DevAkshi: The Breakdown & Possible Resurrection

CXYZ thumbnail
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Posted: 8 years ago
#1

Hi friends,

Here is my new article on DevAkshi, do take a look!

DevAkshi: The Breakdown & Possible Resurrection

cheers!

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rahulvats12 thumbnail
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Posted: 8 years ago
#2
Lovely and beautiful post...👏
TFS 😊
NBT-BV thumbnail
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Posted: 8 years ago
#3

Originally posted by: CXYZ


Without getting too much into the actual incidents/events of how this happened, the fact remains that while fate or circumstances or family or other external forces played a part, DevAkshi themselves also had a big part to play in all that happened.

From my perspective, here are some of the very glaringly obvious causes:
Lack of Trust
Lack of Respect
Lack of Proper Communication

Trust & Respect are 2 extremely important pillars of any relationship. A relationship can somehow survive without Love but without Trust & Respect, it invariably ends up being short-lived. Communication is the 3rd pillar which keeps the other 2 pillars secure and in turn keeps the relationship strong.

Trust
Dev has had implicit faith in Sona. His constant As always, you are right, Ms. Bose' is not merely to pay lip-service, it has been a genuinely heartfelt comment.

I don't agree. Trust is an abstract term and has no boundaries and is unconditional. Faith and Trust are not the same. Dev has faith but not trust as you said.

People may have faith over a rope walker who crosses at a height of 200 mts between two buildings on a rope with no safety. But if he asks one person to sit on his shoulders while he's crossing - who will agree?. People who have faith but no trust will hesitate to sit while the one who trust him will not hesitate for a moment.

Trust can't have an iota of doubt. Dev has every doubt on sona in the matter of greater importance. Dev trusts Ish but not Sona. Its a just faith.

Sona on the other hand, believes she has seen many such facets of Dev which has made her question her trust for him. Her trust is not implicit, it is conditional.

Result: Trust levels are not the same.

Respect
Dev has always Respected Sona & has also been extremely proud of Sona for her achievements & for who she is.
Sona has not really shown that kind of Respect for Dev. While she does like many of his qualities, Respecting him for his achievements & for who he is has somewhat been lacking.
Respect: Respect amongst them was unequal.

Respect is earned and not begged / forced / lured. Sona has earned her respect with her work and deeds while IMO Dev in most of the circumstances forced / lured people.

Communication
Both Dev & Sonakshi are equally guilty of not communicating things to each other for various reasons. While Dev prefers postponing finding long-term solutions to problems & preferred letting things be, Sona preferred facing problems head-on & finding long-term solutions. Yet, both of them NEVER DISCUSSED THEIR VIEWS WITH EACH OTHER & let things simmer underneath their happy space together.
Result: Lack of proper communication from both sides made things worse.


So, what's the problem?
Of the 3 causes, Lack of communication appears to be THE MAJOR CAUSE. They not really confiding their inner fears, their wants & expectations from each other, led to things building up & forming a 'Pressure Cooker' effect. Things finally reached such a stage where the pressure was so much that they had to EXPLODE & get it all out of their system. The ugly war of words which eventually led to their separation was as a result of just that.


The lack of communication also resulted in they not addressing the Lack of Trust & Lack of Respect issues.

If only Sona had told Dev about how she was treated in the Dixit household, especially before marriage

This is called childish complaining.

If only Sona had told Dev what kind of support she expected from him

This is begging for support

If only Sona had aired her disappointment & frustration over Dev not standing up for her at her humiliation by Neha, Ish, Mami & Vicky

This is again begging for support. No upright person would like to do this.

If only ...


If only Dev had told Sona about his inner fear & confirmation that Ish had never accepted her

Dev deceived sona by not telling due to selfish motive. This is not lack of communication. In reality he should have asked his mother for the reasons of her dislike.

If only Dev had discussed about the pregnancy issues with her

This is also deception.

If only Dev had told Sona what kind of support he expected from her

He's asked for it time and again but never respected the support she gave him and tried for his family - esp Neha

if only ...


If only they had JOINTLY discussed their individual problems & tried to find a JOINT solution.
If only they had both realized that marriage was not just about keeping only the family happy or keeping only themselves happy but was about keeping EVERYONE happy at the same time, by striking the right balance between the 2.
If only...
If only...

I can go on about the individual if only' & their joint if only' but I think I have addressed the crux of the matter (I hope!)


