, he wrapped his arms around the warm body, steadying them both before they could topple down the stairs. Nails were digging painfully into his forearms, and ragged breaths were brushing over his collarbone. Looking over the black head which was resting against his shoulder, he recognized a familiar short, big guy staring at him with wide, shocked eyes.

The guy who had talked about causing problems for Dhruv and Thapki on the day of their rokha.

"Are you okay?" He asked the girl in his arms - who froze, instantly.

As she pushed him away a little too vehemently, a caught a good look of her face. His heart skipped a beat, and dread pooled into the pit of his stomach. Thapki.

Thapki seemed equally stunned to see him here. "Y-you!"

"Wow, what a surprise!" The guy laughed loudly, though his voice was quivering slightly, and walked down toward them slowly. Bihaan frowned at him and it took him a moment to realize that the reason for his forced courage were the four people standing behind him- two women, a girl and a man, probably his family. He was boasting for them but still, couldn't mask his fear completely. "Thapki, I was just inviting you to join us for pooja, now I see why you refused!"

Thapki was stiff, her shoulders tensed and she was wringing her hands, though whether due to nervousness or agitation, Bihaan couldn't tell. "I don't have t-t-time for y-your stu-stupidness."

As she was about to turn away, the guy called out, "But you had time to fall into your ex's brother's arms!" Thapki paused, paling slightly, and Bihaan felt his own insides clench uncomfortably. "I see that your marriage didn't only break because of your pathetic stammering! Openly engaged to one brother and secretly laying in the arms of the other- it's alright. What else could anyone want from such a stammering mess as you than your pretty body?"

Bihaan didn't know what it was- maybe the utter terror and pain clouding Thapki's features, maybe the tears rolling down her cheeks, maybe the way how she lowered her head and covered her face with her hair hiding from the dozens of onlookers and their judgmental gazes - but the next moment, he had grabbed the sorry excuse of a human being by his collar and threw him down the stairs, immediately rushing after him.

He couldn't think straight. His mind was numbed by a thick cloud of raging fury, his vision completely red. He heard the guy pleading him to stop, felt hands trying to pry him off of him, but his limbs were moving on their own accord- hitting again and again and again. It didn't feel enough.

"Bihaan!"

And just like that, the spell was broken.

He blinked. The disgusting guy was barely conscious, breathing hard and hiding his bloodied face in his palms. His parents, as Bihaan assumed, were at his side in an instant. Stepping back from them, Bihaan first, stared at the hand resting on his right arm, then at Thapki who was glaring at him heatedly.

"A-a-are you out of your m-mi-mind? Why did y-y-you hit Di-Diwakar this much?!"

"Why?" He repeated, disbelievingly. "Didn't you hear what nonsense he said about you?!"

"Why do you even c-c-ca-care?"

Bihaan opened his mouth, not knowing what to say, and closed it again, turning half-away from her accusing eyes.

"We will file a complaint against you!" The woman he thought was Diwakar's mother shouted hysterically. "Look how much my poor baby is bleeding!"

Bihaan scoffed. "Go ahead, if you'd like to. Next time, I'll just make sure none of you will be able to even think about a complaint."

"W-we are not afraid!" The woman said unconvincingly and exchanged a quick, nervous glance with her husband. "We have enough witnesses here to get you behind bars!"

Unfortunately, that was true. And if he was honest, should he land in jail for this, he was damn sure Bauji wouldn't bail him out. Seeing the mood his father was in, he would probably make sure that Bihaan was longer locked up than necessary.

"The only thing we witnessed was your son misbehaving with a girl!" Shouted someone from the gathered crowd, surprising Bihaan - and said surprise rose only when slowly, more and more people agreed to that statement.

"Maa," Diwakar groaned. "Let's leave!"

Bihaan's attention was averted from them when he noticed Thapki turning around and starting to walk away, quickly. Hastily, he followed her. "Wait! Where are you going?"

Thapki frowned at him. "A-a-aw-away from you. Stop fol-fo-following me! A-and don't expect gra-grati-gratitude for what you ju-just did!"

"I-" He stopped, eying her intently. There was a single rose petal stuck between her strands. A little unsure, he indicated to his own head and nodded at her. "There. Uh, in your hair."

Confused, Thapki touched her head until she could grab the petal, and she took it out, letting it fall down.

"And I don't expect a Thank you," he explained awkwardly. "I just..." Am being a complete fool .

She hesitated for a moment, chewing on her lower lip, her anger diminishing a little it seemed, before pointing her own hand toward him. "You are bl-ble-bleeding."

Caught off guard, Bihaan looked at his right knuckles- true enough, they were covered in blood, not all of it his own. But judging from the pain that was pulsating through his hand and which he hadn't noticed earlier, some of it was really his own. "Oh, I didn't..." he trailed off, realizing that Thapki had taken advantage of his distraction and had left. Dammit.

"Bihaan bhai? What happened to your hand?"

He shook his head at Paan and eyed the food his friend was carrying with distaste. "I don't feel hungry anymore." Actually, he was sure that he would throw up anything he would eat, right now.

Paan furrowed his brows, clearly not understanding. "But you-"

Not waiting for him to complete this sentence, Bihaan walked away, all the while glancing around in hopes of catching a glimpse of Thapki. Maybe... him meeting her here at the temple was a sign. Maybe he should try to earn her forgiveness. Maybe...

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