For Pandya Store makers: Mama's boys are unattractive

I loved this show for it's charm. I used to love Dhara-Shiva bond. The way he felt her pain when people took jabs at the godhbhari function, the way he stood by her in Dev fiasco, the way he openly told GauRa that they unnecessarily take advantage of him, the way they bonded after Kidnapping, it was beautiful.

However, Shiva recognized Dhara's partiality in yesterday's episode. It wouldn't ruin their bond if he admits that she's a human and can make mistakes, wrong decisions, and have error in judgement. But what do we get today? Bhabhi worshipping Devar.

This obsession of both Dev and Shiva for how Dhara always makes the right decisions and will stand by her no matter what may come is very unhealthy. If anything, Raavi was 100% right today. Shiva himself sees the trouble her stupid decision is causing for everyone. But what was with his reaction of,"how dare Raavi speak something negative of Dhara?!" Raavi has equal rights to be upset with her. Especially when she's getting punishment and lectures for things that she was never involved in. And it breaks my heart that Shiva even after acknowledging that Raavi's feeling his pain more than he is, didn't appreciate her gesture. Raavi maybe fine now, but will it always be like this? No girl wants to be the second woman in their man's life. Can he find an equal place in his heart for his wife in future. Can her opinion of his ever matter to him? Will he ever be able to understand Dhara's a human and remove her from the high pedestal that she's placed in his life? Will he ever be able to take a stand for Raavi against Dhara? I hope he does give Raavi that respect. Because she may not have raised them like a mom, but she's made great sacrifices, forgave a lot of things and unjust that his family has inflected on her.

A humble request to please make everyone realize that though Dhara's intensions are right, her way of doing things aren't. Please stop making her seem like mahanta ki murat with 100% correct decisions 100% times.

I think a good place to start would be to cut this Bhabi Maa nonsense. They never called her Bhabhi maa before the slot change.

They have a living mother- calling someone else a maa is a disservice to her. Yes, Dhara has made some sacrifices and yes she did help raise them in their formative years, but they can give her the love and respect without glorifying her out of proportion.

And they should not just do this for themselves but for Dhara’s sake too. It is terrible being the person on the pedestal. You are not allowed to make a single mistake, you get blamed for other people’s failings and you are expected to come up with solutions to problems that pleases everyone. This is exactly what happened in the marriage fiasco and it’s aftermath. Dhara came in the centre of the storm because she was supposed to have magically avoided all the confusion that occurred due to Dev’s indecisiveness.

No wonder Dhara has lost the plot. This is an inhuman amount of pressure that both she takes on herself and that Suman/Dev/Shiva put on her. They are adults and should learn to deal with situations in a grown up manner. She should not be solving their life problems.

Exactly!!

And the way I see it, Raavi wasn't even saying bad things about Dhara. She just only said that Dhara needs to stop being stubborn and reconsider her decisions, which btw is affecting the whole family. As a member of that family she has thr right to express her opinions about it. Even if Shiva disagreed, they both are allowed to have different opinions, aren't they? What was the need to insert the manhandling?

No one is doubting that Dhara's intentions are not at the right place, but she is not God. She can make mistakes, she already has made mistakes. Her not realizing is also okay, humans don't always have neutral perspectives. But if Shiva realizes it and calls her out on it, then it doesn't mean he is less devoted to her. He has already proved how devoted he is to her. We don't need more of this crap to understand that.

I just want to get done with this track😔

Amazing post!!

Dhara Shiva relationship was one i always look forward.

the way he always hugged her and felt the solace in her arms...it was so nice to watch till the bhooth kaand

After the thrashing she did for the bhooth khaand, I have lost all respect for her character. it took a complete 360 degree turn from there and in 2 episodes she was transformed into a self centered, selfish, psychotic woman who is just obsessed about parivar ka saath rehana, mommy cudding and showing partiality to the brat rishitha, serving warnings to an emotionally broken girl. She has now made everthing about herself. She has now made it her way or high way and Gaumbi is also now pissed with her.

Her maniac behavior today made me lose the little repsect I had for her.She has now qualified to be a vamp faking her goodness.

Also i dont even get her 5 year old behavior infront of suman to say the truth. All the stammering is coming across so fake. And the repeated leaving the house dreams...The drama has become so pathetic where writers cannot think of new tracks and repeating scenes just to complete the episode🤢

As for the boys being her blind bhakts, I can understand they have been brought up by her. She was their mother figure for 10 years and they are more connected to her more than their mother.

But I really dont get the point of marriage in their life then. All the conversations of both Devta and Shivi are revolving around bhabhi's love, her food, her this, her that. I feel bad for rishitha here alone as the girl's major insecurities crop up from dev talking about his bhabhi and family always not acknowledging her efforts( Lol i know the girl is different kid of a problem).

