Posted:
is funny - a couple of weeks ago, i couldnt see all the shows cause i had so much other stuff to do. but i had no problems writing on the forum. today, i can see all the shows - but my laptop, my internet, my forum! is kept away from me instead. my life is so weird. ah well, i guess we take what we get, no? well, most of the time anyway... cause im having serious doubts about taking this much of harman...!
* big thing: wasn't it more than just a little jarring to see lalit juneja back with his papers so soon after the ceremonies? whatever happened to that spiel that he gave to prem about spending time and effort on his wife? the woman is deaf-dumb-mute and no one seems to care?? and of course, it didn't help matters when harman came in smilingly promising to take prems place... at least he could have killed the smiles?
and i thought about it for a moment, wondering why i was so put off. i mean, this family is in financial trouble. they do have to work to keep afloat. and then it struck me - it was the pacing that bugged me. we just spent the last .. what? .. 8? 9? episodes dragging out the one or two days since prem went missing. and now we just leap into business as usual..? well, business-without-prem as usual. i guess i've always been a tad uncomfortable with this jerky pace of the show -- is linked to my disliking the editing of this show. every other show (and now i know a bit about those) is far better edited and more smoothly paced - there is less of jerking the story around. and it was always like this, i think, except ... then there was prem-distraction. and now there is ... (bwahahahaha!) harman!
(poor guy. he does have a lot of shoe to fill up, and it looks quite apparent that he is gonna fall flat on his face.... hmmm. well, serves him right. who asked him to try! 😆)
* ugh thing: that harman-meher-maya thing was gross... meher being a wimp is not helping distract me from lack-of-prem-heer. seriously! what is wrong with her? 🤢 this is one character that has not grown well in the show... pity, cause she was rather lovely in the beginning. kinda the character in the maan zoo that was like the preet character in the juneja zoo. donchya think?
* ugh thing: ratpal with his smile-wannabe-sneer look. enough to make one feel green around the gills. mix that with ratpal mom and brother, top it with the sudden memory of his swearing to be the ravan in this story and you're certain to run to the loo to throw up dinner... seriously. 🤢
after gargling with mouthwash, it struck me though: did he look upset when heer dashed in promising to make sure ratpal-veera wedding will happen on time??
* big ugh thing: lalit juneja saying that after harman, ratpal is the support in his life -- all in front of a preet who suddenly looks lost and alone and young and defenceless? y'know? more than w&w to see harman fall flat on his face, i'm suddenly filled with curiousity of exactly in how lalit juneja is going to weep with regret: for not having appreciated prem more while he was there. for not having helped preet grow up after he lost his pb. i'm suddenly w&w for this with even more anticipation than when i waited to see dirtchachi get what she deserved for all her dirty tricks. is really strange how an apparently good guy is actually one of the grayest characters on this show.. is a difficult character to create - sometimes i wonder if the "goodness" of lalit juneja is all just a fiction of prems imagination. i mean, think about it. as far as i remember, it was only prem who kept talking about lalit juneja's goodness. harman was never that vocal. gayatri-mom has actually told lalit juneja off more than once! so it was only prem who convinced us - with his paragraph** monologues 😆 - that his bauji is a good guy. actually, lalit juneja isn't. he just isn't. 😕
(** credit to only.asking who pointed out that prem speaks in paragraphs, not sentences. 😆)
* big thing: hmm.. just what is heer going through? is she convinced that prem is .. uh .. no more around in .. uh ... physical form? or that he is, but that he is not there just now? or that he is hanging around in spirit form - where he was forced to go by the dastardly terrorist act, not his own free will - and waiting till she finishes what he wanted to get done but couldn't and then go till they can go together? i couldn't actually figure out what heer is thinking about all this. and i want to know to know. i do. 😕
cause i am still smoking angry at that "last message of prems". it is a front. it is incomplete. it is not prem. and so it is a a smokescreen - that entire monologue is. i am more and more convinced that none of this is real, and is just a part of prems hallucination while waiting in the fire. seriously. it. just. does. not. fit. and fit anywhere.
