Kunal - am I worthless...

Most common I remember is his ego, preoccupation with being hurt, narcissism and self-pity. Anything he did or did not do, we blamed it on either one of them. While I agree these issues certainly play a role in Kunal's character, but true underlying theme that is core problem is feeling of dejection, inadequacy, no respect for self. In simple words, Kunal doesn't value himself at all.

I have sensed this quite often but after seeing his emotional outburst last Friday and this week so far, I am certain that is THE PROBLEM with Kunal. Bare with me (if you want) as I will incorporate things from day 1. Kunal had been rejected by society, GF and his family. That was reason he had lost zest for life. What he needed was sense of genuine acceptance. Siddhi is the one who provided that, actually only one who provided that. So when she antagonized him9 years ago, he took it way too seriously. Siddhi called him a failure and he accepted that blindly. After leap we saw Kunal again indulging in self-destructive activities. I remember AC1's B'day party, those businessmen were taking dig at him right left and he simply stood there. Sure initially he gave some response, but when it came to real issues, he took it. He reacted only when they said something about SIddhi. Later we saw family taking digs at him, more than they use to. He also took that. Before leap he would avoid them, but after leap he stands there and in a way invites people to do so.

Once he saw Siddhi, some movement came. But till then he was afraid of court-room. Well if Siddhi was at fault, why did he fear court? He was afraid of life, scared of looking in the mirror, cursed the day he was born. Why? Because SIddhi wasn't there. Well but if she was wrong, why are you on path of self-destruction. Just because Siddhi said so (who was wrong), why do you hurt your self? He sure had some acting out during this period, but it didn't last very long. He would struggle to engage with Siddhi at party, thinking he has no right any more. His belief that Siddhi no longer cares for him as he's not good enough. Again if she was wrong, why go to her. Even there Siddhi had more power. Banglore trip, Siddhi confessed and he was on cloud 9. But then Abhay says he proposed and she said yes, he backed off? Where is your ego and hurt? If your ego was really that big, well question her as what the hell is that? But no, he backs off thinking she agreed, I am too late. Why do you take yourself for granted?

Later he decided to leave the town as he couldn't see it. His love is there. Whole rushed clearing of MU takes place and he is again happy. When he went to get her form Diwan mansion, he was more hurt then anything. There he resisted for a while, but as soon as Siddhi said I don't care about you, he took it. Sure some anger outburst but later same drinking, self-destructive behavior. When Siddhi went to get him, he's drunk as hell near forest, walking on road with no sense of direction or sense of self-preservation? Again, if she was wrong, why hurt your self so much? During court case, I read only Siddhi said something nice about him. Everyone else came took dig at him and he just stood there? Where is your ego that would make you act out even if you are wrong? He did not say a word about divorce? Why? If you wanted to win the case, get back to Siddhi for hurting you; that was trump card. You could've used that to humiliate Siddhi and Diwan; but actually you made fool out of yourself, why?

Now just past week and all; he is afraid about Siddhi being around him. He looked so vulnerable when he was drunk in front of Siddhi. He was not sure if she was real or not? He struggles to stay away but then afraid to come close. Why does she has so much power? About taunting her and all, who are you really hurting. He broke the radio, who was hurt more? When Siddhi said I love you, so much pain in his eyes, why? Now yesterday's episode, his dream was too much, but again; who did you hurt? This other guy came to your house, why did you leave? Your ego should urge you to throw him out. But rather you are torturing yourself thinking Siddhi is his wife, you are nothing to her. Even going to sleep, he says "the person I love doesn't care about me." Why would you say that? You took Siddhi's harsh words too seriously but not her acknowledgment of love? If she means nothing to you, why hurt yourself so much? Last time you believed Siddhi still loved Anand and this time Abhay🤢 Why can't she love you? What is wrong with you that she doesn't love you?

