Don't get too close.....

by Imagine Dragons.

(As I saw the Aahil Sanam final scene today, this song kept playing in my mind.)

No, don't blame Tanveer. She is so not the culprit here, the offender is Aahil himself or more precisely his selfless love for Sanam. He loves her so much that he just can't afford to love her.

And since the day he fell for Sanam, I knew this was going to happen...(no I m no Sherlock...😆..but most of us knew this was coming). Essentially nothing is standing between Aahil and Sanam...nothing and no one...no Tannu no Mannu...its Aahil himself who is the unsurmountable wall. Aahil is playing a double role. One of a man truly and deeply in love and the other of a man so lost in his inner demons that he wont let this love story go any further.

Aahil is consumed with guilt. His demons in his dark inside refuse to be slain. And it was never only about the abuse he received regularly from his cruel father. The real rot runs deeper. The fires of self condemnation have been eating him up from the insides practically his whole life. It was always about how bad he was. So bad that he went ahead and murdered, killed his own father in cold blood!! Just cause his father used to whip him and beat him, Aahil one fine day lost his cool and killed someone...not just someone...his own father...how unacceptable a fact is that!! How monumental a burden of guilt for a child to carry to his manhood. And to top it all, his mother, his blind step mother at that, had to go to jail to pay for his crimes...just imagine how he must be loathing himself for his existence. How can any human forgive such sins, can ever come out of such deep dark shadows?? How in the world do you repent or ask for forgiveness for such horrific actions...and Aahil grew up hating himself, despising himself, his anger, his weakness, his whole being. He believes with everything in him that he is bad, irrevocably wrong, a totally rotten to the core being whose truth is hidden to the world and that he deserves nothing good, cause he is totally worthless. All he deserves is punishment for his deeds, the retribution he ran from like a weakling, hiding behind his mother's skirts..and so he has punished himself his entire life. And the innate goodness and honesty in him has made sure that he lets everyone know that he is bad..yes he is bad!! No secrets about that, he has gone to great lengths and to great pains to ensure that everyone knows he is the baddest of the lot. And in the process simply told himself..he deserves no better. A good man who believes he is bad!!

So, what happens when such a man falls in love?? He does not believe that he deserves her, he does not believe that she would or for that matter any other person would love him back for what he is. Nothing will convince him of his worth, his goodness. And that is precisely why being a Nawaab and possessing all the assets that any man would die for, be it worldly riches, physical charm or inner beauty, he could never come round to proposing to Sanam. Aahil never had the confidence, the faith in himself. He never felt he was worthy of his lady love. How can anyone love him when he fears himself?

And how clearly Tanveer knows this. All she has to do is to remind him of his ever present insecurities and fears and Aahil is on his knees. Already defeated. HIs biggest fear to the fore...what if I harm her?? What if I make the only person I ever loved and who loves me back...suffer?? Will I, wreck her life too?? Will I break Sanam?? Can I do this to her?? How can a worthless guy like me, a killer at large, take care of someone as precious as Sanam. I am sure to botch this up, sure to make a mess of her life...just like I have done in the past. He is petrified of what he is capable of doing to his own love. Aahil is so scared of himself and his diabolic power to damage beyond repair and redemption, that he would never venture near Sanam now. Not for a while at least...till she figures out what is making her man click...or in this case not click!!

And the irony, when he looks back at his past record he feels his inadequacy not even realizing that he purposely went out of his way to blacken his balance sheet of life.

Tanveer...the burden she laid on the innocent shoulders of a small Aahil ...is so unforgivable. Those shoulders have grown broad and strong with time but lets not forget that the burden of guilt too has grown a thousand fold ...rendering those shoulders unable to cradle a head in love...ever.

Aahil loves Sanam too much to love her...

He looks all rough and edgy, brash and rude, but it's a facade.

His childhood is filled with disappointment, dashed hopes, pain from abuse, crippling loneliness and despair. Then added on to it is a mountain weight of guilt.

Tanveer told him she sacrificed her life so that he could live his. That look he gave her, shows her sacrifice was not a gift at all , but a curse. He didn't live his life, he had to blunt himself from feeling anything with alcohol and girls. Sleep eluded him and nightmares tortured him.

She has made a slave of him.

But then he met Sanam. Who has so much fire in her, she fascinated him. She is unfazed by his gruff manner, his mean tactics just doesn't work around her. She is unimpressed by his bullying, foiling his every move with courage.

Then she clung to him to save her from her fears. He felt truly needed, for once having to be strong for someone else who depended on him. And that vow to be by her side was immaturely transferred into love. And he began feeling possessive of her, jealousy , wanting her to himself. But he had no experience in wooing someone to love him. So he stepped over her toes awkwardly, pushing her away, making her take many steps away despite her unexplainable attraction to him.

Then he started really watching her, her beauty outside and within. He wanted to be her husband. He even shooed Rehan away, claiming her for himself. And like a little boy, started taking tentative steps toward her, keeping one leg back in case he needed to retreat.

Sanam's forwardness and calm bolsters his strength and resolve. Despite his wait and watch policy, she stepped over all imaginary boundaries and touched him, repeatedly. Slowly he came out of his shell and tries to tell her how he feels.

He finds her something amazing. Full of forgiveness and acceptance. He finds all the unforgivable things of his past means nothing to her. Except for that ONE BIG 'secret' . So he gives in to the emotions, enjoying himself in her company.

Finally the bleak loneliness is going away.

But being emotional, he wants to make the moment he confesses his love special. I want today to be the most special day of our lives... And sweetly gives her things he knows would make her happy. Breakfast, clothes, A dhaba plot to apologize for old mistakes, and the last I suspect is a ring, to commemorate their marriage.

But alas, he has more demons to exorcise...

Sorry for the long lament.

your post inspired it😉

Nothing to add.

This will explore Aahil further. It gives space to Aahil's characterization and his demons.

Bring it on.

When he comes back, he only remembers the wrod which said, he is not a good husband, he will hurtt Sanam .. so its all about Sanam not him anywhere.

So he would kill himself to make sanam happy.

Now, its sanam who need to tell that she just need him and nothing else in the world. She is the one who need to make is confident and get him out of that childhood S**T (sorry for using words)

And I am sure she will do it.

I am bit low today, because Sahil is hurt. But am sure Sanam will get Aahil back.

I guess Sanam will not sign those papers.

The demons of the past have awoken again, and this time no amount of releasing balloons will cure Ahil.

Sanam should leave, coz absence will make the heart fonder

You described Aahil soo beautifully. Yes Aahil is scared of his inner demons and Billi used her cards well.

But I don't think she will win this time . Yesterday's promise scene was there because of this. Aahil promised Sanam never to bring his past into their relationship. Sanam is a strong girl. Far too strong then the others Billi have conquered so far. She will get it after Billis antics tomorrow and Aahil will be back once again. We were headed for a cheesy ILU , but now we might get an angsty one. 😃

Billi won't be able to succeed over Sanam as long as she is in her senses .She is going to try to eliminate her completely from Aahils life and that's going to be scary. Aahil without Sanam is something she is aiming for since with Sanam Aahil is far too protected for Billi to manipulate that poor soul. Poor Soul Aahil😆. I never thought I would use these words for him when he was introduced to QH2 for the first time. But well that's the case here.

Billi won't get away soo easily this time.

I was also analyzing Aahil objectively n yes going by all the trauma he has faced ... the guilt he has lived with his whole life.. it wont go that easily... Just in a few days... so yeahhh i agree he is the one who will come between them n he has to fight his own inner demons in order to Come as a survivor, as a winner... so let the journey begin there n then... s excited to see how will it unfold