Angrez chale gaye ... Tameez chod gaye...

Sahi kehti thi wo Ayesha... ki shah mansion mein koi rok tok nahin, kahi bhi kabhi bhi aane jaane ki... waise bhi toh sab khuli gaay ki tarah ghoomte rehte hai idhar udhar...

Aur is gaay bhains ke tabele mein nayi entry maari hai Sr Mishra ji.. yahin... pichle hafte... yaad nahin hai kya ? Waise bhi bhoolne waali baat thodi na hai .. saala budhaaoo... bhoolne deta bhi nahin... naak me dam kar diya hai... sab ke... budhaape mein jawaani ka nasha jo chada hai buddhe ko....

Na apne bete ko honeymoon par bhejta hai taaki apni biwi ke saath do bol bolle aur na unhe chain se sone dete hain...

Kabr mein ek taang atki hai, aur saans lene ko , dawai ka mohtaaj hai, phir bhi akad nahin gayi... tevar toh dekho inke... dawai leni hai , par dawai ka ata pata nahin, aur wo bhi yaad aaya,... jab saara jahaan so gaya ho!

Arre uncle , aapko dawai dhoondhne ke liye, wo khaane ka table hi mila tha... apne room mein dekh lete...extra toh pade rehte wahaan, aapki wo pyaar ipyaari edi bahu inthna toh karti hogi...... khaali peeli shaan patti karte rehte hai , raat ko... dawai ka bahaana banaake... aapko waise bhi koi dekhna nahin chaahta.. kyon baar baar saamne aate ho uncle... kone mein baite ke ghaas phoos chabao aur geetha pado na?!

Aur agar utkar , dawai dhoondne nikle aur us shaani ayesha ne bola ki aapki bahu ke paas hai.. tho gaay ki tarah awaaz karte karte chale jaate... yeh , dabe paon jaane ki kya nautanki hai...
Aur waise bhi aapki wo teen bar waali khaasi... arre wo aapko khud neend se jaganahin paati , wo kya aapki bahu aur bete ko jagaa paati... kya akal paayi hai aapne bhi!
Waise bhi aapki bahu ki neend haraam hogayi aapke ede bete ke saath reh ke , isiliye... usko aapki wo high frequency waali khaasi bhi sunai di! Shukr karo...

Aur aspataal se bhaagne ke chakkar mein, apni tameez wahi chod aaye , ya shah saab ke talve chaat the chaat the.... tameez bhi bech di ?
Arre uncle , bete ke kamre mein jaa rahe hai... kam se kam bete ka naam toh pukaar dete... yaa apni bahu ki hi sahi! Ye billi ki tarah kya chale gaye andar ... aur jaane ke baad... sorry bola ...

Aapke sorry ka kya achaaar banaate wo log...??!

Arre kya uncle... is umr mein kuch aisi waise baat dekh bhi lete ... toh...aapki toh shock ke maare hi death ho jaati.. acchi ya buri shock... tapakthe toh aap hi...ki fark painda?

Waise bhi aapka beta bhi aap hi par gaya... aap hi ki tarah besharam hai... biwi ke saath nautanki kar raha hai , aur saare jahaan ko bataane , kamre ka darwaaza bhi khula choda hai! Waah! Waise bhi bahu bhi kya kamaal ki mili, bilkul apne ede pati pe gayi hai... sach poocho edi , usi ke nakshe kadam pe chal rahi hai... mental naari...

Arre emotions ki vaat waise bhi lagaa chuke ho, akal ko baksha nahin, ab tameez ki vaat lagakar chodoge kya ?!

Bhaggu ji, aka;l nahin diya inhe ...toh samjhe ki bewakoof hai, emotions confused waale diye, socha kamzor dil hai, ye tameez bakshene mein bhi aapne kanjoosi dikhaayi Bhaggu... tho ye toh fultooo item log hue na... inko sach mein kisi museum me rakhna hai... aur paise bhi lagne chahiye inhe dekhne ke liye ... ede kahike!

Ek taraf ye buddhe Mishra hai, jo excuse me bolna chod, sab karne ke baad , sorry zaroor bolte hai... tho doosri taraf inka beta hai... eda... jahaan bolna hai I love you, bolta hai thank you, aur jab bolna hai sorry, toh kalti maar leta hai in a hurry....yaa even better, bolta hai, mujhe divorce dedo abhi ?!

Arre jab biwi tere ede on the run baap ko ghar laayi toh kya wo tere ko chai ki chammach de rahi thi jo usko thanks bola re ede ?? Aise time mein apna mooh band rakh re paagal aadmi , teri aankhaan better baat karti hai re...
Aur jab tere ko sorry bolna tha, apne edepan ke liye, jab tu uske yaar ke saath shaan patti kar raha aur apne goonge pyaar ki duhai de raha tha..., toh tu ulta gadha , maangta hai usse divorce, wo bhi tabhi ?!

