Ashamed of Archu's family - Page 8

Originally posted by: vidyasu1

Sere, my compliments to you on starting an interesting topic. It tempted me to crawl out of the woodworks. cheers.😃😃

Originally posted by: sereaishitedare

Sherma sweety, I am not trying to disregard your opinion as I understand where you're coming from, but I am going to be factual here. I am a psychology student, so please don't take my opinions the wrong way.

The Karanjkar family is trying to be good to Archu, but are suffocating her in the process. Archana has obviously not gotten over the failure of her marriage, and pushing her into a marriage that she is not ready for will not help, it will suppress the grief and be a cause for chronic depression, and a whole host of other mental disorders. When faced with a tragedy, no matter what it is, the loss of a parent, the death of a child, the death of a spouse, the end of a marriage, heck even the death of a pet!, it is crucial to grieve before trying to move on. Think about it, if someone was 14 weeks along in their pregnancy, and had a miscarriage, would they try for another baby right away? Maybe, but if they do that miscarriage will haunt them for the rest of their lives, thinking that they replaced their lost child with another, and will either never be able to love their child or smother them and spoil them so they can't make any productive decisions in life.

Archana already has suicidal/self-harm tendencies that are the screaming for help 'Please get me some help, some therapy'. If Sulochana really loved her daughter and was trying to do whatever she could to keep her daughter safe and happy, she would have gotten her daughter therapy, not shoved her into an unwanted marriage.

As far as marrying a would-be-rapist, Vandu didn't want to marry him, she was blackmailed by Ajit and his mom. I don't condone it, in fact I strongly oppose such decisions, I'm just reminding you of what happened in the show.

Originally posted by: vidyasu1

Sere, my compliments to you on starting an interesting topic. It tempted me to crawl out of the woodworks. cheers.😃😃

Originally posted by: lunza

Yup she definitely has suicidal tendencies .. she has already tried to end her life before .. and yesterday she burned her hand ...
The k's know all this .. they know her state of mind ... while I agree with kools post about sulo being a typical mom taking decisions within the social framework etc.. I feel sulo should just back off for a while ..
Surely sulo and mano would prefer a spinster archana over a dead archana ????
Her family is going to drive her to suicide one of these days...
And who says a woman needs a man to complete her???
Why cant archana just take up a teaching job in primary school, adopt a kid and live with her parents? ... I think she would make a great mom ....
Is that such a bad life to have ???

P.S - seri .. are u a kannadiga??

Originally posted by: nikitagmc

@sere: whoa! another interesting point! Thanks for putting it across in such simple words. Someone had tried to explain to me long back, but I hadn't understood clearly then.

Hmm... then I guess am more interested in psychology not psychiatry. 😆 But then even neurology is highly interesting.😆

anyhow... I'm glad you have read some of my posts.

Do keep posting, its nice to read different POV's and debate on them.

Originally posted by: nikitagmc

@sere: Neurology, psychiatry and psychology can be very related at times. There's a book- 'phantoms in the brain' by an eminent indian scientist that gives some very interesting examples. Some clinical cases were sent to psychologists by the neurologists since the patients were having behavioral problems- some were even classified neurotics and psychotics. Later, research proved that these behavioral problems were actually stemming out of neurological problems- infarct, amputation and so on. Proved to be a very interesting read.

Sure, will keep pestering you now. 😆

Originally posted by: bonnefille

I have always said that archana herself needs to be blamed for her sufferings.

About the grieving period......yes i agree she is 28 and it will give sulochana stress. But sulochana should have dealt the situation patiently. She should have made a step by step attempt. She should have asked archana to emotionally disconnect from manav....instead she was sending sheera for him. she should have asked manav to disconnect himself from archana instead she used his emotional hold on her to go according to her liking.

She has always been doing things according to her own liking then looking at the bigger picture for archana. She has made archana live according to her terms and she still continues to want that.

Originally posted by: vidyasu1

Kool, I think I wisely decided to opt out of commenting. You have every right to hold your views. In fact you have an entire thread where you state your POV very strongly -- and every day. I enjoy your humour and I have never ever disputed your right to say what you want -- even if I did not agree with it or felt aggrieved by it, which I did very often. . So if after days, months perhaps, I do a single post, it is not fair to come back at me saying I am attacking someone else's point of view. That is intolerance. I said I cannot understand how people can drool over a family that cannot see its daughter's distress and immediately followed it up by saying sorry if I offended anyone. It is my POV -- and, if I am not mistaken, it is the the POV of many others who have participated in this thread. And if I think Archu's sisters are giggly, insensitive and selfish, I have reason to believe and say so. I even added a smilie to let you know it is all in god humour. I find Dharmesh loathsome and am angry that Vaishali is oblivious to how terribly worng he is. It is my view that women ought not to blindly support their husbands and should have their own identities. In the case of archana and manav, you have to admit that they never, ever fight for themselves. When they themselves are attacked or humiliated, they take it silently. But they react strongly when the other is attacked and even when an outsider is wronged.. They have a strong sense of justice even if that is dangerously veers on OTT. Which is why in the end they get the maximum votes in SOTD. Because somewhere in all of us there is a strong sense of right and wrong. We want good to win over evil even if we accept the unavoidable reality of the greys. You say you like the grey characters. That is your prerogative. I have been a working woman with a great career living on my own -- in India -- for many many years. I have met more grey than positive characters in the course of my work. I have even admired their guts; perhaps they are more interesting too. Who is not fascinated by a bitch? But even today my eyes light up, and I feel really, really good from the inside when I meet someone who is idealistic and who will not compromise on essential values.There are not many like that but there are a few and they make me feel that they are the people who make the world go around. I suspect I am not alone in feeling this way. In a bizarre, twisted sort of way foolish Arman represent this essential goodness and which is why despite all the idiotic things they do they still have so many people rooting for them.

Kool, I will not post again and this is a promise because every time I do, I get it in the neck. Cheers.