FF: Forever and Always........THREAD 3 updated pt 58/pg 130 - Page 50

Part 51

Rano was waiting for her children for breakfast. It had been years and today she had made paranthas again. Alu parantha for Geet and Paneer Parantha for Tej with her homemade anchaar and Dahi. As both Tej and Geet came down Rano passed a smile and wished them both Good morning.

She had expected a return wish from both but Geet stared blankly at the table and finally sat down. Rano couldn't help herself and finally asked,

Rano:" Geetu, beta what's wrong?"

Geet looked up and tried brightening up her features as she spoke," I was reminded of someone momma..."

Tej looked concerned as he asked," Armaan??"

Geet:" No Veerji. Strangely I was thinking about Maan. You know Veerji the first time I met him in Mumbai, we had been to chaupati...You should have seen his expression looking at the oily food. You know that man hates oily food...Oh God he can be a real child sometimes..."

Tej smiled. Though Geet had never really spoken of anything regarding Maan but he had seen her had miss him terribly. But today for the first time she spoke his name aloud.

Rano:" Who is this Maan? I can see that someone is blushing..."

Geet was silent. Who is Maan? What would she answer? Tej kept quiet wanting Geet to answer the question. Softly she said the words her heart had long ago accepted.

Geet:" I don't know who he is momma. He is the man who had held me when I had cried, had laughed with me when I had smiled and had been there for me when I didn't have words to express my feelings. Love is such a small word compared to what he is for me. "

Tej:" Then why aren't you contacting him Geetu?"

Geet:" Hmm?"

Tej:" It has been six months already. I had promised myself I won't interfere but this is getting ridiculous. You both are miserable without each other. So why don't you go back to him? Talk it out with him..."

Geet:" I will. I can't stay away from him anymore but before that I need to do one more thing before that..."

The atmosphere got thick with emotions and Tej sighed. Unlike Geet he had always had the loving care of his mother and even his step father. Her mother didn't have any more children even if she had married again. So unlike Geetu he had a lot easier life... But yes, it was difficult to accept a new person suddenly for the role of father.

Geet looked straight into her mother's eyes and asked softly, " Why Momma? Seeing you today I can tell that you really missed me. So why didn't you ever try to contact me? I have heard Dad's side of story. I want to hear your side too."

Rano kept quiet as if trying to arrange her thoughts. It seems like another lifetime ago that she had been married to Mohinder.

Rano started recounting her own side of story.

" I don't know what Mohinder had said but I will try to tell you everything. I had what you can call a typical arrange marriage. I had never seen Mohinder more than three or four times before marriage. Once we got married slowly we learned to accept each other. Mohinder was a good man, a caring husband and a doting father. After Tej was born we had a peaceful life. But then...I had a miscarriage. That was the hardest time of my life. I had expected Mohinder to be there for me but unfortunately he wasn't. I guess that really was the start of the cracks in our relationships. I did get pregnant with you Geetu and things started getting better for some time. But some cracks are permanent. We had some happy times as a family but somewhere down the line I and Mohinder had stopped being husband and wife long before. That was round the time I met Sekhar. He was everything Mohinder was not. We became good friends but never had the thought crossed me that I should leave Mohinder. However Mohinder soon confessed about his love for Neeta. Strangely I felt relieved. Maybe I hadn't expressed but I was getting suffocated with my relations. Our divorce was mutual and all I had demanded was Teji's education fees. I missed you Geetu. But both Mohinder and I had thought it would be best if we gave you some time to cope with the situations. You took it hard and it was expected of you. However, I couldn't meet you that time as we thought you needed this time apart. I did come to your hostel but for some strange reason could never really meet you. I watched you from afar. You remember Tej used to visit you right? I had been with him every single time but somewhere never got the courage to face you. Maybe I knew I had been a bad mother to you. We did that till you were in seventh standard. I had remarried by then, with Shekhar. But suddenly Shekhar was taken ill and was diagnosed with blood cancer. I had to devote my entire time to him. I guess I had neglected both you and Tej for that but you have to understand. I had loved Shekhar. It was a hard time for me. I am not making excuses. In being Shekhar's wife I stopped being mother to you both but I was helpless with my feelings. It was so painful watching your love slowly fade away from existence. Yes I got some time with him, I was mentally prepared and I did say my goodbye. But was it worth it? Watching him in pain was worse than losing him. Once I lost him I couldn't stay at Lucknow anymore. I left to be a teacher here at the shilong convent. Somehow the peacefulness and silence of this place soothed my heart. I am so so sorry Geetu but I was so broken losing Shekhar that I did not have the heart to be a mother to you. I am just terribly sorry I never could be the mother you deserved. "

