She hated him at his very first sight. Despite of all her hatred he managed to intrude in her dreams. She resented herself for dreaming about him in her subconscious mind. When he pulled her with all his strength and emasculated her, she tried with every cell in her being to push him away. She exonerated her senses from his smell which always confused her. She was not sure if she is sane. Her body and mind wanted different things. But she was strong enough to overcome her body and to flush the monster out of her system. She cursed herself for being so vulnerable. She desired not to stand in the same place as he did. His presence burned her. When he chose her to perform alongside with him she thought of all possibilities for an escape route. She choked and almost thrown up every time she thought about him out of the fear. She wanted to bury herself beneath the ground and die a wrathful death than be touched by him. She felt his eyes on her even though she couldn't see him. That is one hell of a feeling she would numb herself as if locked in ice. Nobody can be that cruel she would think. How can someone like him have girlfriend and be happy while making others lives miserable she would wonder. When she punched him for throwing away her appa's pen the blood oozed out of his mouth made her happy. She wanted to get out of SPACE and if possible out of Mumbai.
She yearned for his touch. Once he kissed her neck she wanted more. She wondered what it would like to be locked in his arms and forget the world. She do not want to think away from him. If she wanted, she could have left him answerable to his friends while walking away from his house as boldly as she came in. It felt like an era that she never wanted to hurt him. She wanted to stay. She memorized his smell which already inundated her blood with as much as she can. She allowed him to touch her, kiss her. He can do more than that to her. She would never complain. She would happily give in. She wanted to be his shadow. Follow him wherever he goes. Spend most of her time with him playing games. When she looked up to him it was his eyes that managed to screw her up. She would want him desire him all her life. She can see him and remain starving. The fact that he has a girlfriend tortured her. She died of envy. When he conveyed that they broke up all she wanted to do was hug him and kiss him insanely. She allowed herself to be covered and explored by him. When he danced with her she felt like being the only girl for him. When he had eyes only for her she was the most beautiful person ever born on earth. Holding his hands is her secret fantasy. Though she acted like she don't care, every time he moved away from her she wanted to hold on his fingers and asked him to stay with her eyes. She wanted to live for him. She loved him more than anybody in the world. When he cared for her she wanted to coil herself around him and disappear within him. She never actually believed that Manik felt the same way about her too. He is too handsome and smart for her, she would think. She wanted to be the stars for him as she would light his world when darkness surrounds him, Tell him stories as he lie down on her lap, Sweep his hair while he sleeps on her shoulder. She could cheat death if it means he would smile for her. She found her reason for existence. Her Monster Manik Malhotra. Hers and hers alone.
Hoping to write how every character in SPACE undergone a drastic change form their past to present. Starting with Nandini. Tel me how it is..😊
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Anupamaa
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