Again, Siddhi is only one who truly accepted Kunal. So once she left, he's nothing. Now again she left him with whole Abhay nonsense, so he is constantly on guard. He will accept anything harsh she says as truth. But he can't accept when she is being nice. It's not just about trusting her, but guy doesn't trust himself or think someone does care about him. He accepted whatever Abhay said as it was against him, but not anything for him, why? AC1 always goes on papa I love you, you are the best. Now for so many people, that is enough; but Kunal still continues on path of self-destruction. It is like he doesn't accept anything nice about him or fact someone loves him for being him. No he continues hurting himself and allows others to hurt him.

What we saw last Friday before fire scene, Kunal really believes that. He does think of himself as good for nothing, unable to stand up and like a worm. He really believes he is shameless creature who has no direction what so ever. Anyone who has ego would not say that. Sure there is some self-pity, hurt, agony, internal conflict; but underlying issue is sense of worthlessness. He continues to engage in self-destructive activities, does not seek help or allows someone to help him. If he was simply dependable, well why worry now as family and Siddhi both are there. So just enjoy, but he is hurting himself and has no sense of self-preservation. So really, major issue with him is he doesn't value himself at all. If anyone, especially Siddhi says something negative about him, he will accept that but not anything good.

This topic is not just one of my usual analysis of the character. Rather this is more of case conceptualization for Kunal. His ego, hurt, conflict, self-pity are mere manifestation on surface. Real issue is he needs to values himself that yes he is an individual, simple as that. For him to come out of this state of mind that is deeper than when show started out, it will take long time. Again his family or kids can not do it. We know and even Kunal accepts, Siddhi has that power. But it will take some time as he is very guarded about his true feelings. He will show attitude, hurt, anger, denial to hide reality of sense of worthlessness.

Well it's long but conceptualization of case usually is long.

Thanks😊

Did one case conceptualization this morning so I was in mood to do on Kunal.

We can see it yet his near and dears ones can't ..strange? . Instead their actions drown him deeper into his insecurity instead of helping him fight it/emerge out of it .

Yes, people around him go by his ego or anger.

But inside he is very vulnerable person who has no faith in himself. He is simply putting up with life due to few loved ones. But constant drinking, no sense of self-preservation, engaging in fights for money; these behaviors suggest great void inside him. He doesn't value himself really and could care less what happens.

Yes his brother use to say that, but after being portrayed as prodigal son of the family.😕

Even in the very first episode, he was fighting with police. Anyone who has slightest sense of self-preservation would not do that. That was almost suicidal, yet Kunal did it. He does not value himself, thus self-destructive activities.

If Kunal continues to torture himself this way with thoughts that Siddhi doesn't love him, hurting himself won't be enough. Soon enough he will get a mental breakdown. It will be worse than temple scene of "Kunal Chopra is dead" or last Friday scene. He needs to let reality come out and stop being defensive. if not, well then be ready to lose it big time...

his passion, obsession, hobby , favourite pastimes etc etc is self pitying ..now it has become his habit or second nature to pity himself...

i am really tired of waiting to see Kunal manning up and taking control ..he is so much obsessed with himself that he only sees his pain , cares only for his broken heart..

i mean Sidhi rotted in jail for 9 years for a crime she did not commit and even after knowing truth for once he did not think how painful these 9 years would have been for her ...he at least had AC and his family ..what about Sidhi ..has he ever given a thought how difficult it would have been for her in jail..

last night was the limit..i mean agree it is not easy for him to trust Sidhi ans shouldn't trust her or accept her after what she has dome from his POV, in fact i really appreciated for what ever reason , he atleast heard what she was saying ..but saying that after 6 months i will eave your wife at your home to chakaram was too much .. at least had he said ..6 months later i will divorce her and then it is up to both of you to decide ..i would have given benefit of doubt to him but no he was so cheap last night ...

where is the Kunal who was so possessive about Sidhi, who treated her as his own, as his property, ..even when they were hating each other .or weren't even friends..still he exercised rights on her ..but now ..

even if Sidhi tries her best to woo him back ..he would still be pitying himself for some reason or other ...i guess Even Sidhi wont be able to help him ..actually no one can because he doesn't want to ...and unless you want and you try ..nothing and no one can help

so ans is yes ...he is worthless, brain less,clueless..etc