Geet was silent. Both she and Tej were shedding tears. Geet had a first hand experience of what it feels to lose your love to death. Maybe she wouldn't have been able to forgive her mom few years ago but right now she knew how hard it is. She got up and hugged her mom. As both shed their tears Geet said softly," It's okay momma! I understand. You had lost your love. Everybody needs time off after such a thing. "

Tej came and group hugged both and said," Why didn't you call me back Mom?"

Rano:"You were studying. As selfish as I had been, I couldn't have asked that from you."

They all nodded as the rest of the breakfast was finished in silence. Soon it was time for Tej to leave. Geet decided to stay some days more with Rano wanting to have some mother-daughter moment. She roamed round Shillong and enjoyed the soothing environment. The pine forests, the foggy morning it all reminded her of her morning walk with Maan. Strange but Maan had occupied so much of her entire being that she hardly missed Armaan nowadays.

It was two weeks of her stay in Shillong. Finally she found her peace of mind she had been searching for in her entire life. She had missed Maan. And she intend on meeting Maan before leaving for her studies abroad. They had both had enough sufferings for lifetime.

*****

Maan had never known how hard it would be to fulfill Geet's wishes. These six months were hardest and he dare say it was harder than those three years after Amy left him. He had some project work in shillong. Khurana groups were opening another hotel there and it would me more like a resort... Where the beauty of nature will not be destroyed by some concrete structure, rather it will be blended into nature. So Maan was actually planning on building wooden cottages which would actually go with the serenity of the environment.

He was here for a week now and he had been working non-stop. This project was very near to his heart. For some reason he felt at peace the moment he stepped into Shillong. It was as if he had finally found peace.

It was his last day and he decided to visit the golf course. It was beautiful. The pine trees, the green meadow, the families visiting... He started strolling round when some unknown bond pulling him towards the pine trees. As he reached he sucked his breath in sharply... there was Geet standing. There was another elderly woman who had remarkable similarities with his Geet. Geet was smiling. The scene soothed his heart. Geet was smiling and her smile was reaching her eyes like never before. It seemed like she had let go of all her burdens.

He watched her from behind one tree...he was drinking her beauty. It was like a perched man was finally allowed some water.

Geet stiffened a bit and suddenly looked in all directions as if she could feel him watching her. He smiled inwardly as he saw Geet being restless as if she knew that he was there. Just like that all his wounds were healed as he realized maybe what Tej, Dev and Naina had been telling him was true. Geet did love him enough to forgive him.

He whispered to himself softly," Please Geet...just for once listen to me..."

Khamoshiyan aawaaz hain
Tum sun'ne to aao kabhi
Chhukar tumhe khill jaayengi
Ghar inko bulaao kabhi
Beqarar hain baat karne ko
Kehne do inko zaraa..

Khamoshiyan.. teri meri khamoshiyan
Khamoshiyan.. lipti hui khamoshiyan

Maan looked at Geet. Geet was no longer smiling. She had left the lady sitting and was walking around as if searching for Maan among the trees. This strangely gave Maan peace. Geet not only did love him but also could feel him even when she didn't know about his presence.

Kya uss gali mein kabhi tera jaana hua
Jahaan se zamaane ko guzre zamaana hua
Mera samay toh wahin pe hai thehra hua
Bataaun tumhe kya mere sath kya kya hua

Khamoshiyan ek saaz hai
Tum dhun koi laao zaraa
Khamoshiyan alfaaz hain
Kabhi aa gunguna le zara
Beqarar hain baat karne ko
Kehne do inko zaraa.. haa..