Shiva's manhandling today was too bad. i really wish Raavi gives him some silent treatment for the harsh behavior.She maybe ok now with dhara now. But i can actually see her emotionally connect to shiva and if shiva keeps going on and on with this blind devotion for bhabhima he is going to lose a much more pure relation in the form of Raavi.The boys if still keeping chantig bhabhi jaap will never be able to see their wives above her which is pathetic as the need for a wife will only arise in the bedroom and they have bhabhima for rest

Also can cvs please get the fact that dhara is a human who can make mistakes and it not at all wrong to make mistakes. SP 's obsession for perfect Mahaan bahu is ruining all other characters in the story

I have vented out everything. Dont even know if i made sense. Saw an opportunity and poured out everything.

PS has become so pathetic these days. I am waiting for this track to get over. I hope the cvs realise all backslash they are receiving and make amends

This show has become really irritating now. They need to tone down the bhabhi worship and also the negativity. I don't understand the need to overdo such stuff. Is it for TRP? Whatever might be the reason, this show is definitely losing its charm now. And can they tone down the hatred/anger stuff between ShiVi. It is so irritating and kills the mood. They have a good cast and a beautiful pair like ShiVi and yet they are not doing anything to utilize it properly. It is kind of sad to see the potential of a good pair and the good cast going waste like this.

Fabulous post @ML

Well, I have been subtly pointing out to the mild Oedipal clinging of the men towards Dhara. That's where I have problems with the storytellings of ITV overall. The women are myopic, and are shown only catering to the family and not to individualist sentiments.

They are projected as ‘knowing-it-all’ and home-wise. The vision of their world is that of a perpetual purblind confined to the corridors of their house and their families. There are so many layers to women in normal lives, but ITV is obsessed with making them sacrificial lambs and scapegoats for any form of wrongdoings of others.

The case here is that of badly raised men by both Gambi and Dhara, and their unhealthy adult obsession with their Bhabhi.

I had time and again reiterated that they are so attached to Dhara that every form of their emotional need is catered by her. They barely have space for other men or women in their lives.

Marriages, though initially started as business alliances and sexual Transactions, have evolved in the modern day to seek fulfilment physically and emotionally.

The problem with these man-children is that they have no value for a relationship like marriage. They see it as an extension of their family but not as a life-changing moment for them.

No woman adores a man who is that obsessed with his maternal figure. Dhara should let it go naturally rather than making it an emotional burden on anyone of them.

It's juvenile on Dhara’s part to expect the new women to fit perfectly like pieces of puzzles in their daily life without an iota of empathy about what the other women would probably want from their marriage and lives.

Someone is reprimanded for wanting ‘me time’ with her husband; someone is forced to play wife to an already complex relationship. It's hugely suffocating in the name of the greater good.

It's insane even to think about the mental, emotional and physical trauma everyone is going through in this process.

Arey marriages are not to be disciplined. They are nurtured with care, love and compassion!

Effing madness Dhara; cooking food separately is not going to bring people closer.

It's like telling people, “listen, you better start playing husband -wife to each other or else, I will cut you off.”

This is plain annoying and uncalled for. The relationship between Shiva-Dhara was so warm and charming once, but now it appears toxic and suffocating.

Originally posted by: funny_fubar

I think a good place to start would be to cut this Bhabi Maa nonsense. They never called her Bhabhi maa before the slot change.

Exactly! With the promos with slot change, they've made pandya store focus from family to Dhara's story. This in itself is big cringe. Dhara's like 29. Lol that's almost like my age. If full grown, married men called me that I'd shudder 😬. Even if I helped raise them. What would have been more logical is if she was a motherly figure before and their bond changed to bff's as they grew older and closer. Here it went Ulta. They used to treat her as friend/Bhabhi and now she's like a mom. WTF?!

They have a living mother- calling someone else a maa is a disservice to her. Yes, Dhara has made some sacrifices and yes she did help raise them in their formative years, but they can give her the love and respect without glorifying her out of proportion.

💯

And they should not just do this for themselves but for Dhara’s sake too. It is terrible being the person on the pedestal. You are not allowed to make a single mistake, you get blamed for other people’s failings and you are expected to come up with solutions to problems that pleases everyone. This is exactly what happened in the marriage fiasco and it’s aftermath. Dhara came in the centre of the storm because she was supposed to have magically avoided all the confusion that occurred due to Dev’s indecisiveness.

Exactly. Taali ek hath see nahi bajti, but ITV likes to show that FL are Mahan if something good happens and sole person to blame if it goes wrong.

