Abhigya FF: It lasts a lifetime - On Hold - Page 4

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Miss.M thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago
#31
Hi Everyone.. Here's a new part. I'm trying to get the story to move ahead but my brain is not letting me go ahead. I think its almost there though and it is moving forward(I hope I don't get stuck in another long loop like this one). sorry for the rant!
Anyways hope you enjoy it.

Constructive criticism and feedback welcome as always :)

IT LASTS A LIFETIME - PART 4

Her father was reading the newspaper whilst the news on TV was going at a low volume. She knew he'd have done some exercise to keep himself occupied, even though the doctor had told him not to strain his body and give it time to recover. They went for a run together in the morning at that was their exclusive time together. She was close to her dad and shared everything with him. Bulbul on the other hand liked doing everything with flair so got along more with their mother.

Bulbul came running out from their room complaining. She was annoyed that she didn't get admission in the same school as Pragya but refused to understand that her year had full classes and there were no more spots. It wasn't really that much of a problem as she quite liked her new school but she wanted to study with her Di and that annoyed her that they weren't going to the same school.Her mother had said that they would try and get her in the following year but chances seemed quite slim.

Bulbul started chattering about the friends she'd made, what classes she had and already decided which teachers she liked and disliked. Pragya only half listened while putting all her things away and getting her books out for homework. After freshening up and having a small snack that Amma had kept ready, she finally spoke to Bulbul and told her to take a breather and get her books for homework. It was Pragya's responsibility to get Bulbul to finish her homework as she never listened to anyone else. They would wait for their mother to come home before having dinner as a family. It was hard keeping Bulbul entertained once homework was over, unfortunately she didn't like reading so Pragya knew that she'd have to do something else to distract her. Pragya suggested a hot oil massage knowing that Bulbul loved having her head massaged and hair oiled so they would be soft when she washed her hair out and readily agreed. She would keep quiet as that was the only thing that her Di requested when giving her a massage.

After dinner Pragya read for a while till her mother came and switched off the light. Pragya was tempted get the torch out of the drawer and continue reading as she had just gotten to an interesting turn in the book but she knew her mum would find out. Her mum always knew when she was reading with the torch under the blanket and she didn't want to disappoint her. She also had to wake up early for her time with her dad. The last thought that came to her mind was that of Abhishek stopping the kids at school from bullying her and she fell asleep with a smile on her face.

Abhi got home and quickly freshened up and made his way to help dadi. He knew taiji was an expert at making excuses when it came to doing the housework. He never heard her complain, she always said that taiji was like that daughter she never had and you accept family no matter what they are like. Aliyah was seated outside the house on the front steps and after making sure that she had all her books for that day's homework and telling her to come and get him if she needed any help, he continued towards the kitchen where dadi was making dinner. He quickly got all the plates and cutlery out and arranged them on the floor, all the hole telling dadi about his day. It was a ritual him and dadi had and his day felt incomplete if he didn't tell her every nitty gritty detail.

He told her everything about the new girl, how she was in Purab's class and how they helped her today. Dadi was glad that she had gone right somewhere. She knew that her Abhi had a heart of gold and no matter what he would never let her down.

After dinner abhi went outside and sat with his books to finish his homework. He knew that everyone in school thought him to be an average regular guy and he never acted any different, to change their misconception. He felt it was noone's business but his as to what he did with his brain. Purab came and joined him awhile later and they both sat together, each doing their own work in comfortable silence. Abhi finished before Purab and sat doodling in his book lost in his thoughts all the while humming an unknown tune.

Purab knew that he was thinking about something and would only mention it when he was good and ready, but curiosity still made him ask, "Bhai is everything alright? Anything you want to talk about?"

Abhi looked at him and replied that he was thinking about the guitar he'd seen in the shop window close to their school. Purab knew which one he was talking about. It was quite obvious, abhi always slowed down as they neared the shop and he would look at it longingly. But he knew that they would not be able to afford it. Purab never thought of him and Abhi as separate and knew Abhi thought the same.

They spoke for a while longer and called it a night as it was getting late. Purab went back to his place a few doors down and Abhi walked back inside the house. Everyone had settled for the night and Abhi made sure that a plate of food was ready for tayaji when he got home later. He got into bed with dadi and Aliyah and saw tear filled brown eyes as his eyes closed.

