What Jodha should have said to Jalal (April 7 episode)

After Jalal's outburst, as Jodha decided to tell him everything and walked towards his hojra, only to be thwarted by Maham, here is what I thought she should have told each of them.

To Maham:

"I would not let even my husband's real mother stand between me and him at this moment, leave alone a make-believe one. My heart has never felt much respect for your conduct, but I have always tried to treat you in a respectful manner. That is why, hamari vinti hai, please get out of my way. On the other hand, if you need the indignity of being shoved aside, I will do that."

Next, to Jalal:

"Shehensah, please don't be shocked. You can check yourself, Sun's first rays have not touched Agra yet. I have every right to be here and I have something to tell you. Aapse vinti karte hain, kripaya dhyaan dijiye, varna hum dono ka jivan rote rote beet jayega.

"Shehenshah, aapne kayee baar hamare liye apna prem vyakt kiya hai.

"Yes I know that your heart wants to clarify the gair-mard issue first, and I will get to that, but mine is burning to speak first of what it considers important! So, please bear with me, Shehenshah.

"Aapne kayee baar hamare liye apna prem vyakt kiya hai. Aur hum apne maun ke liye kshama chhahte hain. I could not respond properly, as I was not aware of such feelings within me.

"Till recently.

"Shehenshah, recently the awareness grew within me that the person I used to hate in Amer was not you. It was just some fictional character from the stories I had heard. Hum kitna achambhit hue yeh samajh kar ki aap ko to hum jaante hi nahin the!

"Aur dheere dheere, pata nahin kab aur kaise, hamare hriday mein aapke liye bhavnayen jag gayeen hain. Oh, Kanha, give me strength, why am I playing with words? Shehenshah, humein aapse prem ho gaya hai. Ek baar phir se kehne ki iksha ho rahi hai. Humein aapse prem ho gaya hai.

"Is it not ironic Shehenshah that destiny has chosen these circumstances for us to discover and express our love.

"Ek baat aur Shehenshah---I promise to get to that gair-mard soon!---hum aapke mukh se ek bar aur sunana chaahte hain ki aap humein prem karte hain. Tell it softly like men in stories tell their beloveds, or tell me angrily as you did a little while ago, jo bhi tariqa jo bhi swar aap ko pasand ho usi mein hum se phir se ek bar kahiye ki aap hum se prem karte hain.

[A shell shocked Jalal mumbles the words. Jodha closes her eyes soaking it all, then opens again.]

"Ab to us gair-mard ki baat karni hi hogi. Hamara man to bilkul nahin hai, parantu theek hai, karte hain.

"Shehenshah, have you lost your mind? In all of my life, including when I thought I hated you and thought you to be selfish and cruel, never did I think of you as mentally unsound! Lekin hamare vivah ke pashchat aapne hamein aise do avasar diye hain. First when having spent an entire night next to my unconscious body, you started questioning later whose child I was 'pregnant' with. Second time was tonight.

"Shehenshah, the greatest qasam I can take is not of my parents, brothers, sisters, Amer, Rajvanshi maryada, ancestors, or even Kanha and Ambe ma. The greatest qasam that Amer Kunwari Jodha can take is of her husband. You. I would never have taken it except for the task facing us, to pull us out of this hole, so we can start living our life and our true destiny.

"Therefore, my husband, aap ki qasam, phir se suniye, mere pati ki qasam, aap ki qasam, the moment I walked around agni with you, all other men in the world forever became fathers, brothers and sons to me. Whatever distance might exist between you and me, be it small or large, no other man has, can, or will ever come there. Kadapi nahin, kabhi nahin.

"Shehenshah, you seem uncomfortable. Please don't be. And don't be embarrassed. Although never having been a purush myself, I may not understand why you are so susceptible to such a baseless idea, I do acknowledge your feelings as real. I do so with samman, with prem. With all of my new prem in which even thorns feel like flowers to me. [Looks up.] Kanha, give me strength, this is not the moment to become ethereal as my new prem wants to make me! [Looks at Jalal again.] However, my husband's mind is also not a trash-can. I will simply not allow such thoughts to fester there. Therefore, what I just told you, I will tell again and again, everyday if needed, every hour if you want, any moment you require, till it is needed no more and till you want to hear it no more.

"Oh yes, that man. Shehenshah, he is a relative of mine. He wanted to see me because he was concerned about our welfare, yours and mine. Call it his own folly or Kanha's will that he had to meet me secretly instead of walking through the gates. I can not reveal his identity to you because I gave him my vachan that I will not. I should not have given such a vachan when he asked, that truly was my own bhool, but I was not anticipating such consequences and almost absent-mindedly said yes. If you really want to know his identity, you can ask Motibai, or ask him directly, or take me to him and I will ask him to release me from my vachan.

"But Shehenshah do you really want to spend this night dealing with such non-issues?

"In a few hours, Sun's rays will reach Agra and I will have to leave the fort - for Ambe Ma's mandir. Aap ko itna vichlit aur dukhi dekh kar hum ne unse hum dono ke liye prathana ki thi, aur pratigya bhi ki aap ke chehre par dubara prasannata dekhne ke baad hum unke darshan karne turant ayenge. To ab to humein jana hi hoga. If you want, you can accompany me; somehow we are always better together when we are out of this mahal. Someday as soon as possible we should also go to see Chishti baba. [Smiles.] Maybe he will scold you and tell you not to doubt the saathi you have found.

"Till the morning however, Ambe ma will surely understand and forgive her daughter, but till then I only want to hear about your love and talk about mine. Again and again. Till then, I can not and do not want to think about anything else.

"Hum bahut bol chuke. [Jala looks shell-shocked, crest-fallen and happy all at once. She kisses away his tears and kisses his injured palm.] Ab aap ki bari hai, Shehenshah. Aap kuchh kahiye. Kuchh bhi kahiye. Aur kuchh nahin to sirf 'Jodha Begum' keh dijiye. [He half-succeeds at mumbling something.]

"Ek baat aur. I will be a good wife to you all of your life. But not tonight. For the rest of this night, I want to be a spoiled beloved. Is liye ab hum aap ko nahin rone denge. Ab hum royenge aur aap hamare ashru pochhiye."