my take on vani's relationship & the role reversal

randomly thought about this at 5am and thought i'd analyze more here with you guys. i know we complain a lot about bani, i have several times. we keep wondering why she behaves the way she does with him, why she doesn't just melt. at the same time, we're like why does veer keep going behind her? why doesn't he just leave her and let her come after him. but when we really think about it, in normal itv shows, we have the male lead act exactly like bani and we have female leads do what veer does. we never really complain then because we're used to that. we're used to a male lead that tadpao's the wife and we're used to the wife running around making him love her like veer does. but the total opposite has been shown here, bani is our male lead. she's the one who shows attitude and she's the one who flip flops every two days like we've seen other male leads do. veer on the other hand is our female lead, he is calm and level headed. he understands that he needs to deal with her the way he does by just giving her that love constantly. he knows that eventually she'll melt but he has to keep at it. that's what we see in every show na? but i guess because we've never really seen the male/female lead switch it's weird for us here to digest veer running after her and bani not melting. but i'd say, at least for the first time, we're getting a male lead run after the female lead and not the other way around. for once, the guy loves the girl more. it feels as if the girl is more in love usually, she's more worried about the weight of her sindoor and mangalsutra but in this case, we saw veer do the honors, he was more worried about it than bani. she didn't take the marriage seriously initially but he did, if we flip the genders, that's how a lot of shows start off, right? i think when the role reversal set in to my mind, i stopped being annoyed over bani because she's just doing the usual male lead stuff. what do you guys think?

Yeah bani is behaving like gul khan male lead who are arrogant, egoistic and Veer is like balaji female lead. Who does everything to save her marriage.

That's why I always say that veer is an ideal husband. Regular ITV ki female leads at least ro kar apna stress toh nikal leti hain bechara veer tu har waqt hanstaa rehta hai. Veer ki sehn sakhti bhot zaida hai. That's make him best male character on ITV.

Pehle toh subhah k 5 baje uth k tu ne yeh sab socha? Neend nahi aati? Upar se itni thand!!! Khair jo bhi ho! Atleast tu ne socha toh! I mean exactly sahi socha! Yehi baat toh main aur Sohini keh rahe hai kabse! Maine bhi bohat pehle bola tha. Sohini ne toh clearly samjha dia apne statement mein.. Maine parso ki review and kal ek post ki thi Vani related.. Wahan pe bhi she said.. Mere paas copy hai uska coj main insta pe bhi di thi. Wait i m posting that!

Here is Sohini's statement -

Every husband-wife has a separate equation going on about them. As a third person, we could find it disrespectful or humiliating, or insulting, but their equation is only them, no outsider or third party can comment on it. For example, initially how Shivaay treated Anika, and Anika gave it back to him. Then after marriage, Shivaay mistreated Anika many times, and Anika put up with it because unconsciously she understood where Shivaay comes from, what his thought process is, she always understood that the intent was not to hurt anyone but to protect or safeguard someone in his own quirky SSO style. In our society, wives are always supposed to understand the husbands and put up with them. And that is exactly what is shown on TV. Women are mahaan; husbands are weak. We say why don't these women have self-respect? If a husband is doing that, why is it considered so wrong? For Veeranshu, his love is greater than anything else for him, is it so wrong? For Bani her duties are greater than any emotion, is that so wrong? Emotionally and as a person, Veeranshu is much much superior to Bani and it is his love, trust, and understanding, which makes him that. We love him that way. I am okay with that. Infact, I appreciate a man making an effort here, instead of the woman doing it.

Originally posted by: _NINA_

Yeah bani is behaving like gul khan male lead who are arrogant, egoistic and Veer is like balaji female lead. Who does everything to save her marriage.

That's why I always say that veer is an ideal husband. Regular ITV ki female leads at least ro kar apna stress toh nikal leti hain bechara veer tu har waqt hanstaa rehta hai. Veer ki sehn sakhti bhot zaida hai. That's make him best male character on ITV.

haha exactly, a gul khan ML and a balaji FL. well put. he is indeed the best ML on ITV. haven't seen someone like this. nice to see the switch actually!

