A close bond between parents is crucial for them to take care of their child; but it's equally important for the child to believe that the relationship between parents is strong and solid.
When parents fight in front of their kids, their relationship appears not only fragile but, it can have long-lasting effects on little buds' sense of security and can also hamper their development. Some of the aftermaths are as follows: -
1. Anxiety and Fear: - When children see their parents fighting, going out of control, a sense of fear engulfs them and they stand on shaky grounds. Doubts start cropping up in their minds regarding their parents' capabilities to protect and care for them. When they become vulnerable, the world seems less- safe to them and they annihilate themselves. This leads to developmental problems like having low self-esteem, anxiousness, depression etc. When parents fight, they drift away their attention from the child, which could deprive him of much needed care during crucial times. Your child might hesitate to approach you or your spouse, even during those times when they need you the most.
2. Guilt and Shame: - Many a times children don't understand the reasons for their parents' verbal shouting and their innocence tends to believe the fights are due to them. For example, if the child failed to do some work or misbehaved and later on you picked up a quarrel with your partner, they might put the blame on themselves for the fight. But their heart doesn't understand it and theirparents' contention is quite a burden for any child's shoulders to carry, and often leads to guilt, shame, self-hatred and sometimes it even leads to opting drastic steps.Self-respect is hampered due to all of this, because they make up the conjecture that it's their entire fault.
3. Emotional Problems: - Children shape their behaviour by observing their parents, by watching how they cope up with the plights and matters of conflicts. Your child will either learn how to handle issues by throwing tantrums, fighting or arguing or they may become so disturbed by seeing your fights, they may arrive at a conclusion that emotions are baseless, which lead to explosive outbursts and the fear of being hurt by loved ones. The result is repressed feelings and withdrawing themselves, reluctant to socially interact with others.
4. Trust Issues: - Parents who exchange blows, signals to their children that relationship and intimacy will bring pain and turmoil. Although they see their parents loving each other; such explosive situations often leads to upset the child, with either one of the partner shedding tears. As a result your child might develop trust issues and avoid getting into relationship to protect themselves from getting hurt. They'll steer away from close relationships because they will form profound belief that relationships will inevitably lead to constant brawls.