Itne if lagakar to mami bhi MAMA ban jaaye - phir what's the reason to fight ??????


How is it now?

Now, 7 years have passed, things have changed, both Dev & Sona have changed too but their misgivings & misunderstandings remain.

So, what next?

Where do DevAkshi go from here now?

3 choices:

1. Do nothing, maintain status quo

2. Resolve their issues & decide to keep their relationship amicable but decide not to be together

3. Resolve their issues and decided to get back together.

In my view, Option 1 is a No-No. Holding on to the past & living with a lot of negativity is never a good option, certainly not for them.

Fate/Destiny appears to have given them a choice to possibly have a 2nd chance. They have a chance to at least resolve their issues, staying together or not is something they have to decide. But at least by resolving their issues, they can be at peace. So its gotta be Option 2 or 3.

The romantic in me of course wants DevAkshi to get together. Also KRPKAB is a TV show & one that has promised a positive feel-good story, so chances of them getting back together appear very high. So I am going with Option 3.

So, how do they reconcile?

I feel somewhere their daughter Soha will play a part in bringing them together. She may not be the reason, but will likely be a catalyst for them to eventually reunite. Their love for Soha will bring back the beautiful times they shared together & help to re-kindle their love.

And once they get back together, how do they sustain their relationship?

No relationship comes with a handbook on the Do's & Don'ts. More so in a marriage, where it is a lifetime commitment, not having a handbook means you make mistakes, you learn along the way & try not to repeat them again. DevAkshi have made mistakes, many of them. They now have a chance to correct their past mistakes and forge a deeper, stronger bond together.

Remember the time when they decided to bring in some cheer & make everyone happy during Diwali? That was a JOINT DECISION, a very simple act but it worked wonders & brought happiness back into the family.

That is what is needed. As Sona said long ago, 'Agar hum saath honge to sabko hara denge. I just want to be with you'.

At the end of the day. this is what it's all about. TALK, air your problems, FIND a solution, ACT on it TOGETHER.
DON'T GIVE UP SO EASILY, YOU ARE A TEAM.

Dev & Sona are 2 great people but as DevAkshi, they COMPLETE EACH OTHER.

And on that happy, positive thought, I finally go back to getting some of my personal pending work done!




I have just to repeat what once ISH said and thats the bitter truth of life and love.

Rahiman Dhaga prem ka mat todo chatkai,
Tute toh phir na jude, Jude gaanth pad jaaye.

Once a glass / mirror has cracked, it can't be joined.

So its better to leave and live a peaceful life then to live a compromised life.


Edited by NBT-BV - 8 years ago
CXYZ thumbnail
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Posted: 8 years ago
#4

Well, well, well...

According to me, marriage is about 2 people in a relationship TOGETHER. If talking, discussing, sharing ur inner thoughts & fears, airing ur frustrations & disappointments freely is tantamount to childish complaining & begging for support, then the 2 people in question are better off being on their own. They don't need to be in a relationship & look out for each other or even support each other.

Talking things out & making your partner aware can never ever be termed childish complaining, at least not in my world where relationships are important and need to be worked on when problems arise. Asking for support from your partner can never be begging. Not voicing your concerns yet expecting your partner to be a mind reader & solve problems is not the way I look at relationships or problem solving.

Your post clearly shows you don't favor Dev much. That's fine n that's entirely your view. You also don't believe it makes much sense for DevAkshi to get back together.

As my article is all about finding ways to resolve their issues & for a haapily ever-after DevAkshi, I think it doesn't make much sense for me too to offer any additional points in favour of my PoV.

I rest my case.



Originally posted by: NBT-BV




<font size="3">I have just to repeat what once ISH said and thats the bitter truth of life and love.</font>

<font size="3">Rahiman Dhaga prem ka mat todo chatkai,</font>
<font size="3">Tute toh phir na jude, Jude gaanth pad jaaye.</font>

<font size="3">Once a glass / mirror has cracked, it can't be joined.</font>

<font size="3">So its better to leave and live a peaceful life then to live a compromised life.</font>



NBT-BV thumbnail
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Posted: 8 years ago
#5
BTW at this point I can only say that I don't have any like or dislike for any of the characters in this show. CVs create these characters and the illogical twists just for TRPs and their business.
So I don't take anything seriously.

You and your likes, put in lot of time and good thoughts in this forum and I respect everyone's POV & analysis and appreciate it.