Originally posted by: Dwipanita

Pehle toh subhah k 5 baje uth k tu ne yeh sab socha? Neend nahi aati? Upar se itni thand!!! Khair jo bhi ho! Atleast tu ne socha toh! I mean exactly sahi socha! Yehi baat toh main aur Sohini keh rahe hai kabse! Maine bhi bohat pehle bola tha. Sohini ne toh clearly samjha dia apne statement mein.. Perse parso ki review and kal ek post ki thi Vani related.. Wahan pe bhi she said.. Mere paas copy hai uska coj main insta pe bhi di thi. Wait i m posting that!

yaar i woke up cause i wasn't feeling well and then bas before going back to sleep vani ka yaad aa rahi thi 🤣 i've been thinking about it lekin kabhi kabhi i forget and get annoyed at bani lekin jab properly socha in the morning na i realized ki yeh total role reversal hogayi and isi liye it's a lil weird for us i guess because we aren't used to a character like this in ITV. reading that--

Originally posted by: Dwipanita

Here is Sohini's statement -

Every husband-wife has a separate equation going on about them. As a third person, we could find it disrespectful or humiliating, or insulting, but their equation is only them, no outsider or third party can comment on it. For example, initially how Shivaay treated Anika, and Anika gave it back to him. Then after marriage, Shivaay mistreated Anika many times, and Anika put up with it because unconsciously she understood where Shivaay comes from, what his thought process is, she always understood that the intent was not to hurt anyone but to protect or safeguard someone in his own quirky SSO style. In our society, wives are always supposed to understand the husbands and put up with them. And that is exactly what is shown on TV. Women are mahaan; husbands are weak. We say why don't these women have self-respect? If a husband is doing that, why is it considered so wrong? For Veeranshu, his love is greater than anything else for him, is it so wrong? For Bani her duties are greater than any emotion, is that so wrong? Emotionally and as a person, Veeranshu is much much superior to Bani and it is his love, trust, and understanding, which makes him that. We love him that way. I am okay with that. Infact, I appreciate a man making an effort here, instead of the woman doing it.

this makes sense, veer knows bani and gets her. plus i agree it's nice seeing him make the effort, hamesha ladkiya kyun uff

My way of analyzing a character is basically more novellistic. I genuinely believe ki past experiences matter in the beginning of the relationship.

If you see in that way, Nageshwari was rather a free bird. She would feel and give it back. Chap gayi hai woh experiences Bani ke dil mein.

Toh I always thought that Nageshwari bore 10,000 divya varsh of hatred for Aakesh. That is her first great truth. In place of that if she had let 10,000 divya varsh of stronger love for hriday, Bani would have had a different intensity of love for Jay. Just look at Veer, he's the product of Aakesh's 10,000 divya varsh of bearing love for Nageshwari. Woh kehte hai na ki pyaar nafrat se zyada takatwar hota hai. Vani's magic was because the intensities of their feeling for both sides. Nafrat hi sahi but match karti thi Veer ke intensity se. Shuruat Veer se hoti hai aur Veer pe hi khatam hoti hai. If Aakesh was obssessed in his love for her, Bani was also obsessed with her hatred for Veer. She holds on super tight to it because that was the beginning point for her. That was all she could think about. Aag dono taraf lagi thi.

Opposite to that Hriday didn't have that fire intensity. Neither did Jay. Aur yeh baat kitne hi log kitni hi baar keh chuke hai so I don't have to repeat that part again.

Now, Veer ki intensity wahi hai. Pyaar mein deewana. That is his characteristic feature. Bani ko woh apne sar ka taaj manta hai. Zor zabardasti jhukane ki koshish karke dekh li, koi result toh aaya nahi ab sar jhuka ke jeetne ki kosish kar raha hai.

It that old of hatred. Ek hafte mein khatam hone wali baat nahi thi. Jab Veer ne khud jhuk ke treated her like a Queen, use bhi jhukna pada. Jhuki hai woh compared to how haughty she was in the beginning. It confounds her now. Everything she had accepted as 'facts' about Veer were beginning to shatter. It exactly started since Meera had told him he can't forcefully keep Bani caged. The moment Veer let go off Bani, she was surprised.

She thought he is heartless but then found out that without knowing any familiarity to her, he saved her. Pata toh Veer ko hai hi nahi ki woh Bani thi jise Veer ne bachaya. Veer opened up himself to her and let her freely make up her mind about him. Koi commentry nahi, kuch nahi. It shook her thoughts that Veer could be someone who can save anyone's life.

