Take my breath away: ShiVi FF - Page 59

I also want to ask - because I am a curious kitty - what did MY gif of 365 Days have to do with this chapter? 🤔

Thank you, Prats for that extremely detailed and thoughtful feedback. I think although I felt vaguely dissatisfied and nervous about posting this one, I also knew deep down that it was among my better pieces, simply because of the amount of effort it took from me. Even now, I feel drained to an extent that I think I cannot write another word, that I'm incapable of stringing two thoughts together in a sentence. That, in itself, tells me that this update deserved more credit than I was giving it, even if I do say so myself.

The thing about lemons I think came from the sheer amount of historical romances I read. The FLs in them smell a lot like lemons and the MLs smell like soap 😆, and perhaps indirectly, and unconsciously that idea was internalized and made its way here. I see how it may seem incongruous in a contemporary romance.

About Raavi's scene being in one paragraph, I get your point. I too like reading that's broken down into smaller paragraphs - that just makes it easier to read and proof-read. But I confess, in this instance, I could not find a justifiable break-point for it, because the entire paragraph was flowing like one seamless thought. Or perhaps that's just me. That said, most of my writing is broken down. I do not like reading long paragraphs myself, so I hear you about this.

Again, thank you for thoughtfully bringing up the sections that you liked the most. I appreciate the thoughtfulness the goes into each and every comment and observation and be assured, that I do not take your feedback lightly. It means a lot to me that you would take the time to do this, when very few would.

I will try exploring other platforms like Wattpad simply because, like you say, I do not want to be confined by the rules here. Again, I'm glad you think I've grown out of that initial hesitancy (which was mainly because of posting on this platform), and have, so to speak, come into my own.

Thanks again for your encouragement! It truly means the world and I shall treasure it always! 🤗

Originally posted by: BlackWitch

I also want to ask - because I am a curious kitty - what did MY gif of 365 Days have to do with this chapter? 🤔

Not this chapter, but perhaps the next one. It just gave me an idea, and it sort of ties in with Raavi's bucket list too.

Wow, I am already excited about this! I am so glad you have embraced ShiVi like this. They are really bringing out the best in your writing ❤️

Originally posted by: LizzieBennet

Not this chapter, but perhaps the next one. It just gave me an idea, and it sort of ties in with Raavi's bucket list too.

I missed telling you that I’m also really proud of some of the phrasing and building up that went into the description of Raavi’s private moment and the highly charged conversation with Shiva.

Shiva’s behaviour may have seemed crass and uncalled for but it’s stemming from the crazed passion that runs like a thread of near insanity that connects them and I suspect, always will, not just because of who they are at their core, but also because of who they are when they’re with each other.

ShiVi have indeed taken over my writing.😆 But I’m sure they’re very different in canon than who I’ve made them out to be. 😆

You should be proud. It was perfect and so beautifully written ❤️ Knowing your hesitation, I wasn’t expecting this, not by a long shot. In fact, I am so proud! 🥺

Actually, I didn’t find it crass or uncalled for. The crazed passion was running well in the dialogues and the narration. It was blatantly obvious why he was needling her and I loved reading this forceful, demanding Shiva. In the show, he is a misogynistic guy who can only show his strength in front of Raavi. In front of his Maa, the spine wilts like a flower.

Lmao! Actually, without even watching the episodes, you have written ShiVi exactly like they are at their core together AND individually 🤣 By doing this, you have removed all the annoying TRP gaining crap that the writers and makers add to their characters, and just made them the insane jaan lene wali aashiqs that they are 😆 Dhara called it “jaan leva ishq” and she is so right. I have no idea how you did that, but that’s just how it is and the fandom thanks you for it.

Originally posted by: LizzieBennet

I missed telling you that I’m also really proud of some of the phrasing and building up that went into the description of Raavi’s private moment and the highly charged conversation with Shiva.

Shiva’s behaviour may have seemed crass and uncalled for but it’s stemming from the crazed passion that runs like a thread of near insanity that connects them and I suspect, always will, not just because of who they are at their core, but also because of who they are when they’re with each other.

ShiVi have indeed taken over my writing.😆 But I’m sure they’re very different in canon than who I’ve made them out to be. 😆

Originally posted by: LizzieBennet

Not this chapter, but perhaps the next one. It just gave me an idea, and it sort of ties in with Raavi's bucket list too.

Something I signed off on or something you kept apart?

Whatever it is That gif in the update?

U gonna send me to heaven ☺️

Originally posted by: BlackWitch

You should be proud. It was perfect and so beautifully written ❤️ Knowing your hesitation, I wasn’t expecting this, not by a long shot. In fact, I am so proud! 🥺

Actually, I didn’t find it crass or uncalled for. The crazed passion was running well in the dialogues and the narration. It was blatantly obvious why he was needling her and I loved reading this forceful, demanding Shiva. In the show, he is a misogynistic guy who can only show his strength in front of Raavi. In front of his Maa, the spine wilts like a flower.

Lmao! Actually, without even watching the episodes, you have written ShiVi exactly like they are at their core together AND individually 🤣 By doing this, you have removed all the annoying TRP gaining crap that the writers and makers add to their characters, and just made them the insane jaan lene wali aashiqs that they are 😆 Dhara called it “jaan leva ishq” and she is so right. I have no idea how you did that, but that’s just how it is and the fandom thanks you for it.

@Bold: Holy hot cakes! 😲😳

And I know, TRP baba always makes writers go nuts. They forget what or who they began writing in the first place! I recall some people telling me (in another fandom I was writing a fic for) that they should hire me, but now I think that would be disastrous - for me and them! 🤣

Jaan leva ishq? Wow I love that!

Why isn't it manifesting on the show then?

Originally posted by: EuphoricDamsel.

Something I signed off on or something you kept apart?

Whatever it is That gif in the update?

U gonna send me to heaven ☺️

Na this one was in my khoofiya list 😆

Originally posted by: LizzieBennet

Na this one was in my khoofiya list 😆

Mujhe badi chull ho rahi hai janne ki ki kya hai usme BY GOD