Khamoshiyan.. teri meri khamoshiyan
Khamoshiyan.. lipti hui khamoshiyan

Maan knew he could have gone and meet Geet but somehow the promise he gave to Geet stopped him. It was weird but he was carrying something in his bag, something he intended on giving to Geet. Opening his bag he brought out the brown packet. Then he tore a page from his note pad and scribbled something. He looked round to find Geet walking far away. He took the opportunity and went near the elderly lady and cleared his throat.

Maan:" Excuse me Ma'am!"

Rano:" Yes?"

Maan:" I know it might sound weird but can you give this to Geet, it is very important."

Rano watched the young man as he forwarded her the envelope. Somewhere she guessed who this young man can be but before she could ask anything he walked away. Maan however lingered around playing hide and seek with Geet as she came back. Once the elderly lady gave the packet to Geet however he left. He had promised Geet and he would keep his promise intact.

Nadiya ka paani bhi khamosh behta yahaan
Khili chandani mein chhipi lakh khamoshiyan
Baarish ki boondon ki hoti kahaan hai zubaan
Sulagte dilon mein hai khamosh uthta dhuaan

Khamoshiyan aakaash hai
Tum udne toh aao zara
Khamoshiyan ehsaas hai
Tumhe mehsoos hoti hai kya
Beqarar hain baat karne ko
Kehne do inko zara.. haa..

Khamoshiyan.. teri meri khamoshiyan
Khamoshiyan.. lipti hui khamoshiyan

******

Geet and Rano had come to visit the golf course. Geet would be leaving for Delhi next day so it was their little picnic cum farewell. Rano and Geet had grown closer to each other in these few days. Somewhere forgiving Rano had been so much easier for Geet and in a way she could relate to her mother. Strangely the more days passed her urge to meet Maan grew more and more to the point that spending even one day away was a punishment.

They were simply sitting near to the pine trees, a place comparatively lonely when suddenly she felt like she was being watched. It wasn't giving her the unwanted feeling of a stalker but the one of a familiar security... She felt the presence of her Maan... Looking around she could not find anyone. She got up ignoring Rano's querries and started searching. After months she felt like her heart was truly beating and she was truly alive.

However no matter how much she searched she could not find Maan anywhere near. Dejectedly she was walking back when Rano forwarded her a brown packet and a letter. Her hands shook in anticipation as she opened the letter to read the flawless scribble she can recognize anywhere in the world.

Dear Geet,

I don't know if I still have the right to call you dear or write this letter but I feel I owe you this much. Before you freak out I wasn't following you. I simply came to shillong for some office purpose and happened to notice you. I could have come and talked with you but I had promised you not to show my face to you unless you want to so I am going to keep that promise. I don't want to explain anything via this letter. I just want to thank you. You had given me something which only you could realize how precious it was. You had shared your Armaan with me and I can't thank you enough for those memories. I always thought that I should return the gesture by sharing my Amy with you. Previously I was afraid. But today again with mere coincidence I was carrying Amy's diary with me in the bag. Maybe somewhere it was destiny that I should get a chance to pass it on to you. This diary contains Amy's version of your story, my story... I am sure you would love to have it... It is my way of sharing Amy with you. Take care, Geet.

Forever and always,

Yours Maan

Geet had tears in her eyes while reading the letter but was shocked with the end signature before realizing that she had given her diary to Maan... Maybe Maan had read her favorite signature and had written in a similar manner.

Rano wiped Geet's eyes and asked," I am guessing that young man must be your Maan?"

Geet could only nod with the amount of emotions chocking her down.

Rano:" I think Tej is right. That guy deserves a chance to tell his side of story. You never know..."

Geet shook her head. If only they knew what was in her heart! The mother daughter duo left for home as Geet prepared herself for another sleepless night... She was curious about what Armaan might have written about her in the diary. It is indeed going to be a long night.