She had let herself believe Veer cannot have softness for anyone in his life but then she saw him with his mother. Itna pyaar aur itni care karte hue dekhke Bani's old perspective had changed. She would never believe the feelings that come to her from his side because she doesn't see it from a third person perspective. Dekhne wale ko dikhta hai ki woh kitna pyaar hai but the one on the receiving end only sees from his pov. But here, Bani was the spectator. She's never seen him that soft and that caring ki har choti si choti cheez ka bhi khyal rakhe.

Every girl makes up her mind about how a man is based on the way he treats his mother. She is the first woman in his life who has that importance. Uske baad it is going to be his wife.

Bani thought that Veer wouldn't have faith in her because woh itna bharosa khud nahi karti Veer par. Like they say ki ek chor ko saare hi log chor lagte hai. Because Bani doesn't trust him, she thinks he also doesn't trust her but when he believed her, she was shocked. She asked him because she wanted to know if he would become her enemy and stand as a shield to his mother. She wasn't expecting him to believe her. Just a stab in the dark and she asked. Thodi si hope thi because she was beginning to believe that Veer is not evil.

Veer ka pyaar hi kuch aisa hai. That is what makes him such an amazing character. He's free of that toxic masculinity that he can't bend down to a woman or such nonsense thoughts. Veer toh hai azaad panchi. Bani is totally uljhi hui.

Jab saare old perspectives toot rahe hai toh she's trying to understand him again. Koshish kar rahi hai. That's why she smiles when he teases her. Ab use woh acchi lagti hai. Purani kechuli badli hai, uske saath purane perspectives bhi badal rahi hai.

Its like the budding stage of a romance. The girl wants to be chased around and that why she tries to act all 'I am not in love with you or anything' but accha toh lagta hai. She's enjoying it. When she's enjoying it, he's ready to let her enjoy it.

Abhi toh pyaar aaya hai, phir thodi nazdeeki badi hai... thode aur time mein she'll admit to be falling for him.

I m pissed off with bani

Now i want role reversal..

Veer ki taraf se tashan dekhna hai mujhe

Uska fake anger dekhna hai for bani

Originally posted by: nainaasharmaa

randomly thought about this at 5am and thought i'd analyze more here with you guys. i know we complain a lot about bani, i have several times. we keep wondering why she behaves the way she does with him, why she doesn't just melt. at the same time, we're like why does veer keep going behind her? why doesn't he just leave her and let her come after him. but when we really think about it, in normal itv shows, we have the male lead act exactly like bani and we have female leads do what veer does. we never really complain then because we're used to that. we're used to a male lead that tadpao's the wife and we're used to the wife running around making him love her like veer does. but the total opposite has been shown here, bani is our male lead. she's the one who shows attitude and she's the one who flip flops every two days like we've seen other male leads do. veer on the other hand is our female lead, he is calm and level headed. he understands that he needs to deal with her the way he does by just giving her that love constantly. he knows that eventually she'll melt but he has to keep at it. that's what we see in every show na? but i guess because we've never really seen the male/female lead switch it's weird for us here to digest veer running after her and bani not melting. but i'd say, at least for the first time, we're getting a male lead run after the female lead and not the other way around. for once, the guy loves the girl more. it feels as if the girl is more in love usually, she's more worried about the weight of her sindoor and mangalsutra but in this case, we saw veer do the honors, he was more worried about it than bani. she didn't take the marriage seriously initially but he did, if we flip the genders, that's how a lot of shows start off, right? i think when the role reversal set in to my mind, i stopped being annoyed over bani because she's just doing the usual male lead stuff. what do you guys think?

You have put a valid point there 👍 considering the view point of a regular ITV viewer. This role reversal is so refreshing.

But if speak for myself as a viewer who usually avoids Balaji shows because I can't stand female lead being abused left, right, center and for 1000s of episodes. And the last Gul Khan show I watched was Ishqbaaz and I got so annoyed with shivaay being an ass with his naam khoon khandan complex. After daksh misunderstanding was resolved he was emotionally stuckup on this complex and took so much time to accept Anika. I remember he said something like, I like Anika but since she comes from humble background so I don't think she will be a good mother for my children... something along these lines. And God I was so mad.😡

The point of this long rant is that my problem as viewer who generally avoids such stuff will get annoyed with the leads' being irritating aur bhaiyya main tou kossofy kron gi ji bhar k because for me problem is not role reversal. A lead being an ass is a lead being an ass. Irrespective of gender. Period.

( That's my point of view, no offense.😳)