No wonder Dhara has lost the plot. This is an inhuman amount of pressure that both she takes on herself and that Suman/Dev/Shiva put on her. They are adults and should learn to deal with situations in a grown up manner. She should not be solving their life problems.

She doesn't realize that she's continuing bro make them handicapped. Part of being an adult is making your own decisions, choices, and dealing with it.

Originally posted by: hedwig_potter

Exactly!!

And the way I see it, Raavi wasn't even saying bad things about Dhara. She just only said that Dhara needs to stop being stubborn and reconsider her decisions, which btw is affecting the whole family. As a member of that family she has thr right to express her opinions about it. Even if Shiva disagreed, they both are allowed to have different opinions, aren't they? What was the need to insert the manhandling?

And not only that, he asked her to shut up if she doesn't agree with Bhabhi? Wtf?! She is literally feeling your pain, trying to heal your wound, and stating the truth that Dhara's decision is creating chaos and he's like shit up. She wasn't like disrespecting Dhara like Rishita was. 😡

No one is doubting that Dhara's intentions are not at the right place, but she is not God. She can make mistakes, she already has made mistakes. Her not realizing is also okay, humans don't always have neutral perspectives. But if Shiva realizes it and calls her out on it, then it doesn't mean he is less devoted to her. He has already proved how devoted he is to her. We don't need more of this crap to understand that.👏💯

I just want to get done with this track😔

Originally posted by: ItsmePriya

Amazing post!!

Dhara Shiva relationship was one i always look forward.

the way he always hugged her and felt the solace in her arms...it was so nice to watch till the bhooth kaand

💯

After the thrashing she did for the bhooth khaand, I have lost all respect for her character. it took a complete 360 degree turn from there and in 2 episodes she was transformed into a self centered, selfish, psychotic woman who is just obsessed about parivar ka saath rehana, mommy cudding and showing partiality to the brat rishitha, serving warnings to an emotionally broken girl. She has now made everthing about herself. She has now made it her way or high way and Gaumbi is also now pissed with her.

Her maniac behavior today made me lose the little repsect I had for her.She has now qualified to be a vamp faking her goodness.

Also i dont even get her 5 year old behavior infront of suman to say the truth. All the stammering is coming across so fake. And the repeated leaving the house dreams...The drama has become so pathetic where writers cannot think of new tracks and repeating scenes just to complete the episode🤢

Couldn't have said it better.🤮🤮🤮

As for the boys being her blind bhakts, I can understand they have been brought up by her. She was their mother figure for 10 years and they are more connected to her more than their mother.

But I really dont get the point of marriage in their life then. All the conversations of both Devta and Shivi are revolving around bhabhi's love, her food, her this, her that. I feel bad for rishitha here alone as the girl's major insecurities crop up from dev talking about his bhabhi and family always not acknowledging her efforts( Lol i know the girl is different kid of a problem).

Shiva's manhandling today was too bad. i really wish Raavi gives him some silent treatment for the harsh behavior.She maybe ok now with dhara now. But i can actually see her emotionally connect to shiva and if shiva keeps going on and on with this blind devotion for bhabhima he is going to lose a much more pure relation in the form of Raavi.The boys if still keeping chantig bhabhi jaap will never be able to see their wives above her which is pathetic as the need for a wife will only arise in the bedroom and they have bhabhima for rest

When you put it in this context it is so disgusting. Any girl would feel cheap and useless because of this blind worshipping. They don't have their voice, are like maids because they responsibilities for cooking and cleaning when BhabhiMa's unavailable, then a tool to lust after and baby making machine. Argh. It's really pathetic.

Also can cvs please get the fact that dhara is a human who can make mistakes and it not at all wrong to make mistakes. SP 's obsession for perfect Mahaan bahu is ruining all other characters in the story

I have vented out everything. Dont even know if i made sense. Saw an opportunity and poured out everything.

PS has become so pathetic these days. I am waiting for this track to get over. I hope the cvs realise all backslash they are receiving and make amends💯

I am no longer excited to watch the show as it releases. I look forward to this forum/ffs/oS and insta posts more than this show. As is, we don't get ShiVi in half of the episodes or get two seconds worth. Which I can catch up to at a later time. Everything else gets ff.

Originally posted by: janecastle

This show has become really irritating now. They need to tone down the bhabhi worship and also the negativity. I don't understand the need to overdo such stuff. Is it for TRP? Whatever might be the reason, this show is definitely losing its charm now. And can they tone down the hatred/anger stuff between ShiVi. It is so irritating and kills the mood. They have a good cast and a beautiful pair like ShiVi and yet they are not doing anything to utilize it properly. It is kind of sad to see the potential of a good pair and the good cast going waste like this.

Exactly! I wish we could convey this message to SP or makers whoever the hell is responsible for changes in character and stories.