and what made me even more angry is a) ratpal's looking at heer and b) their attempt to bring back the very first moment that prem realised how much heer loved him -- her sacrifice of giving herself up to the police for his freedom and his wealth, and their "conversation" with the bars in between. gosh, what a conversation that was! mostly eyes. surrounded by the poetry of prems questions to heer that wasnot looking for answers. yes, he spoke paragraphs there too - but i did not notice - not even for a micromoment.
at that time, that point, it was all just perfect.
and to have a ghost of that moment brough back - literally! with prem as a ghost in heers heart and mind - made me angrier at prem. what was that look? it was quintissential prem-heer - there was love. there was a sense of .. waiting? a patience? in prem's eyes. against the sorrow - a regret? - in heer's eyes? oh, it was all too complex for me. sad i am.
* little thing: of course it has to be heer who will be the one to break gayatri-moms frozen state. heer of the prem-heer-are-one person. and it felt so true - sometimes it is as little and as silly as a name written in mehendi on a hand that can focus a fractured mind enough to break out of its misery. i kinda loved that... *sigh* i know. im a sucker, amnt i? set up, wrapped up and ready for cooking by the tellers of this story.
but who else thought it was desperately odd that none of her daughters are anywhere near her at this time?
so, i admit: im waiting for them to unravel how prem-heer-are-one will continue to be. it looks desperately hopeless at the moment, doesn't it? but sometimes - very rarely - stories do remain true, while looking like there is no other way to go but be false. and the best example of that was in the lord of the rings - don't know how many here have read it. gandalf the grey dies - spectacularly, heroic, irrefutably. and all hope is lost. but! he comes back. and he is gandalf the white. and the war is won.
i know, i know. you are all laughing at me. jrrtolkien and the scriptwriters at balaji telefilms - beings in totally different dimensions, planes, worlds. but ... maybe..? just this once...? no? 😆 should i name myself estee the hopeless? estee the insane? have no idea where this is going to go. but prem-heer-are-one. and i think that is the way it will remain. and until it happens - even if they bore us to death with tales of the rest of the family - i will be w&w. 😆
highlight of the episode; yes, it made me kinda angry. but damnit! it was prem in white!!!! even if the sleeves werenot rolled up halfway. (what??! you didnot notice??!! 😆) and that look they shared was opaque. but it was an prem-heer eyelock. and *sigh* it was enough to make me smile a little goopily...
* big thing: wasn't it more than just a little jarring to see lalit juneja back with his papers so soon after the ceremonies? whatever happened to that spiel that he gave to prem about spending time and effort on his wife? the woman is deaf-dumb-mute and no one seems to care?? and of course, it didn't help matters when harman came in smilingly promising to take prems place... at least he could have killed the smiles?
and i thought about it for a moment, wondering why i was so put off. i mean, this family is in financial trouble. they do have to work to keep afloat. and then it struck me - it was the pacing that bugged me. we just spent the last .. what? .. 8? 9? episodes dragging out the one or two days since prem went missing. and now we just leap into business as usual..? well, business-without-prem as usual. i guess i've always been a tad uncomfortable with this jerky pace of the show -- is linked to my disliking the editing of this show. every other show (and now i know a bit about those) is far better edited and more smoothly paced - there is less of jerking the story around. and it was always like this, i think, except ... then there was prem-distraction. and now there is ... (bwahahahaha!) harman!
(poor guy. he does have a lot of shoe to fill up, and it looks quite apparent that he is gonna fall flat on his face.... hmmm. well, serves him right. who asked him to try! 😆)
* ugh thing: that harman-meher-maya thing was gross... meher being a wimp is not helping distract me from lack-of-prem-heer. seriously! what is wrong with her? 🤢 this is one character that has not grown well in the show... pity, cause she was rather lovely in the beginning. kinda the character in the maan zoo that was like the preet character in the juneja zoo. donchya think?
* ugh thing: ratpal with his smile-wannabe-sneer look. enough to make one feel green around the gills. mix that with ratpal mom and brother, top it with the sudden memory of his swearing to be the ravan in this story and you're certain to run to the loo to throw up dinner... seriously. 🤢
after gargling with mouthwash, it struck me though: did he look upset when heer dashed in promising to make sure ratpal-veera wedding will happen on time??