Aafrah-SA thumbnail
10th Anniversary Thumbnail Navigator Thumbnail + 3
Posted: 10 years ago
#32
awww...i cant stop drooling over the cuteness of the story!!!
Please please please update soon...my god the innocence in their attraction, it goes to aa different level!!
Abhi being the responsible guy, his closeness to daadi, BB being the bubly chirpy talkative kid, Pragya being solemn and responsible...but i found intriguinglynice was Pragya's attachment with her dad..its just a guess, but maybe when her dad will abruptly leave them, she will fully be emotionally dependent on Abhi and he, being the responsible older brother in the family, wouldnt find it difficult to support her emotionally at this tender age!
But what I am curious about is, how would this story reach the current show track of hatred between the two, how will you fill up that gap and validate their hatred!
I know you have some magic up ypur sleeve..but plz plz plzzz update soon and pleaseee give us more of their childhood updates!! I am LOVING them!!
⭐️⭐️⭐️
👏
--simmi-- thumbnail
11th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail + 2
Posted: 10 years ago
#33
This story has to be the cutest I have read! Great so far moving forward at a good pace! Thanks for this update!!
Miss.M thumbnail
10th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail
Posted: 10 years ago
#34

Originally posted by: aafrah

awww...i cant stop drooling over the cuteness of the story!!!

Please please please update soon...my god the innocence in their attraction, it goes to aa different level!!
Abhi being the responsible guy, his closeness to daadi, BB being the bubly chirpy talkative kid, Pragya being solemn and responsible...but i found intriguinglynice was Pragya's attachment with her dad..its just a guess, but maybe when her dad will abruptly leave them, she will fully be emotionally dependent on Abhi and he, being the responsible older brother in the family, wouldnt find it difficult to support her emotionally at this tender age!
But what I am curious about is, how would this story reach the current show track of hatred between the two, how will you fill up that gap and validate their hatred!
I know you have some magic up ypur sleeve..but plz plz plzzz update soon and pleaseee give us more of their childhood updates!! I am LOVING them!!
⭐️⭐️⭐️
👏


Aww thank you aafrah! I have a vague idea of how I'm getting there but just I want there to be some more cute moments between the two. Hopefully it works out... If not I'm going to start packing the brains of all you brilliant writers on the forum:)
-mina- thumbnail
16th Anniversary Thumbnail Stunner Thumbnail + 3
Posted: 10 years ago
#35
mini-me, this story is the best!! loving their sweet childhood lives. you're showing that life back then has its own complications and challenges and responsibilities, so worth telling stories about. thank you for giving us this fresh angle on abhigya. so sweet that they're both already drawn to each other. am really liking how you've shown their roles in their households. and thank god and much congrats to you, you have found a place to redeem & truly show the purab-abhi bond. love beyond words how they consider themselves as one. AND!! my favourite moment -"He felt it was noone's business but his as to what he did with his brain" <--yess!! love this!
the story is over all so atmospheric and so well detailed and i am rally, really enjoying it. feels like a book, not quite fanfic! so thank you thank you, and all the best, do keep writing!! 😃
Diahh thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail + 2
Posted: 10 years ago
#36
Min min!! 😃 Loved this!!! Awww AbhiGya are cute or what!? Their daily routines, ending the day while thinking of eachother!!! So so sweett!!! adorable really!! 😳 Looking forward to more and I kind of don't want them to grow up coz they are just perfect the way they are! 😛 😆

Originally posted by: Mkgp88


Aww dhingli! Thanks... You're very kind.i sort of got the idea from your drabbles and might pinch some of your ideas so credit goes to you 😊 and everyone really 😊 I will update soon but you need to update the turning point jaldi as well


Thank YOU for this comment Min min!😃 It's nice to know my drabbles is one of the causes for this beautiful story of yours!! And trying to finish turning point sequel soon! 😉
Tupimanmus thumbnail
Posted: 10 years ago
#37
Oh I must say. Quiet a talented writer you are, indeed. Work some more on your vocabulary and it will be a long, fine road in writing.

Hmmm... I like the story's concept and the path where it's going to. The characters are linked to their childhood perfectly.

You want to make it (the story) short or long cause if you're trying for an SS, it should get into progressing soon enough, otherwise it is fine.

Sorry for posting after such a long time. Had a writer's block going on and the bothersome routine.

Update soon.
sara7iris thumbnail
11th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail Networker 1 Thumbnail
Posted: 10 years ago
#38
beautiful and cute update I love it ...pls update soon

rbb1 thumbnail
19th Anniversary Thumbnail Elite Thumbnail + 4
Posted: 10 years ago
#39
Nice update aww Abhi is so sweet he helps everyone that's nice bulbul and Pragya have such sweet relationship can't wait to read more
Miss.M thumbnail
10th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail
Posted: 10 years ago
#40
NOTE

Thank you eveyone for the feedback. I know the story is kind of slow and really most of that was meant to be two posts but I am getting stuck with the ideas so I'm just posting as I've been writing (I figure that way I can't change my mind 😊)
I'm getting quite busy at work but dont know when I'll be able to update and I might have to go back and re-think a few of the details so please bear with me.
Edited by Mkgp88 - 10 years ago

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