@neetha you know the main difference between being a gf, bf than being a married couple. Let me tell you from personal experience. When we were courting each other post engagement( since ours was an arranged marriage) we were playing only one role. Whenever we were together he was my fiance and I was his. The whole family were like made space for us. We could chat with each other over phone, could go out for lunch, dinner etc.. unperturbed.
But when you marry the equation changes. You are no longer a fiance. In every situation your various roles clash. He is a son, brother, son-in-law, brother-in-law , friend, professional etc etc and same with you. You are a daughter, DIL, Sis-in-law, sister, friend, professional etc.. . Along with those many roles your role as a husband or wife comes.
And in every situation based on the situation you have to choose which role should get priority. Many people fail terribly here. Reason is we want to justify our actions to others. This will be beneficial in short term, but long term it fails terribly as tempers will flare as one party will always feel aggrieved. If you just choose action which you can justify to yourself believe me in short term it can flare tempers, but in long term you will survive. Listen to your conscience because only that can give you peace of mind in long run, but listening to it you will have to let go of your ego.