Ye tere ko thank you bolne ki bimaari kaise lagi re ede ? Lagta hai , high society logon ki bimari tujhe lagai hai , angrezi mein aati hai , saala ek hi word, toh lagao uski vaat ... baat baat par bolo thank you aur sorry!

Arre , main toh bhool gayi... abe shaane , tere ko teri biwi se pyaar hai ke uske yaar se re ??? Biwi ke khayaal se zyaada , uske yaar ke khayaal tere dimaag mein ghoom rahe hai...

Arre tu uske yaar ka naam aise japta hai re, ki itni baar agar bhaggu ji ka naam japega, toh tere ko mukti mil jayegi re ede!

Saans lo , saans chodo, mooh se ek hi baat... bas usich ka naam... Tere toh har baat uske naam se shuru aur uspar hi khatam , bechaari biwi ke importance ki vaat toh kab ki laga di re tune ... arre wo jungle mein mangal waali raat se! Tere kuch nahin ho sakta re! Bobby aunty , bhi yahin kehendi hai! "There is no hope Puttar, in his case... no hope.."

Aur is ede ki edi biwi... goongi saavitri...jo bhi karti hai sab ek dum silence ... total chuppi.. sorry aur thank you bhi silently bolti hai re! Haila... Arre edi, aise chup chap bolegi na , toh kisi sunai nahin deta amma! ham sab ooncha sunte hai... aur tera pati toh , uncha aur only with dhamaka sunta hai! Kya zamaana , hamein batana pad raha hai tere ko! Uff! Par tu itni bhi edi nahin hai... bas apne pati ko dekh ke teri khopdi chalni band ho jaati hai.. aur chuppi toh jaise tere hoton pe chipki hai full time!

Arre inlogon ke thank you aur sorry ko sunke sunke mere kaano ki vaat lag gayi hai!

Tameez naam ki cheez bhi tameez se istemaal karte hai , aye vaye nahin re .... ede log ...!!!

Sorry ki toh vaat laga rakhi hai ... yahaan par

Izaat ka falooda banao, bolo sorry
Raaton ke neend haraam karo...bolo sorry
Emotions ki vaat lagao.. bolo sorry
Ek raat mein ladki ko preggie banao , bolo sorry
Talli hoke behave karo silly, phir bolo sorry
Peeke talli ho jao aur biwi ko yaad karke rone lago silly , while ex flame behaves like wicked lily and keeps calling Milly hunny... ..phir bolo sorry
Bin badal ki barsaat ki tarah barso apne biwi pe aur phir bolo sorry
Akal naam ki cheez ki toh aisi vaat lagao ki akal ke naam se dare log... aur Phir, phir se,... phir se .... edon...phir se bolo sorry...

Hamaari expectations ki toh har roz vaat lag rahi hai... koi hame bhi toh bolo re sorry?! Kameenon!

Dekh dekh ke, aankhon ki
Sun sun ke , kaano ki
Aur logic dhoondhte dhoondte... akal ki haamaari vaat lag gayi hai...
Koi hamein bhi bolo re sorry....

Angrez logon ne jaate jaate sorry ke saath tameez bhi chodi thi kamenoon... Uski tho laaj rakhlo re!

Maulaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!! ... kuch karo yaar aap! Unnka nahin tho kam se kam hamaara!

-Sareeta

I really can't comment..! i'm laughing to hard and its making my tummy hurt..!! 🤣

OMG Sareeta, thank you so much dear for the post 🤣 i am laughing like a fool looking at the computer.. will comment later after iftaar... I need to read this again.. 😆

sareeta you did it again 😆 ....
weldone hun 👏 👏 👏 ... do tell them 😡 😡 ...

OMG Sareeta,I fell off my chair laughing. 🤣 🤣 🤣 .That was absolutely mind blowing,fanastic,fabulous,excellent.....I don't know what else to say.I wonder how you manage to write so beautifully.You surely have a flair with words Sareeta.I am so tensed at work today,and I had to take a break,so came on to IF and then read your post.This took all the tensions off my mind.I feel so refreshed now.You have described everything about every character so perfectly that I don't have anything to add to it.
Nicely done Sareeta. 👏 👏 👏 .And I am still not able to control my laughter.

@critically-sane: Same here,my tummy is hurting like anything.

Madhavi.

wht a post yaar.. i was upset n u made me laugh through this! 😆

🤣
you are tooooooooo good.

omg!!! sareeta dear tussi toh great ho mahan ho kya word to word likkha hai hum toh appppki baton pad hass hass keh thak gae lekin abbi bi hasssi rukne ka naaam nahin leh rahi... 🤣 i really like the way u use this word "edda" and "eddi" 🤣 lekin sach kaha agreee wid u i tooo hate that khiskela buddha aise hi khalli mein time waste karela hai... 😆 gr8 post dear..hum toh appke posts keh fan hai....tooo goood dear.. 👏

God Sareeta, how do u come up with these things?! I laughed so hard I had tears in my eyes!

BTW, who's Bobby aunty???

wonderful, wonderful, wonderful. 👏 👏 👏
thank you for making me laugh.