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Kuch Rang Pyar Ke Aise Bhi : They Left Me When I Needed Them So I Left Them When They Needed Me - How Constructive Is That?
Today's topic is a little bit tricky.
It's about young people becoming aggressive due to their elder's mistakes.
And I am not sure if my words will come across as and the way I want them to. I will not indulge myself into justifying whether 'Live In Relationship' is alright for two adult individuals or not. Honestly speaking, if someone asks me, as an individual I will say 'to each his own', there should be freedom for choosing your own lifestyle, that they are adults and they would know how they want to live. Fair and square.
But if I had a small sister like Nikki and I had been a protective sister to her, while staying in India, if I got to know she is in a live in relationship, would I have been that casual and preach about 'to each his own'? If it had been in some western country, probably yes, I would have accepted it. But if it's in India, then probably NO. I would not have been as casual as I should be. Not because I have a problem with 'live in' but I know people around me in our country have a problem with it and that would bring problems for my young sibling.
Sometimes, even if we are too advance with our thoughts, we are skeptical to follow it because the world around us might not be as progressive as we are.
Dev and Sonakshi's fears are exactly like that. Both are quite progressive individuals. They might not judge another girl like Nikki who is in a live in relationship with someone. They will probably brush off the matter. But when it comes to your own sister, knowing the world around you, you will get protective, scared and anxious.
Now that's about Dev and Sonakshi. Coming to Ishwari. The lady who was seen wondering why her son and daughter in law didn't want to get married then and there even though they were so much in love and was thinking whether there is too much of generation gap between herself and her son, what would she do if she comes to know of Nikki's decision? That's going to be a big blow to a mother like Ishwari.
Now coming to Nikki. The main point is not about her becoming a rebellion. The main point is about why she became one.
The point is not whether her staying with a guy in a live in relationship is right or wrong. The main point is how her mother and brother's ignorance, mistakes and depressed attitude affected her during a very tender age and how it has altered her thoughts entirely.
At the age of growth, the age when she should have been nurtured the most, she was made to face turbulence in married life in her own family, disturbances in family, a broken brother, an indifferent mother with no one really around to speak to her, to talk to her or even to care about her.
The most pampered child of the Dixits became a brat. Reason? She witnessed the hollowness of relationships in her own house so brutally that it somehow affected her in a way that's irrevocable now. Forget about 'Marriage', she doesn't believe in the concept of 'Family', because her own family neglected her existence.
Take a look at her own words -
Family Sirf Naam Ke Relations Hai Poori Life Question Ban Jaati Hai.
Sawaalo Ke Jawaab Dete Raho Lekin Kisiko Samajh Mein Nahi Aana Hai
I don't believe in the concept of Shaadi.
Galat Insaan Se Shaadi Karne Se Better Hai, Kisike Saath Live In Mein Rehna
Shaadi Ki Wajah Se Aap Aur Dev Bhaiya Itne Saalo Tak Durr Rahe. Itne Saalo Tak Dard Jhela. Uska Kya? Mujhe Shaadi Ke Chakkar Mein Apne Love Ka The End Nahi Karna
Ghar, Family Mere Liye Matter Nahi Karti
She doesn't believe in marriage - Because she saw how pathetically her brother's marriage failed. For a kid of 16, 17 or 18, the trauma of breaking marriages within family members stays for a long time.
We might say that marriage is just breaking between two individuals, but when you have kids in the house who care about their siblings, are close to them, we never know how such bitter breaking up affect them. It somehow, alters their mindset entirely about the institution.
Her perfect brother and her wonderful Sona di's relationship didn't work and not only that, it took away from her whatever she had. Why will she believe in marriage? Forget about siblings, don't the kids whose parents have troublesome marriage yet continuing with it, become all tired and non-believer in marriage while growing up? She directly used example of her brother's depressed state, Sona's solitude while defending her decisions. It means, that the young mind was troubled so much during those days, that it somehow made her a complete different individual.
She said, 'I am happy in my HONEST relationship with Laksh'. The point is not if her relationship with Laksh is honest or not. But the point is that, she thinks her relationship with her mother isn't honest, her brother isn't honest. Her relationship with her family wasn't honest. And such kind of thoughts are destructive.
Nikki need not start believing in marriages immediately. But her faith in 'Family' should come back. The moment when her brother played video games with her, he was honest with her. In fact she was the only one with whom Dev lived his childhood. The moment when Sonakshi gave her wisdom, she was honest with her. The moments when Elena taught her literature, she was honest with her.
The moments when Ishwari referred to her as 'Daadi Maa' for scolding her mother, she was honest with her. The moments when Ishwari always ran behind her with a pouch of hair oil, the reason why Nikki complained that her friends called her 'Oily Batori' in college, were honest moments. The moments when she made her mother learn why 'serum' is better than 'oil' for her hair, were honest moments.
Rejecting all those honest bonds and moments that she lived for 17 years, for receiving ignorance for a few years due to turbulence at home isn't also right.
Her belief and faith in 'Family' needs to return. Nikki needs to return home. And it will be tough to restore her already altered mind. You see, there are two kinds of people who are very tough to convince - The oldest generation and the youngest generation. Both are always too adamant in letting go off their prejudices. And this prejudice of Nikki is born due to her family's fault.
CID
Iss Pyaar Ko Kya Naam Doon
