Difficult to stomach this hypocrisy!

Originally posted by: Riddikulus

I see your point, and have thought about this myself a couple of times too. What I've been able to glean from all of it so far is that Dev occupies a position of privilege in Ishwari's scheme of things in more ways than one. The fact that Neha has from the beginning been located in the middle-child-caught-in-the-crossfire-of-poverty-and-responsibility zone says a fair bit about the fact that Ishwari has indeed been unfair to her, for reasons that were partially dictated by circumstance and partially by Ishwari's excessive love for Dev as a consequence of them. So in Neha's case, I've always felt that Ishwari is able to take a more objective stance because she has less to lose. Their bond as mother and child never had the chance to form and solidify like Ishwari and Dev's did. Plus, I suspect that there's a bit of the betiyan-toh-paraayi-hoti-hain mentality that has conditioned her to sort of be prepared to 'lose' Neha, so to speak. And that's not as much her hypocrisy as it is Indian society's in general, and she belongs to a generation that still lives by those norms, even in today's world. It's real enough.

Thanks for sharing your views. I agree with your point on how her feelings for Neha and Dev differ and not just because Dev is played by Shaheer who is the lead :)

However, one big point is that parents in India are more concerned about any romance associated with their daughters than their sons.

In Dev, on the other hand, she sees the bond she was meant to have for the rest of her life, unchanging and unconditional. Yes, her insecurity is childish and immature...I suppose one explanation for that could be her absolute inability to be objective. Let's face it, she's a clingy mom. Possibly the clingiest anyone could have, made more so because of the way circumstances have made her emotionally dependent on her son. Having to share him is going to be a huge change for her, and change this fundamental is not always easy to handle.

Also, her thinking immediately about how he didn't tell her is to my mind her way of rationalising her own emotions. She's an adult and there are moments where I do feel that she realises she's behaving against her better judgement. From her standpoint, to tell herself that she is disturbed about her son lying to her is much easier to accept than to admit that she is insecure about the very idea of her son having another woman in his life. This is what I feel.

Originally posted by: bookworm123

All of what you say is true. I am even ok with her reaction to phone call (when she thought it was Sona) and next day soup even after knowing that Dev also has strong feelings for Sona..

What bothered me more is that the CVs did not insert even one thought about Dev in all this, it was all about her. I know that if they start the introspection right away and make her rationalize already, the show can be wrapped up soon :) However, it still bothers me as a viewer. I would have been happier if they had shown a controlling mom in general but making her reactions for anything to do with Dev so OTT of late is difficult to stomach..

Originally posted by: Riddikulus

Thanks for sharing your views too! 😃 Yes, it's true - parents being overly concerned about daughters' romances in India is definitely a reality too. Can't deny that.

My best guess is that the writers wanted us to see that Ishwari is wise enough to think the way she did with Neha so that the contrast in her approach to Dev's romance is that much more unexpected. This is why I actually thought it was a good idea not to have shown her as a controlling mom. Because she isn't controlling as much as she's just clingy. And yes, decidedly selfish at this point. Fundamentally, that's what the core plot hinges on, I think. That she, even with all her love for her son, is not able to stomach his happiness because she wants him all to herself. That's one of the conundrums the story will try to navigate, I think. And like you said, the introspection will probably come much later. This is how I saw it as a viewer. Respect your opinion too, though.