* big ugh thing: lalit juneja saying that after harman, ratpal is the support in his life -- all in front of a preet who suddenly looks lost and alone and young and defenceless? y'know? more than w&w to see harman fall flat on his face, i'm suddenly filled with curiousity of exactly in how lalit juneja is going to weep with regret: for not having appreciated prem more while he was there. for not having helped preet grow up after he lost his pb. i'm suddenly w&w for this with even more anticipation than when i waited to see dirtchachi get what she deserved for all her dirty tricks. is really strange how an apparently good guy is actually one of the grayest characters on this show.. is a difficult character to create - sometimes i wonder if the "goodness" of lalit juneja is all just a fiction of prems imagination. i mean, think about it. as far as i remember, it was only prem who kept talking about lalit juneja's goodness. harman was never that vocal. gayatri-mom has actually told lalit juneja off more than once! so it was only prem who convinced us - with his paragraph** monologues 😆 - that his bauji is a good guy. actually, lalit juneja isn't. he just isn't. 😕
(** credit to only.asking who pointed out that prem speaks in paragraphs, not sentences. 😆)
* big thing: hmm.. just what is heer going through? is she convinced that prem is .. uh .. no more around in .. uh ... physical form? or that he is, but that he is not there just now? or that he is hanging around in spirit form - where he was forced to go by the dastardly terrorist act, not his own free will - and waiting till she finishes what he wanted to get done but couldn't and then go till they can go together? i couldn't actually figure out what heer is thinking about all this. and i want to know to know. i do. 😕
cause i am still smoking angry at that "last message of prems". it is a front. it is incomplete. it is not prem. and so it is a a smokescreen - that entire monologue is. i am more and more convinced that none of this is real, and is just a part of prems hallucination while waiting in the fire. seriously. it. just. does. not. fit. and fit anywhere.
and what made me even more angry is a) ratpal's looking at heer and b) their attempt to bring back the very first moment that prem realised how much heer loved him -- her sacrifice of giving herself up to the police for his freedom and his wealth, and their "conversation" with the bars in between. gosh, what a conversation that was! mostly eyes. surrounded by the poetry of prems questions to heer that wasnot looking for answers. yes, he spoke paragraphs there too - but i did not notice - not even for a micromoment.
at that time, that point, it was all just perfect.
and to have a ghost of that moment brough back - literally! with prem as a ghost in heers heart and mind - made me angrier at prem. what was that look? it was quintissential prem-heer - there was love. there was a sense of .. waiting? a patience? in prem's eyes. against the sorrow - a regret? - in heer's eyes? oh, it was all too complex for me. sad i am.
* little thing: of course it has to be heer who will be the one to break gayatri-moms frozen state. heer of the prem-heer-are-one person. and it felt so true - sometimes it is as little and as silly as a name written in mehendi on a hand that can focus a fractured mind enough to break out of its misery. i kinda loved that... *sigh* i know. im a sucker, amnt i? set up, wrapped up and ready for cooking by the tellers of this story.
but who else thought it was desperately odd that none of her daughters are anywhere near her at this time?
so, i admit: im waiting for them to unravel how prem-heer-are-one will continue to be. it looks desperately hopeless at the moment, doesn't it? but sometimes - very rarely - stories do remain true, while looking like there is no other way to go but be false. and the best example of that was in the lord of the rings - don't know how many here have read it. gandalf the grey dies - spectacularly, heroic, irrefutably. and all hope is lost. but! he comes back. and he is gandalf the white. and the war is won.
i know, i know. you are all laughing at me. jrrtolkien and the scriptwriters at balaji telefilms - beings in totally different dimensions, planes, worlds. but ... maybe..? just this once...? no? 😆 should i name myself estee the hopeless? estee the insane? have no idea where this is going to go. but prem-heer-are-one. and i think that is the way it will remain. and until it happens - even if they bore us to death with tales of the rest of the family - i will be w&w. 😆
highlight of the episode; yes, it made me kinda angry. but damnit! it was prem in white!!!! even if the sleeves werenot rolled up halfway. (what??! you didnot notice??!! 😆) and that look they shared was opaque. but it was an prem-heer eyelock. and *sigh* it was enough to make me smile a little goopily...
Fan Fictions