BTW these analysis are more interesting and thought provoking than the show.


ND26 thumbnail
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Posted: 8 years ago
#6
Much needed post focusing on DevAkshi, not just Dev or Sona.
It's EXCELLENT 👏

We can forever keep arguing about who shares the bigger blame. The fact remains that both have made mistakes, external factors notwithstanding.

Looking forward to how to resurrect the relationship where 2 people loved each other & 'completed' each other... Communication does stand out as the single-most important factor.
It is the key 2avoid as well as fix problems.

The other 2 pillars you mention are very important too. Dev and Sona will have to have equal trust and equal respect for each other. Otherwise the relationship will be that of inequality and will be skewed.

_Payalj_ thumbnail
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Posted: 8 years ago
#7
Nice post but felt it is too pro Dev and almost completely absolved him of all the responsibility in this mess.
What you said about Sona is perfectly true and correct , her pride and overdose of self respect and desire to be accepted by everyone was her fatal flaw.

But dev had his shares of errors, in fact more than his fair share. His constant chanting my mother is my god would make any woman feel that keeping his mother's approval was of paramount importance. Emotional scars are the worst and take the longest to heal. If Sona had the bad habit of craving Ishwari's approval, it was because of Dev dumping her like trash because of ishwari and not going back till Ishwari gave permission. Tantrums don't count.

Dev never said a word to his stinking relatives, be it his sister or mami. He tried to keep them all happy but always at the cost of Sona's happiness. Also who can forget that epic get out and then blaming Sona for going out.

Today if I am again supporting Devakshi relationship it's because I feel that Dev has paid more than enough for his mistakes and deserves a second chance to be happy. Also it is obvious that howsoever happy and contended Sonakshi might pretend to be, she can never be truly happy without Dev.

I am all for second chances and hope and that is why I am with season 2.
Jade0001 thumbnail
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Posted: 8 years ago
#8
Its an Interesting analysis
CXYZ thumbnail
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Posted: 8 years ago
#9
Interesting take.

One point I'd like to make though is that I hv never ever absolved Dev of any blame. I hv always maintained that both Dev & Sona are responsible for whatever happened between them. The extent and share of blame doesn't really matter coz we are talking abt a relationship involving 2 people, not just 1 or the other.
I had stated this in my article that I am exploring the breakdown & possible resurrection from DevAkshi's perspective, not just Dev or Sona.

Thanks for your reply 😊



Originally posted by: _Payalj_

Nice post but felt it is too pro Dev and almost completely absolved him of all the responsibility in this mess.

What you said about Sona is perfectly true and correct , her pride and overdose of self respect and desire to be accepted by everyone was her fatal flaw.

But dev had his shares of errors, in fact more than his fair share. His constant chanting my mother is my god would make any woman feel that keeping his mother's approval was of paramount importance. Emotional scars are the worst and take the longest to heal. If Sona had the bad habit of craving Ishwari's approval, it was because of Dev dumping her like trash because of ishwari and not going back till Ishwari gave permission. Tantrums don't count.

Dev never said a word to his stinking relatives, be it his sister or mami. He tried to keep them all happy but always at the cost of Sona's happiness. Also who can forget that epic get out and then blaming Sona for going out.

Today if I am again supporting Devakshi relationship it's because I feel that Dev has paid more than enough for his mistakes and deserves a second chance to be happy. Also it is obvious that howsoever happy and contended Sonakshi might pretend to be, she can never be truly happy without Dev.

I am all for second chances and hope and that is why I am with season 2.

CXYZ thumbnail
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Posted: 8 years ago
#10
U spoke my mind! True, it really doesn't matter that much as to who did or didnt do something, especially in a sensitive & many times a complicated relationship like marriage. What is needed is to realize where things went wrong & take corrective action.

Thanks for your reply 😊


Originally posted by: ND26

Much needed post focusing on DevAkshi, not just Dev or Sona.
It's EXCELLENT 👏

We can forever keep arguing about who shares the bigger blame. The fact remains that both have made mistakes, external factors notwithstanding.

Looking forward to how to resurrect the relationship where 2 people loved each other & 'completed' each other... Communication does stand out as the single-most important factor.
It is the key 2avoid as well as fix problems.

The other 2 pillars you mention are very important too. Dev and Sona will have to have equal trust and equal respect for each other. Otherwise the relationship will be that of inequality and will be skewed.

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