My name is Dexter. Dexter Morgan. Part - I

My first touch at first person narrative'. Dexter fanfic; more like a compilation of Dexter's best narration from the show. This chapter can't compare with the show because it lacks his deep and intoxicating voice, the dark narration, the ineffable theme music to accompany but I've tried hard to reconstruct it all, so yeah give it a shot and I won't be continuing it.

Tonight's the night.

As I stroll through the beach road I see a lot of people, different kind. I see a couple on the roadside doing that thing they all do, kissing - it's one of those mating rituals I don't understand. I wish they'd all stop doing that.

I like living in Miami, I like the beach and you get to eat a lot of Pork Sandwiches. I love pork sandwiches.

But I'm hungry for something else. I really need to kill someone.

Of all the places in the world why did I choose Miami? It's where the crime solving rate is low, it's where I can do what I need to do without getting caught.

Now I'm walking, walking towards the garden where there are school kids dressed up nicely, chamber choir as they call it. There he is, Frank Richards. Head Master of HoneyTwain primary school. I need to kill him.

Two minutes is all it took for me to rise up from behind and throw a nylon wire around his throat and make him suffer. I could hear him gasping for air, my dark passenger's satisfaction was palpable. I loosen the wire just enough for him to be able to talk and not scream.

Wha. What do you want!'

I need you to be quiet.'

Okay. Okay. Just don't do...' I tighten the string again.

You see. Right now, it is just you and me and I am in control here. So drive. Quietly.'

Frank drove. I observed.

Turn here.'

Stop.'

Frank screams and tries to run.

Frank you stupid f**k.'

I don't flinch, I don't mess things up that's why I have been able to do this all these years without having the Miami's finest behind my back. I break open myself and put the real me, the dark passenger in control and I have my hands around his neck now. I am not forgiving, I have no feelings, I don't understand feelings. I press my hand around Frank's throat, pressing uncomfortably on his windpipe until he sputters. His eyes popping out. Shut the f**k up Frank' I yell. As I release the grip the sound of his wheezing breath fills the void around. I had taken him to the cemetery, the place where he brought all the girls.

I drag him inside, deep inside the woods into a small cabin I had arranged, I like to be clean and meticulous. It takes a lot of planning and skills to do this, trust me. I push him against the wall.

Please.' He sobs.

Cry. Did one of those little girls cry?' I stare into his eyes and I see my own turmoil staring back at me but I don't touch kids. I have standards and I follow them.

Please let me go. You can have anything.'

Stop trying to convince me, that never helped anybody. Look around, Look at what you have done.'

I handle my victims differently, I show them what they have been up to. They deserve to know the reason why I chose them. I put up pictures of the small girls around the cabin for him to see how he has ruined them and their families as well. Families, another human ritual I don't understand.

I put him on the flat steel bed, I strip him off completely and tie him to the bed with tight plastic sheets. Plastic and duct tape are my accomplices. Plastic is helpful and easily disposable. I take a surgical knife and make a small straight cut on his cheek, I collect all my victims' blood and place it in blood spot glass slide cards. My own trophy set. I open the closet and take a compact chain saw which is sharp enough to cut through bones. I stand over him, exhaling, with my eyes closed I dig into his head. The first part I go for is usually the head. I like the sound of the brain spatter. The next ninety minutes were so rewarding.

Don't worry Frank. You'd be packed neatly into plastic bags and you'll be dropped in the bay. It'll be a much quieter place. Trust me.' I spoke to his corpse. I feel much better now, I feel satisfied.

I am Dexter Morgan. I live by the beach in a nice apartment. I don't know what made me the way I am, but it sure did leave a huge void inside which I usually fill with these killings. My father found this about me when I was young, he didn't tell my mother though. My father did a wonderful job raising me. Anyway, he's dead now.

No I didn't kill him, really.

Getting my boat deep into the water, I like to go into the water sometimes just so I can pretend to be human, so people could see me behaving like any other normal person would. Oh there they are. My wonderful neighbors are swimming in the Marina. Look at them, they can laugh and play. It comes so easily for them. Even though I'm not one of them, even though most of the times I am just another monster I have to pretend. I have to put up a faade, yes.

Hola Amigo'

Hey Dex, how you've been'

This elegant formula has worked wonders through the years of happy inhumanity. In between fake playdates I try to maintain my average human lifestyle, I am never late to work. I make the right kind of jokes. I work for Miami Metro, I am a forensics expert. Blood, is my expertise. I am neat, perfect with no spots of suspicion and I have well balanced social value.

People have caught me staring into empty space sometimes, Sergeant Doakes in the department always knew that there was something off about me and he wasn't modest about that feeling. I know I have to take care of him some day. If he knows the truth about me he definitely won't be able to handle it. The reality is that there is no one in this world left alive who can handle my truth. Sometimes I wonder what it would be like for everything inside me that is denied and unknown to be revealed. But I'll never know. I live my life in hiding, I have lived all my life in hiding and I will continue. My whole survival depends on it.

This code I have, the set of rules, it was my father, Harry's idea. He'd hate to see me deviate from the code but I have set a new path to myself which is a lot like the old one, only mine. To stay on this path I need to work harder, explore new human rituals and evolve. Am I evil? Am I human? I am done asking those questions because I don't have any answers. Does anyone?

*to be continued*